Before my (51M) parents died, they made a will and split everything between me and my sister (49F). The one thing that was left over was family jewelry. I didn’t want it, my sister did, so my parents specified that my sister would get the jewelry appraised up their deaths and just pay me half the value so we were even steven.
Mom died in 2013, dad died in 2021. After his death, the jewelry came up because we had to go get it during from the safe deposit box and go over the will with a lawyer. I never made a big deal out of it, I asked her about it once maybe a few months later, and she got really mad at me for bringing it up.
Maybe she was still grieving, I dunno. In my head, I was like, “this would have been one of the first things I took care of.” It just seems like the right thing to do. But whatever, I didn’t need the money so I dropped it.
Eventually I asked about it again, maybe last year, and she kind of sighed and finally got an appraisal. Now she’s paying me but I feel like an asshole for ever bringing it up. I feel like I let money get in the way of the relationship, but on the other hand she agreed to this division before either of my parents died and it seemed like she was just uninterested in fulfilling her end of the bargain.
AITA for bugging her about, and collecting, the money she agreed to pay?
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Before my (51M) parents died, they made a will and split everything between me and my sister (49F). The one thing that was left over was family jewelry. I didn’t want it, my sister did, so my parents specified that my sister would get the jewelry appraised up their deaths and just pay me half the value so we were even steven.
Mom died in 2013, dad died in 2021. After his death, the jewelry came up because we had to go get it during from the safe deposit box and go over the will with a lawyer. I never made a big deal out of it, I asked her about it once maybe a few months later, and she got really mad at me for bringing it up.
Maybe she was still grieving, I dunno. In my head, I was like, “this would have been one of the first things I took care of.” It just seems like the right thing to do. But whatever, I didn’t need the money so I dropped it.
Eventually I asked about it again, maybe last year, and she kind of sighed and finally got an appraisal. Now she’s paying me but I feel like an asshole for ever bringing it up. I feel like I let money get in the way of the relationship, but on the other hand she agreed to this division before either of my parents died and it seemed like she was just uninterested in fulfilling her end of the bargain.
AITA for bugging her about, and collecting, the money she agreed to pay?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I demanded money that my sister was nit paying me, but I probably should have chilled out because she was grieving. That would make me an asshole for focusing on money instead of her grieving process.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. How did money get in the way of your relationship here? I am not seeing it.
NTA. Your sister was trying to take the jewelry without paying you your fair share. Her efforts cost her because, of course, the jewelry has gone up in value during the intervening years.
NTA – you’re honoring your parents’ wishes.
NTA. You weren’t demanding money; you were politely reminding your sister that “I get the jewels, you get nothing” wasn’t actually what the will said. She’s acting like grief legally cancels debt. It doesn’t.