DAE feel guilty for being depressed when the weather is good?

basically what the title says. i prefer the winter months, because at least everyone else is kinda in a slump and a little sad that there’s no good weather, but when the skies are blue and the sun is shining i feel such guilt for still feeling depressed.

like for once, there was good weather all of last week, and i hated it. everyone was out doing things, everyone was with their families or loved ones being happy and i was just sat there feeling like complete shit.

for example, at school, everyone was having fun playing on the grass with their friends and just being like a normal teenager, whilst i was sat alone on the grass, feeling ready to just end it all.

it just sucks because everyone expects you to be happy when the sun is out, but all i can think about is how i’d rather be alone in bed doing nothing forever.

i guess i was just wondering if anyone else felt this guilt :,)