So me (23m) and my bf (22m) have been dating for about 4 months now and for the past month or two I have noticed that he has been avoiding me and ignoring me. Just today me and him were playing a game and he died on it and left the call and then got game and got off and I later see him on vrchat (yes it is a online relationship) and his group and status were “hate”. I message him saying stuff like I love him and I never want to lose him because I felt like I did something bad and I was thinking about hurting myself. He then joins my world after about 30 minutes. He clearly read my message I sent him on discord and he never asked if I was ok. He then went to play with a friend rather than checking on me and making sure I was ok. What should I do or ask him?????
TL;DR:
I’ve been dating my online boyfriend for 4 months, but lately he’s been distant and ignoring me. Today, after a small in-game issue, he left abruptly, changed his status to “hate,” and ignored my emotional message. He later joined my world but didn’t check if I was okay and went to play with someone else instead. I’m hurt and don’t know what to do or ask him.
Comments
If this is how he’s acting/treating you 4 months in, he is not going to start treating you better. This should be the honeymoon phase. You deserve better. He doesn’t seem to care about you very much, and if he does he needs to start showing it.
This isn’t a relationship – it’s over and he hasn’t told you. But please stop saying to anyone within a relationship that you are thinking of hurting yourself if they don’t contact you. This may be the reason he hasn’t told you it’s over and it’s manipulation. You should never put that on someone else it’s not fair. If you are ever thinking of hurting yourself tell a friend, a relation, phone the Samaritans or a helpline. But do not use it to emotionally blackmail someone. It’s time to focus on yourself, get the help you need and set your life up where men do not control how you feel. You are too young for this – focus on friends and your mental health.