Hi everyone. I’m wondering if anyone can give me any hope or has experienced this. I just turned 35 and am single still after a 4 year long relationship ended. I also got laid off from my job and am starting to have a lot of doubts about my future. I had wanted a husband and children, but if I didn’t get that, I had a high paying job to fall back on. Now I have nothing. I feel hopeless and very depressed
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You’re defining your life on things you don’t really have much control over: a husband/kids and a career… so when those things you’re defining your life don’t pan out, it feels like there’s nothing and “no hope”.
I used to define my life on my job… then I got laid off during the ’08 Recession. I never made that mistake again. I have a great career now, but my job is what I do to fund the rest of my life.. it isn’t “my life” anymore.
I would recommend starting there. Build a life you love that isn’t centered on any one thing. Don’t define your life by what you have or don’t have.
You grieve the losses and then really think about what you want and what is going to take to get it. There are proactive things you can do to increase your chances of a good relationship and a good career. You have to work towards these things. They won’t fall in your lap while you’re sitting at your house. But if it’s really recent, you’re probably going to have to take some self-care time. A therapist might help.
Sorry to hear but time heals the relationship as for the job just keep thriving. Keep your head up
Sounds like a transformative time to reflect and shift away from what’s no longer working. It might feel like effort, but it’s important if you want to start reaching some of the things you’re aiming for. Maybe even try nurturing a hobby or interest.
Sorry to hear that! I’ve never had a relationship that long or met someone I wanted to have one with….So, I encourage you to see some of the positives (assuming that’s possible at this moment for you).
Finally, this was the end of an era. You have the chance to start anew. Cherish this new season! Wishing you the best!
Omg, are we the same? I am also 35 and single. I just got laid off this past Tuesday! I’m trying to think of it as a transformative period. Anything can happen and I’m welcoming it. Although I don’t want children and marriage is whatever. I do want a life partner, though. It would be nice to have that second income right about now 🤣. You may not have what you envisioned right now, but the universe has its reasons. You got this, let yourself feel all of it and remember you’re allowed to be sad right now because this f’ing blows! I’m so so so worried that I won’t find anything before my severance runs out, but we gotta keep looking ahead! ✨✨ lots of luck to you
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. The only way out through. Embrace the pain, work on yourself, take time to get to know you, your strengths, your fears, what makes you spark, what makes you cry. If you don’t know and love yourself first nobody will. When you are comfortable being with yourself, comfortable in your own skin, that shows, people and opportunities will come to you. I don’t mean it in some kind of esoteric way. Think about it, don’t you think that there are people that have a certain magnetism? Others want to gravitate around them, talk to them, work with them. I’m not talking about looks. When you meet someone that’s authentic, not afraid of showing their pain and their joy, you want to stick around. You mentioned you’re depressed, in that case, prioritize therapy. Give yourself some love and kindness.