hi everyone,
my partner (27M) and I (23F) have been together for a few months. we’ve tried to have penetrative sex a few times over the past few days and have had difficulty with him fitting in. for reference, we’re both virgins and have basically had no sexual experience before each other. he is really big (extra large condoms barely fit) and so every time we try to go to penetration, it feels like there’s a block that’s stopping it.
he’s able to finger me with 1 finger comfortably but 2 fingers brings on a bit of pain, but manageable. is this normal given that we’re both virgins?
TL;DR
partner and i are both virgins but have issues with penetrative sex
Comments
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There is nothing wrong with going to a gynecologist for a checkup.
It’s probably something that will improve with practice though
Get a dildo smaller than him. Play with it on your own or together, whatever you’re comfortable with.
You have to RELAX!!! That’s a simple answer but I’m serious. If you’re nervous or tense your bits are gonna reflect that, staying dry or even tightening. Go slow, use water based lube (or saliva) and take your time!
Inserting anything up there is typically going to feel different no matter what, that’s why people slowly progress fingers. No matter how excited you are, rushing us only going to make it worse. Good luck!
take it slow, it definitely does help if you’re wet. maybe grab some toys to help? a vibrator/dildo? if he’s truly that big you’re gonna have to work your way up to it. vaginas do stretch so remember that. you’re also a virgin, so it’s going to be painful since it sounds like you’re tight. but again take it slow and stop if you need too. i’m sure you guys will get the feel of it and work something out. if you really feel the need too- go see a gynecologist. they can talk you through this kind of stuff.
It’s normal to face challenges with first-time sex, especially as virgins. Focus on relaxation, foreplay, and using lubrication to make things more comfortable. Take it slow, communicate openly, and be patient as your body adjusts. If discomfort continues, consider consulting a doctor. Prioritize mutual comfort and enjoy the process without rushing or pressure.