Feeling much resentment

Feeling a ton of resentment

I’m becoming weary of my husband. We’ve been married ten years and hes a good man but he’s been unable to properly and whole heartedly provide. Yes he can bring in a check which he thinks is all he needs to do but he cannot lead us. We’ve been ten years without a stable home, bouncing from crap apartment to apartment. Ten years and we’ve skipped a wedding, and a whole bunch of traditional milestones. Not only does he have financial control for big expenses but the little ones also. I have to ask when I want new shoes, new clothes, hair, any grooming or up/keep, certain meals. Then if he agrees he then says “okay get it whatever, you don’t need it but get it” So then I go behind his back and buy what I need and keep it under wraps. He never said to me “of course, it’s $50 shoes, whatever you want.” I have to ask like a child.

Like I never had a problem before but I feel like one day I grew up and saw all of the toxicity. He comes home and complains how he’s tired and can’t give me any conversation besides his raunchy jokes he had with his male coworkers. My breaking point was today when I packed a gift for an event only he was invited to, and and left a card next to it and said here you wrote the card and he said “what do I write inside?” Like are you ducking kidding me?? He’s like a man child it’s so tiring and then he wonders why I don’t want sex. He doesn’t even seem like he likes me, let alone loves me.

Tl;dr feeling resentment of ten year marriage