Like the title says. I was encouraged to apply for a job by the companies Talent Acquisition head for a job with a yearly salary of about US$110,000. I have the necessary experience and skills, and it’s more or less in the field I want.
But it’s not what I want to do, and I don’t know how happy I would be doing it.
I’ve busted my ass working since I was 18, was in the military for 10 years.
Now the wife and I are trying for kids.
I’d rather have a simpler life that allowed me more time with my family. But with this job I’d be able to provide financial security for them. I’d make over a million dollars by 2040, which is insane to think about when most of my life I’ve lived paycheck to paycheck.
But I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be happy doing it.
To be honest, after so many years, my body broken and permanently damaged., I just want to relax. I want to be a househusband. Stay home and clean and take care of my baby. Go grocery shopping and make dinner. My wife wants to work and I can still contribute with my VA disability check.
Wife and I are doing just fine now, and we’d be fine with a kid. Not super laid back, but fine.
I don’t know guys. I’m struggling. Happiness or mine and my families security?
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I think that you know the answer already.
What about the job makes you think you’ll not like it
This is tough. Money isn’t everything. Could you quit in a couple years and go back to a similar old job?
I would take the better paying job while you can. You do not have kids yet, and are from what I understood relatively young, and busting your ass for money will not become easier the older you get, only harder, especially if you already feel the damage on your body now.
I would take the 100K+ job for some time, it does not have to be a long time, but enough to maybe build up a nice cushion and gain experience in that position, and when kid(s) come you can take the easier job, or something else in that field that might not be as demanding, yet would still be a financial step up from where you are now.
You are a family man. You made the choice of outing family first when you said “I do”.
It doesn’t matter if you are not happy, you provide your family with everything they deserve.
If you don’t have a bunch of years of higher income with a maxed 401(k), you will be eating dog kibble at age 70.
ALWAYS maximize your earning (imo)
The imposter syndrome hitting?
A difficult job gets easier as you learn the tricks and twists. Jobs exist because people are willing to pay you to do something they can’t or don’t want to do so… sometimes they suck a little? But if you can become a well respected expert and implement your own tools and practices to make the work flow easier, I’m thinking it might be worth the shot
Have you been through the interview process? If not, keep in mind its just as much of an opportunity for you to learn about the role as it is for the hiring team to learn about you.
Stop being lazy and selfish and take the job. You’ve got a family to provide for.
This seems easy.
You’ll be working from a desk, take the money. Trust me, the “happiness” will dilute when you can’t afford a new boiler or are stuck in a crap resort because it was on offer.
You can always go backwards in career once you’ve earnt the money. It’s harder to up your money when you need it.
Also this is your starting salary, even if you got a standard 4% payrise for inflation every 2 years (I am being conservative) then your salary in ten years will be $133,831-ish per annum.
You will make more than a million dollars over those ten years, more likely $1.2m. Secondly this doesn’t account for upskilling, benefits or promotions.
I could understand if one role was 9 months away from home and the other was SAHD but its a TA role – not exactly intense physical scarifice – if you cant be bothered, that’s fine. But it’d take the money and save it. That disposable income, into a roth IRA or a SP500 tracker etc and you’ll be set.
Dunno the tax you’d pay but if you could save $2000pcm for that decade @ 5% return you have $313,858.58!!
Then you can step off the gas and relax!
Likewise, it usually never works out for the guy to be a SAHD, the wife ends up resenting the guy, not always but yeah, I wouldn’t risk that happening.
you should do both. a little temporary suffering for long-term gain: take the job and commit to it for a year. if after a year you don’t like it, look for a gig more your speed. here’s the kicker: you will be looking for the new job with a six figure salary as your current income, and future opportunities will have to at least come close to matching that.
most importantly: talk to your wife about this. if it’s more work, she’ll see you less and have to pick up more of the household duties.
10 years military – if ur body is broken u should be applying for VA disability benefits – as far as the new job – as someone mentioned u need to think about what you’ll have at retirement-
It sucks if you don’t want to, but as a family man you need to earn. Don’t fool yourself with abstractions like ‘happiness’ anyway. ‘Happiness’ isn’t a destination, it’s an emotion meant to lead you forward into what is best for you, and your family if you’re a guy, as that responsibility falls on you.
You wont be able to chose the correct path here friend. You will be damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
No one can tell you to take a job that sounds like you’d hate? And then I think why even apply.
The most critical thing you didn’t talk about is what you make currently.
If you guys can live well below your means and still invest into a 401k for retirement then it’s feasible.
Depending on your disability rating. If you’re 100% that’s probably a few thousand dollars. The problem with your disability much like my husbands VA disability is…. if you pass away it dies with you!
So it’s not reliable income.
Can you guys put NO LESS than 23.5k into a 401k a year? As well as save up 3-6 months for emergency savings!
Your retirement isn’t out retirements. How you wish to live in your elder years is up to you!
But before you start having kids. I’d ensure that you are starting to heavily invest.
Once you learn to live without that cash the easier it’ll be!
why would you make $1 million by 2040, seems completely made up by that company. I wouldn’t believe it.
You’re going to pick your hard and pick your enjoyment- you can feel mediocre about your career and have financial security or feel amazing about your career and worry about money.
The choice is yours.
You don’t have to do that job forever. You don’t even have a kid yet. Do it for a while and see how you feel.