Why can I only finish when my girl gives me oral?

r/

I’ve only had sex with two people, my ex girlfriend and my new girlfriend. When I had sex with my ex girlfriend, she wasn’t too great at oral and I usually would never finish that way and I’d finish through actual sex.

My new girlfriend, who is amazing and 10x more beautiful then the last, I haven’t been able to finish through sex and only through oral, her vagina feels much better then my ex’s and she is also much better at sex and is a better fit for me since my ex was a lot taller then me and it limited our positions. This new girl is about the same height as me. But she is also, SUPER good at oral, like insanely good with her mouth.

Why can’t I ejaculated during regular sex? Is this a health problem? I know this usually wouldn’t be bad since women like men who last long, but my girlfriend feels like it’s her fault and it’s making her sad, she was even more disappointed when she asked me if I have came from having sex before and I said yes.

I don’t know if this is related, but with my ex I masturbated once or twice daily because I was never really happy with our relationship but with my current girlfriend I haven’t masturbated since we started dating (3 weeks ago)

Someone help!

Comments

  1. Fun_Window_9829 Avatar

    It’s just about how simulated you are, have you tried different positions too? I’ve been with guys who can go on forever in one position but then bust almost immediately in others, y’all should experiment!

  2. Flimsy-Climate-9939 Avatar

    Give it some time, you need to get accustomed to the new GF, her body, which position pleasure you more etc.
    For me anxiety (new person, expectations etc) and condoms were limiting factors early on.

    For the anxiety part, it soons goes away, after you have a few good sessions with the new GF. Sometimes early in new relationships is build myself up into what I’d do and follow the position that was 100% guaranteed that I found hot and would make me finish.

  3. Afflictedbythebald Avatar

    If you are worried about this while engaging with your partner the chances are this is more performance anxiety rather than a physical issue.
    The brain is powerful and will fuck a lot of things up purely by thoughts.
    Try to relax, communicate with your partner and enjoy yourself.

  4. SpiritedCaramel9256 Avatar

    Bro’s not in love, he’s in throat! Jokes aside, performance anxiety and sensory focus are real things, oral just hits that primal reset button.

  5. BBrouss95 Avatar

    The average Redditors differential diagnosis is always performance issues. Lol. This isn’t the dude’s first time. If you’re uncircumcised and can’t come from penetrative vagina or anal sex, but can come from oral sex, and you haven’t masturbate in some time, not sure what to tell you.

  6. BBrouss95 Avatar

    The average Redditors differential diagnosis is always performance issues. Lol. This isn’t the dude’s first time. If you’re uncircumcised and can’t come from penetrative vagina or anal sex, but can come from oral sex, and you haven’t masturbated in some time, not sure what to tell you.

  7. bunny_387 Avatar

    Maybe you’ll have feel less pressure if you stop comparing your sex life with her to your sex life with your ex? And as a result you might have better luck finishing with sex

  8. vydgj42 Avatar

    Find positions that do better for you. Any medication or other change between the two?

  9. vydgj42 Avatar

    Find positions that do better for you. Any medication or other change between the two?

  10. vydgj42 Avatar

    Find positions that do better for you. Any medication or other change between the two?

  11. 801chris Avatar

    Does she finish? Are you sure?

    You’re not orgasming because you’re not really connected with her. She isn’t your automatic fleshlight.

  12. 801chris Avatar

    Does she finish? Are you sure? You’re not orgasming because you’re not really connected with her. She isn’t your automatic fleshlight.

  13. NachoPeroni Avatar

    3 weeks only? Give it more time (a lot more) to see the true dynamics of the relationship.

  14. njhowe88 Avatar

    You used to beat off 1 or 2 times a day? Jesus, I do 1 or 2 times a week, and im not sexually active.

    Hmm I dunno why you can’t finish vaginally. Are you intoxicated in any way?

  15. TwistedLuck13 Avatar

    Try more positions, reassure her that you think she is gorgeous and the absolute best at oral.
    Sometimes we tend to get in our own head too much.

  16. crooKkTV Avatar

    “That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!”

    Good on ya!

  17. ShowBobsPlzz Avatar

    Enjoy the stamina dude, im 37 and its a crap shoot whether or not i last 2 minutes or 15 minutes. As long as you are pleasing your lady im sure she doesnt mind finishing the job with her mouth.

  18. Ok-Mammoth-5758 Avatar

    I have the opposite issue. Takes me forever to blow when she gives me head. And yes, she’s very good at it

  19. Greedy_Reality_7353 Avatar

    So I have had this problem at various stages of my life. I’m married now but previous partners would always think it was them when it would happen. A few things.

    1. Detox from jerking off entirely for a while. You have likely desensitized yourself. If you’re very sexually actively give it a week off and let the tension build.
    2. Stop thinking so much/worrying during sex. If you are worried about finishing, you won’t. You are getting in your head. Just be in the moment.
    3. Stop jerking off.
  20. kaanrifis Avatar

    Too much pressure

  21. pandagate Avatar

    Stop tugging it fam

  22. jtanberg Avatar

    What type of birth control is being used? I had sex with a female who had an IUD and I could never cum. Once she had that removed it was on like donkey kong

  23. Not_The_Real_Odin Avatar

    Have you considered that it may be psychological? This is anecdotal, but an individual close to me grew up in a hyper-religious household where they were lied to about many things involving sex. As a result, they have a deep-rooted fear of accidentally getting their partner pregnant, which manifests as an inability to finish from intercourse.

  24. ArtificialRubber Avatar

    Now if we could combine these two together…?

    But real talk, reassurance for your girlfriend for one. It sounds like you two need to play around with what “works” try new positions. Or just new things in the bedroom in general Roleplay is an example.

    Just tell your girlfriend her mouth is just godly.

  25. malcolmrey Avatar

    I honestly have read the title as “Why can I only fish when my girl gives me oral?” and was very intrigued.

  26. gigashadowwolf Avatar

    Honestly, it happens.

    As unintuitive as it seems, sometimes I have a more difficult time cumming from GREAT sex than from crappy mundane sex.

    Like I generally last longer the more time we spend on foreplay and the more turned on I am.

    My wife has this thing that sometimes happens when she’s REALLY into it where her vagina literally starts squeezing and milking me, like almost as if there were a hand in her and it were stroking up and down even if I am not thrusting at all. I have no idea how she does it, and neither does she, she has a fair amount of muscle control there, but not like this, it’s entirely involuntary. The only thing she can control about it when it happens is she can vary how hard it squeezes. It’s just about the most amazing sensation ever. Like bliss on a whole different level.

    For some reason (it’s both a curse and a blessing) when she does this, I am often unable to cum myself. I like that I don’t, because the sensation is so amazing that I want it to last and I don’t want to be out of the game as quickly as I would expect it to take me out, but after a while I just want to nut. She’ll stop doing it after a while when she’s not quite as aroused anymore, but I still won’t be able to cum after.

    But if I wait about an hour, and try to take care of it myself, it will be almost immediate even though the sensation is nowhere near as good and I am nowhere near as turned on.

  27. SoftwareDifficult186 Avatar

    Maybe thinking about or comparing to ex too much? Don’t pressure yourself

  28. IcySetting2024 Avatar

    Mate, only came here to say how off putting it is to read how much you compare your poor ex to this new gf and essentially called her ugly and shite at sex in a million different ways. Not cool.