Dubai chocolate is disgusting

I’d seen all the viral videos on YouTube going on and on about how amazing Dubai chocolate is. They made it sound like some kind of exotic, once-in-a-lifetime experience. So rich. So decadent. So unlike anything else in the world.

So imagine my delight when, after months of hearing about this foreign treat, I spotted it in my local shop. It was proudly displayed right in the centre of the counter like it was the crown jewel of chocolate. And of course, the price matched the hype. Eight euro. For one bar. The price made me want it more. Obviously.

I told myself it was a one-off treat. A little splurge. And for reasons I can’t explain, I bought not one but two of the bloody things.

When I got home, I set it down on the table like I was preparing for some sacred moment. I wanted to enjoy it properly. I opened the wrapper slowly, ready to experience the magic.

Took the first bite.

WTF.

My first thought was, this is disgusting. But I figured maybe the taste would develop, you know? Sometimes fancy chocolate starts slow. So I took another bite.

Nope. Just as bad. Worse, even. It tasted like someone had taken chocolate and mixed it with sawdust. Genuinely vile. I kept saying to myself, this is disgusting, and yet… I still finished the bar. Purely out of stubbornness. But I couldn’t bring myself to touch the second one.

I would honestly prefer any other chocolate. Even those awful chocolate coins from Christmas. It’s so overrated it should come with a warning label.

Never again.