so this happened last Sunday and i still think about it. it was late as hell, like middle of the night, and i hadn’t slept in literal days. not just tossing and turning, i mean full on insomnia. my brain wouldn’t shut up, racing with random thoughts, memories, just noise. i was desperate to sleep. like to the point where i didn’t even care what i had to do, i just wanted to shut everything off for a while.
i remembered i had some benadryl in the cabinet, figured hey it’s supposed to make you drowsy right? so i took some. not sure how many. didn’t count. i wasn’t really thinking, just grabbed a bunch and swallowed them. probably way too many i didn’t care. i just wanted to sleep, i just wanted silence
but i didn’t get sleepy at all. instead my body started feeling weird. like heavy and light at the same time. my skin felt like it didn’t belong to me. i couldn’t sit still but i also couldn’t move. and then the hallucinations started.
it wasn’t fun or colorful or anything like that. it was dark. creepy. like i’d see shadows move in the corner of my eye, and when i’d look, there’d be this figure just standing there. not doing anything, just watching. and it kept happening. i swear one was in the hallway just staring at me. i blinked and it was gone, but it kept coming back. not always in the same place. sometimes behind me. sometimes just barely out of reach.
i started hearing things it was loud, just enough to make me feel like someone was talking right next to my ear. i heard my mom’s voice at one point and she’s been dead since 2017. she was calling my name like she used to when she was mad. the whole house felt like it was breathing, like the walls were alive and just waiting for me to lose it. I blacked out a few times. came to in weird places. once i was outside barefoot on the porch, another time i was in the shower in my boxers. i don’t remember walking there. i don’t remember choosing to move, it scared the shit outta me. i really thought i broke my brain. but here’s the really fucked up part…
once the fear passed, once i kinda gave into it, it felt good. like genuinely good. everything got quiet. the racing thoughts were gone. all the stuff that normally keeps me up at night? just… vanished. the hallucinations didn’t feel like threats anymore, they felt like company. the silence in my head was comforting in this really dark way. like i wasn’t supposed to be there, but also didn’t care. Part of me wants to do it again. not to die or anything, just to feel that again. that peace. that escape. i know it’s bad. i know it’s stupid. but it felt like i left reality for a while and honestly… reality kinda sucks most days.
idk. i guess i just needed to put this somewhere. has anyone else gone through something like this? i feel like i opened a door and something’s still on the other side watching me.
Comments
You didn’t open a door or anything like that. Benadryl/diphenhydramine can get you high I abused it like 3 times it doesn’t have any euphoria to it really it gives dysphoria and all the other issues you described aswell
Not me sitting here reading this 15 mins after popping 4 Benadryl’s lol
Benadryl can absolutely cause hallucinations if you take too much. They make a person very very high.
Dude accidentally hung out with the Hat Man
I never fuck with Benadryl. Even taking one makes my head feel like it’s been filled with helium and the only reason it doesn’t float away is because it’s attached to my neck. It does make me super tired though. I’ve taken it at work and passed out at my desk.
First of all sounds like you should have gotten medical assistance. The second of all don’t be doing that s***. That’s not cool man what happens if you get stuck in the ugly side of it……
Praying you get some natural sleep.
If one takes too much Benadryl you can hallucinate and get sick you know?
Benadryl is not a fun high kids. Scrape your bowls if you need a buzz. They say it causes dementia so I rock a box a day. Have you ever been crazy? I have
Lmaooo dont take more than 3 unless you want a visit from the Hat Man
You saw the shadow people definitely not good for your brain not as bad as staying up for 72 hours straight though to see them.
I think you should take it easy so it won’t result to addiction, addiction is bad especially with Benadryl, judging from the fact that it makes you hallucinate, you can’t keep hallucinating all day if it results to addiction.
I am sorry you are suffering from racing thoughts and insomnia. There is something underneath it all as the cause. Get to the cause of your racing thoughts and insomnia. It might be completely physical and your body needs medical assistance. It might be a combo of emotional/mental health and your mind and brain need assistance together. I’ve had to seek help before and get to the root causes of these physical symptoms. Some have been physical like a slipped disc in my neck – got some shots back there and got better over time with some PT as well. Some have been emotional and my body was basically throwing up physical symptoms because that was it’s only way of telling me to take care of trauma/mental health/emotional well-being. I do not listen well so I’ve had to go through lots of physical pain and mental agony to become willing to address what the causes are. I am better off now though. Nothing has been scarier to me than my untreated self… its a personal hell that only I could choose to climb out of.
Next time try magnesium instead of benadryl. It helps calm racing thoughts.
Have you talked to a doctor about the way you’ve been feeling? It could be a physical issue like a hyperactive thyroid as well as something mental, I dated someone with a hyperactive thyroid whose symptoms mimicked bipolar. Either way a doctor can give you more help than a crappy Benadryl trip.
Intentionally did it twice as a kid in the mid 90’s in the before times (before information was so easily available). 1st time I just remember having an itchy scalp and having to go to the toilet a lot. 2nd time I was out and about with some pretty straight friends (that tried it too) at an Ani DiFranco concert. I had a better time that time but there were too many side effects compared to mushrooms or acid. I don’t remember getting drowsy at all if anything it was invigorating.
Benadryl always gives me restless leg syndrome
I was seriously addicted to benadryl for at least a year and would induce the very things you talk about here, every night, on purpose. I won’t say how many I took nightly, but I will say that I’d run through a new bottle in a few days.
Regardless, I am sure I did irreparable damage to my brain and it was harder for me to quit than any other addiction, ngl. (Even when I was struggling with alcoholism.)
Don’t do it again man, ain’t worth it seriously
Are thc edibles legal where you live? Indica knocks me out and I wake up feeling great. Also, I read books to go to sleep. It shuts off all the intrusive thoughts and allows my body to relax so I can sleep. Good luck finding something that works for you. Insomnia is awful.