Hi, I (17F) is turning 18 in a month and I’ll be going to college this year. I’m from ph and since childhood, I never knew what I wanted to pursue. At an early age, I used to want to be a nurse just like my mother. Then idk, it changed when I was in high school, I still had a dream to be a nurse but then she told me I should be a doctor instead. Then at that moment, I just remembered being unsure on what to be. Sure, I’ll become a doctor. But I don’t know what kind of Doctor.
A few months ago, my mother, a nurse from abroad, told me one day that I should become a Pediatrician because of their high salary, and I said okay. So now that college is super near, I didn’t know whether I’m gonna choose nursing or medtech. So I asked my friend and family for opinions, they say that MedTech is a better Pre Med to becoming a Doctor.
So I’m gonna pursue Medtech, and after graduating, go to Med School. But the problem is, I don’t have any faith or hope for myself. Because I forget easily, I get unmotivated, I get overwhelmed by the thought of learning a lot. I know I should’ve used ‘family’ as a motivation and I’m trying to do that.
I come from an extended family, but my father was absent (for years, my parents were never married and my mother had me when she was 21) and My household doesn’t do affections or words of encouragement. Just nothing but they show their care in their own ways (ways that I cannot see but can feel)
Any advice on how to navigate my thoughts? I don’t open up in fear of judgement and I’m not gonna try because I’m scared I’ll be called dramatic.
Comments
it is normal to feel this way, especially when you’ve had to make choices based on what others think is best. you’re not alone in feeling unsure or unmotivated, and it doesn’t make you weak, it just means you’re human. you’re already doing something brave by thinking it through and trying anyway, even if it’s hard. that’s not being dramatic, that’s being self-aware.
This is perfectly normal,
Trust me, most people your age act like they know, but most of us don’t have a clue
I was having the same fears at your age and just went through the motion.
I am 34 now, never really figured it out, but I got the chance to learn a lot, tried different things and landed on a job that I love. The path ain’t straight
Since your mother is a nurse, maybe you could ask her if she knows a doctor that would let you shadow them for a day or 2?
Or you could try to volunteer in a hospital to have a feel of what it is to work there