I’m (F37) really struggling right now and I need to know if I’m being overly sensitive or if my feelings are valid. My husband (M34) took his daughter (my stepdaughter) dress shopping, bought her shoes, and helped her get ready for her 3rd-grade father-daughter dance. It was sweet to see, but at the same time, it really hit me hard.
My oldest daughter (from a previous relationship—her dad isn’t in the picture at all) is getting ready for her senior prom, and she’s having to buy her own dress, shoes, and everything else that comes with it. I’ve tried to help where I can, but with my health issues, I’ve been trying to get disability (which I’ve recently given up on) and am now looking for whatever work I can find. The $40/week I get in child support doesn’t stretch very far, and it just feels like I’m failing her.
My husband hasn’t offered to help her, hasn’t asked how she’s managing, nothing. And it’s breaking my heart. I’m trying not to compare, but when I see how willing and involved he is with his daughter’s big moment—even at just 9 years old—it makes the complete absence of support for my daughter’s huge milestone feel like a slap in the face.
We’ve been having issues in our relationship already, to the point where I don’t even know if this is salvageable anymore. But this just feels like the final straw. I don’t want to make a mountain out of a molehill, but I can’t shake the feeling that this is about more than just a dress.
Am I overreacting?