ive stopped trying to earn my mothers love

r/

She’s ignored me my whole life, and only cared about my younger brother. For years I’ve done all I can for her, buying gifts, writing cards, watching things, going out, but I cannot compete with her beloved little boy who sits around and does nothing (and literally says awful things about her when we go to stay with our dad).

I have tried so hard and it’s got me nowhere, so I’m just going to stop trying. Ive stopped going out with her, and doing things with her, because why should I bother with her if she doesn’t want to bother with me?

A couple weeks ago she had a meltdown about me and my brother hating her, and quite frankly, it’s hard to like her anymore. She never thinks of me, and I’m just an accessory to her life, so why should she get my respect? She’s never cared about me.

I cant wait to move out and go no contact.

Comments

  1. Thin_Rip8995 Avatar

    good—stop bleeding for someone who doesn’t flinch

    you don’t owe her closeness just because she gave birth to you
    love isn’t earned by overgiving, it’s given—or not
    and when it’s not? you walk

    her meltdown wasn’t guilt—it was losing control
    people like that don’t want relationships
    they want loyalty without effort

    go no contact. build your own peace.
    family isn’t who you’re born to
    it’s who shows up and treats you like you matter

  2. doreen_what Avatar

    im really sorry, honestly. you did the right thing. the fact that youre getting detached is good. itll hurt you less from now on. how old are you if i may ask? she took you for granted your entire life, she doesn’t deserve your effort. you tried, she failed. its okay. and why do you think your brother hates her?