I’m a man, and when I was 6 I was playing house and told my little cousin to touch my man boobs as a joke, he was 4. I don’t know if he knows I was joking, and I could’ve traumatised him. I’ve never ever told this to anyone, it’s my darkest secret. I regret it to this day. Anytime im having fun it just pops in my head and ruins my mood, I can’t imagine how he felt.
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please see a therapist if you’re not already. what you did may have been inappropriate, but you were a child. you cannot hold child you to the moral standards you have as an adult. you did not know any better. and hating yourself for something you did in childhood is not going to erase what happened.