I told the wife but I can never let anyone know.

My ex who used to live rent and utility free with me for years cheated on me with a married man she met at the job we all worked at.

I found evidence of the infidelity through text messages and saved screenshots she had on her phone and desktop messages I was able to access but I could not save or forward them because I was in a position that did not allow for it.

(My ex was mentally unstable, off her meds she was supposed to be on, had no respect for personal boundaries or respect for property that wasn’t hers, and shown historical proof of not handling “losing” well. She had vindictive streaks against those who “wronged” her and did not let things go. And the nature of the job we all worked in, they would have been able to potentially track things back to me and I was actively trying to leave.)
So, I anonymously texted the wife. I never dropped any names. I just warned her husband was definitely cheating on her with someone at work, that she should investigate very specific platforms and not to trust anything that was said.

I hated how my ex and the man talked about this wife (calling her a dumb b***, how useless she was, how she “made” him so unhappy, etc.), how my ex coveted their home and everything this wife had (a beautiful home and kids, money, etc.), and seeing the text messages of their infidelity and garbage personality, how they met up consistently (even on my birthday), and how they even met up at their home when the kids were sleeping.
So I did what I felt was right and told her.

It blew up of course. I kept it vague on purpose, but the wife immediately blew it up and made life for everyone involved (including my ex and the married man) and threatened to get the job to investigate. This of course proceeded to make my ex and the man get stressed, who then lashed out as much as they could, and vent about it in their “private” messages.

I was of course speculated as the number one person especially by my ex who wanted to try and make my life hell (at both work and home) to see if I would confess (threats of legal ramifications, trying to play a power dynamic of waking me up at odd hours despite politely asking her not to, still crossing my boundaries, etc.) She tried very hard to “break” me, but eventually I only owned up to seeing messages.

Thankfully, I had found a new job, was able to transition out and after finding the concrete proof of the lies and infidelity, I had her move out . And although she fought it to the last day (trying to verbally berate me and make me feel like shit about my decisions constantly) and as much as I could have done something horrible, I tried to be the better adult and simply helped moved her out, assembled furniture in the new apartment, and gave one real farewell gift before going no contact.

(I also took necessary safety precautions that if my ex decided to try and “visit” again after the fact, she would be in serious legal troubles).

The man never did leave his wife (seemingly). My ex is miserably single after months of the move out with no safety cushion or prospects. And I was the one who got away and honestly? I’m in the best shape and happiness of my life. (I feel much more levelheaded, my new job has been nothing but wonderful, and everyone stops me to tell me how beautiful I am (?)).

I played this very carefully as to not have a vengeful ex for the rest of my life. I didn’t want even the possibility of being involved in something messier to happen in my life.
I hope that man learns his lesson and stays away from young women (I suspect my ex was not the only one) and I hope my ex stays away (she does not learn. I learned he was not the only one she cheated with and in fact, I suspect all the years we were together, she cheated on me with others now).

I lied, but I never left anything incriminating or spoke poorly. I simply wanted people to know and also be free.