March 2024 I met a guy (29M) and I was (16M) at the time. I know that already sounds incredibly wrong (just keep reading or skip to bottom part). He guessed my age immediately and was fine with it (red flag 1). He was also a drug dealer and meth addict (he looked like a regular person in society). Anyways we started hanging out and became sexual very quickly. In between that he would always tell me how he wants to take care of me, buy me stuff like shoes, and tell me that I’m his. He was into all sorts of odd things like threesomes, Anal Dominatrix’s, sextapes. Then he peer pressured me to make a sextape with him. After that everytime we had sex like every single time his phones out he’s recording. He also peer pressured me to do meth with him about 2-3 times. ( I didn’t really know what it was at the time or what it could do to me).
Fast forward to May 2024 I find out after snooping on instagram that he has a whole girlfriend that he is living with somewhere around his age (Very pretty girl). They were on vacation with each other a week after he told me he loved me and wanted to push things farther. He also has a child (boy) but she’s not the babymother and he’s is on child support. I didn’t message the girlfriend (which I should’ve I know I was wrong ). I was so hurt, confused, and jealous I didn’t know what to do. The day after I found out, he texts me to come see him at his mom’s place (he still didn’t know I knew about his girlfriend). I didn’t have to say anything but he knew I knew by how I was acting. We then had hate sex and in the middle of it I stopped and left abruptly because I couldn’t stopping thinking about it while we were having sex. After that I just ghosted him.
Fast forward from June-September he’s sending all these “ I miss you”, “I wanna see you”, wyd” text and sending UNSOLICITED nudes at random from these different numbers and iCloud’s. I dodged all his attempts to see me because of how hurt I was (I did still miss him) and they were still together going on trips etc.
In september I gave in, we had hate sex. We had pillow talked and I mentioned the girlfriend. He asked if was I going to extort him or tell her (I should’ve) and he became extremely paranoid. I told him I wasn’t and I just wanted an explanation. He told me he didn’t want her anymore and it was on its way out the door. I believed him unfortunately. He told me his girlfriend also didn’t know he likes men or anal pleasure at all either. We continued texting and seeing each other and in November they broke up. He was still not doing what he said he was for me so I blocked him for 2 months.
February 2025 I unblock him and we meet up because he wants to “talk”. He’s in a hotel with another older addict and they’re both high on meth. He tells me how he got kicked out by his NEW girlfriend who he’s living with. She found out he’s gay outed him to his family and called him the F slur. He then proceeds to start trauma dumping on me. Telling me he was touched by an older family member as a child and doesn’t know why he’s like this as in (gay or bisexual). I also found out he was doing butt drugs (boofing) and went to prison for grand larceny few years back. He’s texting the new girlfriend trying to reconcile and get his clothes from her apartment. She’s texting him saying he broke her heart and she can’t be with him anymore but he wants to go back to her. He sends her the location to the hotel telling her to come to where we are, which made no sense (she declined). Then said out his mouth he would have a threesome with both of us if it came down to it. As I’m getting ready to leave he has the audacity to ask if he can come back to my place. I deny him and left. Blocked him for good.
I was so distraught I opened up to my closest friends and told them the situation. We came to the conclusion he was grooming me and I reflected for a month and he really was. I still don’t know how to feel or why I’m making this post. I turn 18 soon and I hope this doesn’t affect future relationships or my adult life.
Comments
You poor girl, this is beyond grooming, this is full on sexual abuse, exploitation, and being drugged and trafficked for child porn. Please please please do not ever talk to a guy more than 2yrs older than you til you’re late 20s. Please go to therapy Hun, you seem smart, get this worked out now with a therapist and take a break from any sexual relationships until you do.