i hate to admit it, but i am seething with jealousy right now to the point that i’ve been crying on and off for a while. life is so ridiculously unfair sometimes, and that’s fine for the most part, but god damn it if it didn’t piss me off just now.
my friend is an idiot. he’s kind, but he’s a typical rich kid who hasn’t had to work or think a day in his life. last october, he leveraged his parents’ wealth to get a $375,000+ loan to start a luxury handbag company. but he spent exactly 0 time or effort into researching whether or not people wanted that style of handbags. he was pretty arrogant about it, saying that he knows art, fashion, and marketing well enough to sell them, and he was 100% confident people would want them.
well! turns out they don’t! to this day, he has sold exactly 0 of them—partially because he stopped marketing it because he “got busy”—and he’s sitting on an inventory of ~150 bags. in december, he started his monthly installments of ~$10,500/month to pay back the loan. of course, he couldn’t pay it—not even close!
so, he’s screwed, right? and honestly, he kind of deserves it, right? i mean, who spends nearly $400k on a whim like that?! he thought people would come to him, and he gave up when they didn’t. who does that?!
an only child with ultra-rich parents and no stakes; that’s who.
today he called me with great news: his parents just forgave him of his debt. they gave him all of the inventory, paid the loan back completely, and said they’ll just take it out of his inheritance. and just like that, it’s over. the call lasted all of 2 minutes because it wasn’t even that big of a deal to him—he almost expected it.
i can’t believe it. and i mean, sure, i’m happy for him, as i don’t want his life to be ruined by debt. i just think about how ridiculously hard i’ve had to work in my life, often working 2 jobs, weekends, holidays, all just to barely get by. i can’t even imagine the life he lives. his parents paid for his art school, his study abroad, his first house. and now this. he just gets to do whatever he wants. hell, he went to ART school. in ITALY. PAID FOR. and i just had to put my eggs back at the grocery store.
it was an unfriendly reminder that while i am slaving my life away, rich people are fucking around doing dumbass shit just because they can. oof.
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And then there the 12 year old brainrot playing roblox getting 2k thrown at him on stream and then acting like he earns it.
I feel for you that is very hard to witness when you have to work so hard just to get by. Does this person even know your situation because is kinda messed up they go around throwing that in your face like that. Shows no empathy. I wonder if you could have a conversation with him and tell him how uncomfortable his actions make you.
Life aint fair.
It’s unfair, yes, and I understand that it’s hard to swallow. Here’s something my sister always tells me: the only way out of despair is gratitude. I don’t mean this in a trite “just be happy” way. I mean, literally, the only way you’re going to find peace and satisfaction is to seriously reframe what you do have that others would kill for, and what you are most thankful to have. All you can do is turn it around. It doesn’t mean life isn’t unfair, but to many people in this world, YOU are the person who has everything. It’s not to scold you, it’s to help you examine where you are lucky and to eventually find a peace with what you have been given.
Hey OP, whenever I feel jealous—which happens, because we’re all human—I remind myself that what I might be lacking and someone else has is just a part of life. And it works both ways… the same person I’m feeling jealous of probably has something they’re jealous of in me too. Whether it’s family, friends, a partner—whatever it may be—I can almost guarantee that if you’re feeling envy, they are too.
Money is great, but it doesn’t fix everything. There are plenty of wealthy people out there who are deeply miserable so remember that when you feel jealously creeping in.
My aunt married rich. He is so stingy he has cause psychological harm to his entire family.
I know it’s hard to hear this when you’ve just seen big money thrown down an endless drain, but at the end of the day you’re a much better person than he will ever be. Husband and I were in foreclosure and didn’t get a red cent from his family, according to his parents he was a “different” case than his sisters. These sisters? College paid, work checks even when they didn’t work, rent/utilities paid, one sisters home paid for in excess of 700k, I could put myself to sleep with the list of handouts. But at the end of the day, husband and I are way more financially stable than any of them AND can do what we damn well please without any assistance. These people who need bailouts at every turn in life will never prosper, and he’ll squander that inheritance. Be careful in a few years, he may reach out for another sum of money from you and other friends!
When I feel down I remember that I live better now than the king and queens and pharaohs of the past. A hot shower, a pillow and sheets, an eclair
Dude all my friends parents are still alive getting early inheritance… One person $1mill.
Me…I know I won’t get anything at all. It’s fine…it just sucks when they all do things without me that I can’t afford.
I don’t blame anyone… It’s just how the cookie crumbled.
To make matters worse what I should have inherited my brother did… About 500k when I was 20…
My mentally unstable aunt committed such… Left the family money to him instead of my father…it was all Grandma’s money because my aunt never worked.
I’m the end… All out of my control. I control what I can and I’m doing fantastic as a self made father and husband. I take pride in it… It’d just be nice to have the safety net… House paid off or whatever…
Anyways got this off my chest too
It has absolutely nothing to do with you lol. My friend complains about finances sometimes while his parents paid for his wedding and college and bought him his dream car after school. I used to resent him for it but eventually just figured fuck it. We all got different paths. Keep working hard.
I’m not gonna offer any advice, I just want to say I’m sorry. It sucks. That much money would be life changing for a lot of us, and watching someone else throw it away like that is frustrating and depressing. Your feelings are entirely valid.
Yup. That’s life for ya. The rich life grand and relatively easy lives while the rest of us suffer and slowly drown. Some of us manage to hold on, but others sink.
Anyway, I was kinda pissed in college because I was one of the only kids taking out loans to pay his way through while many of my friends and other people had their parents paying or helping to pay for their college. Then, these people had the nerve to complain to me about the small amount of debt they had while my debt was in the 6 figures. Life isn’t fair.
Not all people are born or created equal, contrary to what people or documents say or will tell you. Some people are born rich, some born poor. Some people are discriminated against for being born a certain way while others never know discrimination. Life is hard.
Being jealous won’t do you any good though. Just be proud that you’re working hard to earn everything you have and pay down what you have, and you weren’t handed everything like a spoiled, entitled, rich little snotbag.
I’d take your path any day over his. You can feel good about your accomplishments because they are actually yours. Stop being jealous, ugly wasteful emotion.
Life sucks ass. 9 months ago, my wife, two daughters, and I were living in a hotel room. We just finally got another apartment last month. Never before had I wished to just have another room. I took it all for granted. I’m grateful that my kids have a room that’s seperate from us again.
It’s fine to feel jealous mate. The world is unfair and you have every right to just crumble sometimes under the weight of it all.
Just remember to pick yourself back up and continue forward anyway, not for anyone else… just for yourself. You’re handed the cards you were dealt, might as well play your hand to its fullest in spite of it all.
And as much as you’re caught up in all these feelings right now, you have to keep in mind this one simple question , “Do I prioritize these feelings of mine over the person and their circumstances?”.
You have the right to pull back to preserve your peace, but if your idea of peace includes that person… you just have to swallow your pride sometimes.
It hurts and it stings, and sometimes they do things that make you want to scream at them about how privileged they are, you just have to remember that they’re still human and they’re still your friend.
Comparison is the thief of joy. There are probably aspects of his life that are shit compared to you just like vice versa. If you constantly focus on what you don’t have and what others do, you’re never going to be happy.
I don’t think you should compare your life to his situation. He might make stupid decisions and is lucky enough to have wealthy parents, but it doesn’t impact your life. You are wasting energy getting twisted over things beyond your control and only making things harder for yourself
Comparison is the thief of joy. Be happy for your friend and try to focus on your life. Your life has not become harder just because someone else’s life has gotten easier.
Here’s my tidbit tip to counter your jealousy.
I used to be jealous like you. I have zero parents and aunts and uncles who doesn’t give a fvck about me.
Life will bless with so many things. What is it that your friend doesn’t have that have?
For example:
A supportive family
Little to zero debt
Have survival skills
Can survive by yourself without your parents
Wisdom
Knowledge about the world
Love from friends and family
If your friend’s parents are gone. Do you think he’ll survive on his own?
Some rich kids are miserable AF. I prefer being middle class or lower middle. Enough problems on my plate.
So am I man!
it’s really bad of me but i just can’t be friends with people like that. i get too jealous and angry
Channel your jealousy into asking him to take you on expensive trips to Italy
Don’t know why you are jealous. The guy just lost $375K. You seem to be unhappy with the thought that why didn’t i have that much money to lose. Be happy bro that you are not that stupid
I’d love to offer perspective and talk sincerely.
Will DM you.
I would stop being friends with that person or extremely distance myself. It’s nicer to be friends with people who understand struggle and choose to make themselves successful. I love being friends with my kind of people. It makes their accomplishments so much fun to be a part of.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Life is not fair. It sucks but it is what it is.
U shouldn’t be friends w people like that bc u are gonna be so jealous all the time instead of focusing on ur own life
Personally, I don’t find anything admirable that someone will have such low grit that will have absolutely no drive to try and make something work. It’s okay to fail. And it can be admirable still even if someone fails. As long as they can show that they did their best but it just didn’t work out.
But to absolutely not even try to make something work and then expect a bail out – I don’t know. To me there’s nothing about that that I personally find admirable. Seems like a chicken cop out.
Ignore all the people saying “comparison is the thief of joy” and “others have it worse than you” and ” be the bigger person” blah blah blah… Wealth inequality is the root of all evil!! I’ve broken 19 bones- does that mean I should be happy because some people have broken 20 or more? That somehow my pain doesn’t count? Your “friend” is disgusting and so are their parents. Ask any poor person what they’d do if they won the lottery, and they say ” help my family and friends and charities.” Ask a rich person? I did. And they said “get a private jet.”
it’s not crazy to feel some kind of way about somebody else having a leg up in the world that you will never have, especially when you know it’s completely an accident of fate – you were born to your family, they were born to their extremely rich family
ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy) might be helpful for you in the same ways that it had been helpful for me ❤️ there are plenty of practices you can do on your own with related books.
What’s for you will be. No need in ever being jealous especially because the only one that carries that is you. Accept you and your path. Live YOUR life ❤️🩹
Nobody cares, work harder
I know this is cold comfort compared to the practical benefits (and luxury) of knowing your future is secure, but honestly, I would rather die than be one of these useless people. Living life without goals or dreams sounds like a nightmare. You might as well be a paramecium responding to stimuli… there is light, there is warmth, there is [whatever]. I was put on earth to strive towards my goals and become the person I want to be, and it sucks that these wastes of resources exist, but at least I’ve got something in me other than mindless hunger.
I don’t actually think it is jealousy that is upsetting you. It’s your friend’s attitude and complete lack of awareness or empathy. If he really is your friend he wouldn’t tell you about it or throw it in your face because he would know how much money that would be to you, how much of a difference it would make and how hard you have worked. I think that’s what would upset me the most and tbh I would struggle being friends with someone so out of touch and ungrateful.
Money can’t buy taste or intelligence so the super rich often have really stupid kids. That’s the price you pay for being rich. Their parents usually send them away to boarding school early or leave them with a nanny for extended periods of time. It sounds like a mostly shite life but if you put money all over it, it makes it look better.
so do you think he is happy about this?
Op, there is nothing to feel jealous of. I have a best friend that is similar to this
Your friend has learnt absolutely nothing from this experience and is bound to repeat this mistake again, the best thing about life is that it’s a learning game and when no repercussions come from shitty choices they are unfortunately bound to be made again.
Life isn’t fair , it isn’t suppose to be I guess and considering how tough everybody is doing it seeing someone get thrown 300K for nothing hurts, but try just focus on you xx
Don’t get upset at your friend, get upset at the huge and growing socioeconomic gap in the U.S. and at the politicians who could try to do something about it, but don’t.
i think most of are jealous of rich people, is ok its normal but don’t let it get to you think of all the billions of people who would feel the same way you are feeling if you were friends with them , think about it most people in the world has never been in an airplane.
What you are feeling is envy not jealousy.
Life rule #1: The only difference between you and every other person is your parents.
What you going to do with that for the rest of your life depends on you though.
Life is fair, it’s equally unfair for everyone.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
jeff bezos got $200,000 as a seed money from his parents. the rich has a lot more advantage than the rest of us.
I can only say one thing.
You couldn’t have those parents and that money without also having that disgraceful attitude.
They’re like literally correlated.
You would literally have to be a weak, whimsy person.
There’d be no way around it.
Also, some art schools in Italy are not that expensive, some people even get grants for it if they don’t have much money, you can totally do it later in life if it’s an experience you want. It might be worth it looking into it if you have some kind of job you can do remote. It might not be the ‘fancy’ one but there’s still valid options
Lots of love, life definitely is unfair and it’s only going to get worse unless we put our effort towards money redistribution, but it’s still pretty awesome ❤️
I hear ya. Life really does suck a good bit of the time, and the worst people seem to have the best luck.
Personally, I’d distance myself from that “friend”. It’s better for your mental health not the hear what he has going on in his life.
You didn’t listen to what he said, his parents told him they were forgiving the debt but were taking it out of his inheritance!
This mean he will get $375k less when they pass and others in their will will get the full amount.
I just got my student loans paid off , but it’s cause my mom died and had life insurance.
Que sera sera
I didn’t need to read past the title, and I’m already jealous and on your side too!!! lol
Well, that’s one way to earn money. Tax-free.
I think he just learned from his parents.