About 6 months ago, my GF of two years and I went to her sister’s wedding. After the ceremony, everyone is getting drunk and dancing as folks do at receptions. I didn’t know many people so I was introducing myself, having drinks, and making conversation. I go to find my gf so we can dance and I can’t find her. I knew she was helping with the wedding, but after searching for her for about an hour, I start to get annoyed and confused and begin asking her family. Finally, her mom, who likes me a lot, goes to find her and when she returns, my GF says she was with one of the grooms friends hanging out. Of course, this sounds suspect to me and she’s wasted and says they were doing coke together but nothing else happened. I get really upset and end up leaving the wedding. We work things out, but I can’t really shake it. I’ve brought it up to her a couple of times because her story keeps changing and the latest time, she flips out and throws her phone and storms off and says my questions are feeling like accusations. I simply asked that she admit that what this guy did was disrespectful and he, in my mind, was trying to get with her in my face during her sister’s wedding. They had a previous “friendly” history and she said he’s a dork and there’s nothing to it. He just wanted to do coke and hang out. AITAH here????
My GF (29 F) disappeared on me (31 M) during a wedding and hung out with another guy. She said nothing happened, but it is still bothering me months later. AITAH?
r/AITAH
Comments
Nta for how ur feeling but u either need to accept it and trust her and let it go or move on to someone elss
She is gaslighting you because she cheated on you. He just wanted to do coke and hang out….. yeah right!
NTA for how you feel but if you don’t trust her and you keep bringing it up then you’re definitely an a hole because at that point if it bothers you so much break up with her
NTA.
It’s normal to feel hurt and confused after your girlfriend disappeared for an hour at a wedding to hang out (and do drugs) with a guy she has history with. The fact that her story keeps changing and she gets defensive when you ask questions is a red flag. You’re trying to understand what happened, not attack her. Trust matters – and your feelings are valid.
It’s a leave angle fam. If you’ve not shaken the feeling for 6 months you never will.
NTA, but honestly, deep down you already know she cheated. She has a history with this guy, they were gone for at least an hour her story keeps changing about what happened.. come on. You need to either accept that she cheated and that you can’t trust her word on anything, or cut your losses and break it off.
She was likely in a bedroom riding the baloney pony, while higher than a kite. If that is something you want to forgive. then you have a big heart. If it was me, I’d kick her to the curb. I’m not into being a “cuck”, but perhaps you don’t mind this humiliating behavior.
In any event get a STD test ASAP and be very suspicious if she turns up pregnant in the near future as it may be a child fathered by one of her dalliances.
dude.. it doesn’t matter if they banged or no- she flat out broke your trust and changed her story multiple times.
Not the asshole. Not even close.
She was getting her meat cut
NTA. Disappearing for an hour to do coke with another guy at a wedding? That’s shady no matter how you spin it.
You need to tell her your trust has been broken , and her not getting her story straight just makes you doubt her more. Tell her you need her to be upfront and honest, or give you the number of the guy so you can ask him. If she can’t be honest, you may as well be done.
She might’ve cheated on you or she might be telling the truth. Seems unlikely you’ll ever really know the truth.
You’ll have to figure out how you feel about that.
NTA.
Move
YTA. You are trying to control her to the extreme. The only way you could hope to earn her forgiveness is if he enjoys her on your bed while you are made to watch from the corner. This is the ONLY way to fix this situation
I didn’t know people did come by putting various body parts into other people’s body parts, but I’m kind of naive. I mean, not as naive as someone who believes she wasn’t fooling around with a groomsman at her sister’s wedding, but hey! Best case scenario, she’s got a drug problem. Sounds like a keeper – NOT.
NTA doing coke at your sisters wedding is gross behavior regardless
I mean is it really impossible to believe she went and did coke with some dork? Like you were drinking and I’m betting the “hour” wasn’t quite as long as you believe. Trust her or don’t but make up your mind. Reddit ain’t gonna help,
NTA
NTA. Read up on trickle truth, gaslighting, and blind spouses.
Sorry OP, but you can’t let it go. Her behavior was disrespectful at best. Cheating at worst.
If it’s still bothering you after 6 months, driving a deeper wedge in your relationship, just end it now. No need to continue falling deeper and deeper into a bad relationship.
End it now and be done with it.
YTAH for still being together with her.
I would dump her ass that very day. Even if nothing has happened (it has!) she was more than disrespectful. What are you waiting for?
The relationship is already over, you just don’t know it yet. She cheated and will do this again. Save yourself the grief and move on on your own terms.
Nta
NTA
Quoting Sophia from The Golden Girls:
“The girl’s a slut.”
They did something brother. Break up, she won’t fess up so you create your own peace and leave
NTA at all. You need to make her an ex is what you need to do.
lol. She was doing coke at her sisters wedding and her mom went to get her.
Sounds like the trash took itself out.
NTA. If you feel like trust is broken and she’s still not being honest, then it’s time to ask yourself if you still want to be in this relationship.
Guy+girl+coke=sex. Definitely. She’s fooling you. Updateme.
You don’t trust her. She behaves in worrisome ways that strain your trust. She doesn’t give a damn that it bothers you. Why sign up for that. I’d move on.
It’s just uncool no matter how you slice it. If you dumped her NTA
Thank her for showing her true colors early. Leave her. Dating is the trial phase, she failed.
You need to break up with her even for doing exactly what she said she did! Weddings are a time for love: her ditching you to hang-out with another guy is grounds for immediate break-up. Doing coke: immediate break-up (unless you’re both scumbags).
Besides, she was totally fucking him.
Sorry. If this is still eating at you then you know what you have to do.
Is this AI? If so, you da asshole but for AI reasons.
You don’t need her. Let her do coke with him and whatever else they were up to. Dump her like a bad coke habit
She cheated. She ain’t the one, my man…
Story is always changing? Yeah man you gotta let this trash go.
NTA and NOT your girlfriend. End it.
Check this out it’s called AIRDROID my girl has that shit on my phone and it’s free and you can see everything and read messages and have access to the entire phone even hear too. Need help go on fiverr my girl has it available for helping get started.
NTA
dump her, she blew that dude
I think you know what you want to do. Just do it. Don’t wait any longer.
He did coke. And your GF. This guy had a great time at her sister’s wedding. You did not.
Facts. Leave her.
Typical Reddit answer, I know…but tell her to kick rocks. Simple as that.
YTA to yourself if there’s coke involve she’ll do anything to get it that fix.
Should have left 6 months ago.
She at least blew him but probably fucked him. It doesn’t take over an hour to do some coke alone with one man.
You need to leave, because she will never tell you the truth. No matter what she tells you it’ll never be enough because she literally disappeared with this guy there’s no telling what she did. By her reaction though I would say it’s not even worth it. My bf and I have been together for over a year and I would never make the conscious choice to run off with a guy for an hour to do coke even if nothing happened. She still choose to do coke with this guy without even coming to find you or being like no leave me alone in the first place. What type of person just does that and doesn’t think about their partner? I say it’s not worth it, break it off and don’t even try to find the truth atp because the only thing you need to know is she made a choice to disappear with another guy for an hour. Simple as that.
So… she is gone, hidding, doing coke, with a grooms
Is she an EX now?
Is her story changing cause she’s trickle-truthing you? If so then I would just end it.
Cease & desist the relationship.
NTA She sounds like a fun time just have to decide if this is a rollercoaster you want to stay on
Well you are the AH here along with her. You shouldn’t be doing coke Jesus Christ.
Dump
She hangs out with another man while you’re with her at a wedding.
She does coke.
She’s constantly lying to you.
She thinks that it’s not a big deal to ignore you so she can spend time with a random guy.
She’s a walking red flag. Not gonna tell you what to do but whatever your decision is, she clearly needs to change.
Buddy… it’s all spelled out for you. Your GF was the wedding hoe. Move on and rebuild your dignity. NTA
Coke and drunk added with an hour long disappearance . Yep, they were doing it. Sorry man
Sorry dude she cheated:(
Our GF*
Not the asshole. In your heart you know exactly what happened if the Coke story is true she was riding the rails and then she got railed. Her bullshit story that keeps changing indicates her feeding you trickle truth. Her freaking out on you and throwing her phone is almost admitting it if you’re OK with that then stay with her and work on the relationship. If you’re not OK with it Break up and move on.
Obviously she would rather hang out with a coke head dork than you…and she has no problem telling you that to your face…imagine what she isn’t telling you. That deal would have ended right there.
No guy offers a woman coke without also offering cock. It is a mutually beneficial situation as old as time itself.