Growing up my dad was a gambling addict, he would go out and spend money and come home angry. He would hit us (me and my sister and my mom) my mom stayed because at the time it was what you did stay together for the kids. I moved out of home at 16 because of all the fighting. I moved in with a guy that had me on drugs and broke my nose, my dad came to my rescue over and over and stupid me kept going back. I was angry with my dad with how my child hood was, so I asked for him to sign emancipation papers saying he wasn’t my dad anymore. I was still 16 at this time he promised me he would change if I didn’t go through with it so I gave him some time to change. He went to doctors and counselors and he had changed no more gambling no more hurting us. He worked his entire life broke his neck working and had to have surgery during the surgery he had a stroke and he was left as an incomplete quadriplegic, he could walk but he had no feeling from the elbows down. He had to use a wheel chair for the better part of a year and one day he decided he was going to walk and nothing was stopping him. He started using cane’s to get around and he continued working(that’s what he wanted). He was angry and gambling again but not violent he was to handicapped and couldn’t do things or he would fall and get hurt but he would scream and yell and threaten people. One day he went in his garage and tried to cut his own arm off he figured he would bleed to death before anyone found him but half way into his arm he realized how stupid it was and he called 911. He went on all sorts of meds to try to help his mental health and it seemed to work he went back to no gambling and no fighting. He regularly went to a doctor because he was handicapped they found a mass in his thyroid growing and did biopsies on it, it was not cancerous but he was struggling to swallow so they were going to remove it.
We found out in this time my fiances dad had a mass growing on his liver it was stage 3 liver cancer. we were devastated but we were told we should have at least 6 months if not more depending on how treatment went. He was discharged from the hospital and sent home, that night his heart failed and he passed away 💔.
My dad had his surgery booked we were all happy it wasnt cancer and that it was going to be removed, but we were all scares because last time he had a surgery he had a stroke. The surgery date was getting closer and he had to have a full physical to make sure he was going to be okay for surgery, every thing came back fine. He got a flu and was a little sick but still had 2 weeks(14 day) before surgery, so he figured he would be over the flu he had in time for surgery. 13 days before my dad’s surgery my fiance father10 days before surgery my mom told us that he said to her if he ever dies to sell the house and move into some thing cheap that easier for her to afford and take care of. 7 days before surgery he was still a little sick but seemed better then he was. he told us he wanted to cancel his surgery because he had a bad feeling and we convinced his to wait and if he was still sick a few days before then to cancel it. 3 days before his surgery, my mom and dad were at home and he still had a flu and my mom was starring to feel sick to, she went to bed earlier and woke up around 10:30 pm and heard him walking around and grumbling that he was still sick she didn’t think much of him grumbling to himself, she got out of bed and said come to bed your tired and still sick and we can cancel your surgery tomorrow. He sat down on the bed with her and fell over backwards on the bed and his heart had stopped, no breathing no heart beat. My mom called 911 they got her to drag him off the bed and do cpr, but because of his previous neck surgery she couldn’t tip his head back very far to blow air into him. It took 7 minutes for the ambulance to get there. My mom called me and told me she thinks my dad died I called my sister probably 1400 times while driving to her house to wake her up I told he what was happening my mom called me and said omg they got his heart started they were going to put him in the ambulance. I’ve never driven so fast in my life, we were almost to her house when my phone rang his heart stopped just as they were getting him in the ambulance. The put a machine on him called the Lucas(it does chest compressions) just as we were pulling up the ambulance was driving away. So we drove to the hospital I ran inside so fast I needed to be with my mom. They had the room open and we could see them working on my dad. 45 minutes they worked and got his heart started. They stabilized him and sent him to get a ct scan and xrays. They broke his ribs trying to start his heart. But we weren’t going to get the ct results till the next day, the doctors all told us yo go home and try to sleep they had him stable and we would know more tomorrow. My sister went to sleep with my mom at her house and I had dogs I had to let outside. By this time it was 4 am, around 1030 thr next morning the doctor called and said we needed to talk about the results at 12. We came in and spent time just sitting around and holding his hand and kissing him(he would have been so annoyed at that but he still loved us). The doctor came in and told us his brain was bleeding and he had no brain activity(he was brain dead) and the only thing keeping his body alive was the machine breathing for him. He made us promise if it was ever like this we wouldn’t keep him here hooked up to machines incase he was still in there. He didn’t want to live like that. The doctor told us we can leave him like that as long as we needed to. We spent the day with him till about 4:30, all of a sudden we all looked at him and we looked at each other and my mom asked how long we were going to force him to be here. We all cried and told him how much we loved him and that we would miss him so much. We asked a nurse to give him pain meds to make sure he didn’t feel anything and we all stayed together and held his hand while the doctors disconnected his ventilator. I watched my daddies body dying knowing he was already gone. I’m so happy you were my dad I wouldn’t have it any other way I’m glad we didn’t fight anymore for the last 7 years. I miss you so much dad I have a voicemail from you on the phone that I sit and listen to over and over again. My heart breaks for you daddy I don’t want to live a life without you in it. Your grand kids miss you. I MISS YOU. Sorry for the long post I just haven’t talked to any one about this. I need to be the strong one, the one who takes care of my sister and mom I can’t cry in front of them.