When I was 16 I stuck a ballpoint pen up my dick. It was a fancy one that’s thicker than normal pens, maybe 7 or 8mm wide. I slowly but surely worked it a short way into my dick, but then realized it didn’t want to slide back out.
The back of it was a separate plastic piece that screwed on, and apparently it was a tiny bit wider than the rest of the pen, so there was a little edge where they met. It was barely noticeable while looking at it, but inside of a wingwang that edge had some serious staying power.
I considered going to the doctor, but I couldn’t drive at that point, and I had no idea how to get my parents to take me without explaining what happened, which I thought would probably end in violence or me being kicked out and left to die or something. I eventually ended up yanking hard on the pen and it came out.
It hurt and made my dick bleed, 3/10, wouldn’t do again, and generally wouldn’t recommend it to anyone else.
Hooked up with a 40-ish man when i was 16.
Thankfully i looked younger than that so he felt uncomfortable and changed his mind.
It was because of the anti-schizo meds i was taking, i don’t know what’s in them but all the meds of this type would cause me to be INSANELY horny 24/7.
I don’t take them anymore
I think there is a nude someone still out there of me.
I’ve fallen for a fake account in instagram, yet this scammer might even have been dumber than me. Because after only one full body pic threatened me to tell my family and friends. Now that is scary, yet I was a 22 y/o white man with no shame of his body(maybe my chubby belly but who cares)
I blocked the scammer and never heard a thing. This is now 3 years ago. Also, my family never received a photo and if they did, all I had to was explain I’ve been a dumb fuck. Would have been fucked up, but not the end of the world. So I’ve decided that if I ever get famous and they try to use it on me, I’d say that is photoshopped.
I’m a dumbfuck but that might have been the worst scammer I’ve ever seen. XD
My ex friends (this happened after the end of our friendship) babies mom was at my house and she started grinding in me but she didn’t want to have sex. She was on her period and claimed ‘i could make you up cum without penetration’. Obviously she wasn’t making anything happen besides my dick be coming raw, I asked her for head, she said no but i could cum on her face. So I took sat her on the ground and ejaculated all over her face.
I had just got back from military training and didn’t nut for almost a month. She was surprised and covered and as she was licking her lips, i kissed her. I was caught in the moment but i tasted my own cum
Almost gave my roommate a concussion. Allow me to explain.
I used to do a ton of drugs, and while on an adderall binge, I bought my first pocket pussy and I quickly blew through my lube (and by quickly I mean like 6 hours) if you’ve never done a shit ton of amphetamines, they make you super horny, and you can’t bust, and the intense focus and energy causes you to lose track of time and goon for literal hours. True degeneracy.
Anyways since I was out of lube I scoured the house for a replacement, and settled for my roommate’s olive oil, and moved my fap station to the shower since she had woken up and we shared a wall. I got out of the shower and didn’t think to clean up. The poor thing slipped in shower on the olive oil and hit her head. Fortunately she was okay and I don’t think she ever figured out what caused it. This was like 2013 and I’m happy to say I’m no longer a filthy degenerate and have been sober for over 4 years. Don’t do adderall, kids
Tl;dr; I jumped in the pool of a resort, fully naked… in the middle of the day.
When I was 14 or 15 (can’t remember) and I had just returned home from a year in a student exchange program, a friend (m) invited me to spend a week at a resort his family had shares in.
There I met a girl that for some reason we hit it off almost immediately. On the second day, she asked me what was the wildest thing I’ve done, and I told her that I swam once a week with a friend (f) naked for the entire year I was in the exchange program.
She asked me if I had sex with the girl, and you know, wanting to sound a stud I told her yes (but no… that’s a different story). She told me she would want to do it, but only with someone wild.
I told her to try me, and she challenged me to jump in the pool naked the next day and complete a lap before getting out of it.
The next day, I went down the pool area in my bathrobe, she was there. I took it off, jumped in. Swam a lap, got out and security got to me.
After a long conversation with my friend’s parents, how I had shamed them, that I had to explain my actions and that they would be telling my parents, I asked to speak to my friends step dad alone.
I told him a hot chick had challenged me and that the group (of teenagers) were kind of distant to me, but didn’t explain the details of why I really went in and did it.
Lucky for me, the stepdad has seen me chatting to the girl the day before and told me not to do anything crazy again or I would be going back home by bus.
About two days later, I saw the girl naked, but we didn’t do anything (she got cold feet at the last minute).
Since that day until we returned home, the resorts staff kept an eye on everything I did, and the bartender called me “sausage boy”…
I fucked a horny 45 year old women at 4:30 in the morning in the back of a bar, I was 26. What you don’t know is she was married to the owner of the bar, they have 2 kids. I had no idea. And she was disgusting, I Can’t describe the smell of my penis the day after withouth getting banned.
A girl I was having a FWB relationship with, knowing I wasn’t the only one, was a bit of a tease and she rang me up one night as she was, by the sounds of it, getting a right clattering. Being horny I knocked a quick one out listening to her panting as the guy went for it, but in the post nut clarity phase I listened closer and realised that it was her flip flops slapping as she was puffing her way up her flats stairs and she must have pocket dialled me getting her keys out her pocket or something. Edit: it was a block of flats, not one flat / small apartment. I guess the elevator was out of order or busy. And no, I didn’t want to call her and ask afterwards.
When I was 11, I Inaccurately hand painted a Chun-li street fighter G.I. Joe to look nude, Unaware what to do with my hormonal anxiety, I’d just stare at it for hours getting a weird little boy boner.
One day I accidentally dry humped my way to climax while holding her, confused and overcome with guilt I flushed her down the toilet.
Drove from Pennsylvania to North Carolina in a beater of a car with a dying alternator. It got me there for the long weekend, but not back. Got stuck half way home in a random town in Virginia. To be fair, I did end up marrying the girl that got me doing that. 30 years and still together.
I beat my dick like it owed money when I was a young man, usually dry. So badly in fact, that the skin started peeling and it was hurting. I figured I needed to use lube to make it more pleasurable, so I chose hand sanitizer. Big mistake. Huge.
Had a FWB who’s ring tone on my cell was a voice yelling “Booty call! It’s a booty call!” Of course she calls while I’m checking out at the grocery store, and a long line behind me. So I did what any red blooded guy would do, I paid for my groceries and headed straight to her house!
For some reason when I get sick and have a fever w headache i get a real strong urge to masturbate. No matter how bad the head pain is, i always keep going until I finish. When I finally do come the pain is momentarily overshadowed by the orgasm before it comes back with full force and its just fucking horrible. Not worth it at all. But I can’t help myself
Idk if it’s a worst thing but I’ll just do it anyway. So I had this flash drive full of porn that suits my taste. I accidently left it plugged on my phone and slept. The next day I noticed it and it smelled like burnt wire and doesn’t work either so my speculation was because the connections got burnt.
That night, I was so horny and was looking for that specific porn that I had in that drive and I FORGOT THE TITLE AND THE ACTRESS. So I went full on Tony Stark sht and dismantled that thing, tried connecting small ass wires with a tape. Hell I tried using superglue to hold the copper in the right places, even searched about how the connection works. Took me all night just to get that thing fixed.
Sadly, it didn’t worked lol. But it sparked my interest in electronics. Now currently an Electrical Eng Student Lol
While visiting colleges with my parents and a group of friends when I was 17 or 18, we went to Tarleton State and watched a football game. During the game there was a group of girls and one of them kept eyeing me, as we were leaving one of the girls ran up to me when no one was looking and gave me the phone number of the one friend.
Texted back and forth for a bit, and turns out she and her friends were in the hotel right beside ours, so she says come over. Sneak out of the hotel room that I’m staying in with my parents, go over and do the deed in a room that her and two other friends are in, then sneak back to my hotel room.
Never got her name, pretty sure her friends were watching us, and made up an excuse to my parents of why I left the room. Main thing I remember is the dark room being lit by the parking lot lights and she tasted like Camel Crushes.
Had a fwb situation going on and we met on Friday afternoon. She said she just wanted to have a weekend long fuckfest. She was fun and a bit wild so I said it sounds like fun. This psycho spiked every drink I had for three days with viagra to keep me going. By Sunday morning my chest hurt and I was feeling like hell, plus she threw in the occasional “I love you…I mean I love what you do to me”. She ended up stalking me for a year. And caused my heart attack with an overdose of viagra.
I remember seeing a comment about a guy who didn’t have internet access so he logged into COD and shot the outline of boobs onto the wall and beat it to that
Think I’ve posted this before but a loch of years ago in uni I was mad into this girl who worked in one of the local bars. She was, apparently, one of the Suicide Girls (punk/alt models from years ago, no idea if they’re still around.) Anyway, I fancied the pants off her but aside from a bit of flirtatious teasing she was never much into me.
Then, one night, I dunno what changed, but I was talking to her at the bar and for whatever reason she decided it was on. We hop in a taxi after her shift, absolutely mauling each other in the back seat on the way to her house. Get into her place and I’m mad nervous about disappointing this woman I basically worshipped so I was determined to show her a good time. We get into bed and once things have warmed up a bit I head south. I love giving oral so even then I was fairly decent at it. She has a wonderful time, full screaming, shuddering its-too-much-now-stop-or-i’ll-kick-you-in-the-face orgasm.
Pressures off me now so I’m ready for action but when I get back to her she declares that she’s exhausted, has an early start and needs to sleep.
Well fuck. So she rolls over and drifts off and I’m left with this thumping fucking erection looking up at me in a rage like the eye of Sauron.
After a while I admit there’s not a chance of sleep and resolve to deal with it. Very quietly I start seeing to myself and after a fuckin eternity the auld boyo indicates that he’s ready to give up the goods and let me sleep. I catch the stuff in my hand thinking I’ll just wipe it off with a tissue or something. But I’m looking around the room now and there’s nothing close at hand. I get my old Nokia 3210 off the floor to shine a bit of light but it only has this dull green glow that wouldnt startle a gremlin. There’s a bin by the bed but it’s one of them wire yokes and has no bag in it.
I’m panicking now because this stuff is starting to separate in my hand and THIS is the moment she decides she wants to roll over and cuddle. So with few there options that I could see, I just hoofed the juice down my throat.
We fall asleep, she gets up the next day and all of a sudden were back to the old dynamic. I never got with her again.
As a side note, the auld man milk wasn’t that bad. I don’t get why people make such a big deal out of swallowing. I wouldnt be dipping my chips in it or anything but it was largely inoffensive
My long distance bf flew in to see me and the drive back to my place is about two hours. He drove and I got so turned on just talking to him that I started absentmindedly playing with myself, which rapidly resulted in the removal of my panties. He got so turned on watching me that I could see his erection through his jeans. We hadn’t seen each other in over a month and the sexual tension was THICK! So I unbuckled, got on my knees, unzipped his pants and gave him a BJ and he fingered me while he drove down the interstate. He started breathing really heavy and actually started hyperventilating and had to pull over on the shoulder because his face was tingling. I didn’t stop….
And… as soon as he finished and I squirted, a cop pulled up behind us to check on why we were stopped. We hurriedly covered up and thought we had been super smooth. When the cop left, we realized my soaked panties were clearly visible right up on the dash board…
Picked up a woman double my age in a bar. Took her to a hotel. Woke up the next day and she was gone and she’d left a wad of cash…..She thought I was a male prostitute…
Was getting to know my first girlfriend. She was over. We were 15 years old. Didn’t have a condom. I walked in a heavy storm/snow blizzard for 1 and a 1/2 hour each way! 3 hours total. To the nearest gas station to buy condoms. The weather was… brutal. Couldn’t have my eyes open. Heavy snow and very, very strong wind. Very cold + the wind chill = dangerously cold, but I dressed accordingly. This walk should’ve taken 30 minutes each way in normal conditions. When I finally came back home…. she had fallen asleep. Oh boy, what a disappointment. I couldn’t believe it.
…but the condoms came in handy the next day, so it was not all for nothing, but in hindsight going out in this weather was very stupid, it could’ve gone very badly. This was before mobile phones and the Internet
The surprise look on the guy in the gas station when I came there was something. He did not expect a customer that evening. No one was out. No cars and certainly not anyone walking, when I asked for the pack of condoms he laughed, smiled and shook his head. I could tell by the look in his eyes he was thinking, “I get it”
Comments
Being drunk also played into it but I hooked up with a neighbor
Fap til the skin started peeling off.
Was using Dettol as lube.
I know. I know….
P/S: Circumcised
Slept with a number of women I shouldn’t have slept with.
My ex.
Smelly Anal sex with very chucky yucky fat 70 year old female
Post this question
Got used to flicking the bean in my truck
Edit: I have tinted windows it’s fine
Sent a “you up?” text to my boss by accident.
At the advice of counsel I must use the protections granted to me by the fifth amendment of the United States.
Jerked off in a theatre while I was in high school
Got locked out of my house nude.
Spending the whole night masturbating, then only getting about an hour or 2 of sleep. Post nut clarity always makes me think “why did you do that?”
Jerking off going down the interstate.
Gotta do what you gotta do dawg
Probably making out with my boss would be on the top of that list
When I was 16 I stuck a ballpoint pen up my dick. It was a fancy one that’s thicker than normal pens, maybe 7 or 8mm wide. I slowly but surely worked it a short way into my dick, but then realized it didn’t want to slide back out.
The back of it was a separate plastic piece that screwed on, and apparently it was a tiny bit wider than the rest of the pen, so there was a little edge where they met. It was barely noticeable while looking at it, but inside of a wingwang that edge had some serious staying power.
I considered going to the doctor, but I couldn’t drive at that point, and I had no idea how to get my parents to take me without explaining what happened, which I thought would probably end in violence or me being kicked out and left to die or something. I eventually ended up yanking hard on the pen and it came out.
It hurt and made my dick bleed, 3/10, wouldn’t do again, and generally wouldn’t recommend it to anyone else.
I shagged the woman my Dad was trying to get with….
Hooked up with a 40-ish man when i was 16.
Thankfully i looked younger than that so he felt uncomfortable and changed his mind.
It was because of the anti-schizo meds i was taking, i don’t know what’s in them but all the meds of this type would cause me to be INSANELY horny 24/7.
I don’t take them anymore
I think there is a nude someone still out there of me.
I’ve fallen for a fake account in instagram, yet this scammer might even have been dumber than me. Because after only one full body pic threatened me to tell my family and friends. Now that is scary, yet I was a 22 y/o white man with no shame of his body(maybe my chubby belly but who cares)
I blocked the scammer and never heard a thing. This is now 3 years ago. Also, my family never received a photo and if they did, all I had to was explain I’ve been a dumb fuck. Would have been fucked up, but not the end of the world. So I’ve decided that if I ever get famous and they try to use it on me, I’d say that is photoshopped.
I’m a dumbfuck but that might have been the worst scammer I’ve ever seen. XD
Went to a strangers house for a one nicht stand, really didn’t think about how dangerous that was
Beat it to the letter O.
Made a hole in my bed
I have a friend who put a marker inside her. She was later very ashamed. Although, its not that bad
My ex friends (this happened after the end of our friendship) babies mom was at my house and she started grinding in me but she didn’t want to have sex. She was on her period and claimed ‘i could make you up cum without penetration’. Obviously she wasn’t making anything happen besides my dick be coming raw, I asked her for head, she said no but i could cum on her face. So I took sat her on the ground and ejaculated all over her face.
I had just got back from military training and didn’t nut for almost a month. She was surprised and covered and as she was licking her lips, i kissed her. I was caught in the moment but i tasted my own cum
The comments here are getting progressively worse as people start breaking the ice with each diabolical story
Almost gave my roommate a concussion. Allow me to explain.
I used to do a ton of drugs, and while on an adderall binge, I bought my first pocket pussy and I quickly blew through my lube (and by quickly I mean like 6 hours) if you’ve never done a shit ton of amphetamines, they make you super horny, and you can’t bust, and the intense focus and energy causes you to lose track of time and goon for literal hours. True degeneracy.
Anyways since I was out of lube I scoured the house for a replacement, and settled for my roommate’s olive oil, and moved my fap station to the shower since she had woken up and we shared a wall. I got out of the shower and didn’t think to clean up. The poor thing slipped in shower on the olive oil and hit her head. Fortunately she was okay and I don’t think she ever figured out what caused it. This was like 2013 and I’m happy to say I’m no longer a filthy degenerate and have been sober for over 4 years. Don’t do adderall, kids
Went on Craigslist as a Horny 18 year old 😅
Assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand, igniting the events of World War 1.
I posted a job online that I’m looking for a nude model.
I got many responses, then I asked a studio to show me some of their previous works and masturbated to it.
I did it all because I was horny.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/32w7lj/what_is_the_worst_thing_you_did_because_you_were/
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2g8kur/whats_the_worst_thing_youve_done_because_you_were/
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2c40z7/what_is_the_worst_thing_you_did_because_you_were/
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/gsn2ij/out_of_all_stupid_things_youve_ever_done_while/
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/enu36l/what_is_the_worst_thing_your_horniness_made_you_do/
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/17ck3zr/whats_the_worst_thing_youve_ever_done_when_horny/
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/bn2ifb/whats_the_dumbest_thing_youve_done_while_horny/
“I’ve followed my dick places I wouldn’t go with a gun”
Hooked up with the blank profile on Grindr
sigh
That one guys dead wife
Went out to fap in my backyard during full moon at 12:00 AM. Thought it would somehow alter the experience.
Drove 4 towns over in a goddam ICE STORM… was very lucky to not put my car in a ditch multiple times
got fucked in my college toilets in zombie makeup?
Sex outside in the middle of the bush.
I had 8 mosquito bites and 1 horsefly bite on my taint and asshole.
Tl;dr; I jumped in the pool of a resort, fully naked… in the middle of the day.
When I was 14 or 15 (can’t remember) and I had just returned home from a year in a student exchange program, a friend (m) invited me to spend a week at a resort his family had shares in.
There I met a girl that for some reason we hit it off almost immediately. On the second day, she asked me what was the wildest thing I’ve done, and I told her that I swam once a week with a friend (f) naked for the entire year I was in the exchange program.
She asked me if I had sex with the girl, and you know, wanting to sound a stud I told her yes (but no… that’s a different story). She told me she would want to do it, but only with someone wild.
I told her to try me, and she challenged me to jump in the pool naked the next day and complete a lap before getting out of it.
The next day, I went down the pool area in my bathrobe, she was there. I took it off, jumped in. Swam a lap, got out and security got to me.
After a long conversation with my friend’s parents, how I had shamed them, that I had to explain my actions and that they would be telling my parents, I asked to speak to my friends step dad alone.
I told him a hot chick had challenged me and that the group (of teenagers) were kind of distant to me, but didn’t explain the details of why I really went in and did it.
Lucky for me, the stepdad has seen me chatting to the girl the day before and told me not to do anything crazy again or I would be going back home by bus.
About two days later, I saw the girl naked, but we didn’t do anything (she got cold feet at the last minute).
Since that day until we returned home, the resorts staff kept an eye on everything I did, and the bartender called me “sausage boy”…
I fucked a horny 45 year old women at 4:30 in the morning in the back of a bar, I was 26. What you don’t know is she was married to the owner of the bar, they have 2 kids. I had no idea. And she was disgusting, I Can’t describe the smell of my penis the day after withouth getting banned.
Bought premium on dating apps for too much money only to get 0 matches
A girl I was having a FWB relationship with, knowing I wasn’t the only one, was a bit of a tease and she rang me up one night as she was, by the sounds of it, getting a right clattering. Being horny I knocked a quick one out listening to her panting as the guy went for it, but in the post nut clarity phase I listened closer and realised that it was her flip flops slapping as she was puffing her way up her flats stairs and she must have pocket dialled me getting her keys out her pocket or something. Edit: it was a block of flats, not one flat / small apartment. I guess the elevator was out of order or busy. And no, I didn’t want to call her and ask afterwards.
This is still literally one of the most memorable stories I remember years later lmaoooo
TIFU coconut
Had sex on my period… ruin the sheets lol
A 410 lbs woman, thee next day, her weight broke my PT Cruiser’s timing chain.
When I was 11, I Inaccurately hand painted a Chun-li street fighter G.I. Joe to look nude, Unaware what to do with my hormonal anxiety, I’d just stare at it for hours getting a weird little boy boner.
One day I accidentally dry humped my way to climax while holding her, confused and overcome with guilt I flushed her down the toilet.
HUMPIN’ ‘N’ DUMPIN’ SINCE ’95
Drove from Pennsylvania to North Carolina in a beater of a car with a dying alternator. It got me there for the long weekend, but not back. Got stuck half way home in a random town in Virginia. To be fair, I did end up marrying the girl that got me doing that. 30 years and still together.
I beat my dick like it owed money when I was a young man, usually dry. So badly in fact, that the skin started peeling and it was hurting. I figured I needed to use lube to make it more pleasurable, so I chose hand sanitizer. Big mistake. Huge.
Had a FWB who’s ring tone on my cell was a voice yelling “Booty call! It’s a booty call!” Of course she calls while I’m checking out at the grocery store, and a long line behind me. So I did what any red blooded guy would do, I paid for my groceries and headed straight to her house!
For some reason when I get sick and have a fever w headache i get a real strong urge to masturbate. No matter how bad the head pain is, i always keep going until I finish. When I finally do come the pain is momentarily overshadowed by the orgasm before it comes back with full force and its just fucking horrible. Not worth it at all. But I can’t help myself
Idk if it’s a worst thing but I’ll just do it anyway. So I had this flash drive full of porn that suits my taste. I accidently left it plugged on my phone and slept. The next day I noticed it and it smelled like burnt wire and doesn’t work either so my speculation was because the connections got burnt.
That night, I was so horny and was looking for that specific porn that I had in that drive and I FORGOT THE TITLE AND THE ACTRESS. So I went full on Tony Stark sht and dismantled that thing, tried connecting small ass wires with a tape. Hell I tried using superglue to hold the copper in the right places, even searched about how the connection works. Took me all night just to get that thing fixed.
Sadly, it didn’t worked lol. But it sparked my interest in electronics. Now currently an Electrical Eng Student Lol
While visiting colleges with my parents and a group of friends when I was 17 or 18, we went to Tarleton State and watched a football game. During the game there was a group of girls and one of them kept eyeing me, as we were leaving one of the girls ran up to me when no one was looking and gave me the phone number of the one friend.
Texted back and forth for a bit, and turns out she and her friends were in the hotel right beside ours, so she says come over. Sneak out of the hotel room that I’m staying in with my parents, go over and do the deed in a room that her and two other friends are in, then sneak back to my hotel room.
Never got her name, pretty sure her friends were watching us, and made up an excuse to my parents of why I left the room. Main thing I remember is the dark room being lit by the parking lot lights and she tasted like Camel Crushes.
Had a fwb situation going on and we met on Friday afternoon. She said she just wanted to have a weekend long fuckfest. She was fun and a bit wild so I said it sounds like fun. This psycho spiked every drink I had for three days with viagra to keep me going. By Sunday morning my chest hurt and I was feeling like hell, plus she threw in the occasional “I love you…I mean I love what you do to me”. She ended up stalking me for a year. And caused my heart attack with an overdose of viagra.
I remember seeing a comment about a guy who didn’t have internet access so he logged into COD and shot the outline of boobs onto the wall and beat it to that
Think I’ve posted this before but a loch of years ago in uni I was mad into this girl who worked in one of the local bars. She was, apparently, one of the Suicide Girls (punk/alt models from years ago, no idea if they’re still around.) Anyway, I fancied the pants off her but aside from a bit of flirtatious teasing she was never much into me.
Then, one night, I dunno what changed, but I was talking to her at the bar and for whatever reason she decided it was on. We hop in a taxi after her shift, absolutely mauling each other in the back seat on the way to her house. Get into her place and I’m mad nervous about disappointing this woman I basically worshipped so I was determined to show her a good time. We get into bed and once things have warmed up a bit I head south. I love giving oral so even then I was fairly decent at it. She has a wonderful time, full screaming, shuddering its-too-much-now-stop-or-i’ll-kick-you-in-the-face orgasm.
Pressures off me now so I’m ready for action but when I get back to her she declares that she’s exhausted, has an early start and needs to sleep.
Well fuck. So she rolls over and drifts off and I’m left with this thumping fucking erection looking up at me in a rage like the eye of Sauron.
After a while I admit there’s not a chance of sleep and resolve to deal with it. Very quietly I start seeing to myself and after a fuckin eternity the auld boyo indicates that he’s ready to give up the goods and let me sleep. I catch the stuff in my hand thinking I’ll just wipe it off with a tissue or something. But I’m looking around the room now and there’s nothing close at hand. I get my old Nokia 3210 off the floor to shine a bit of light but it only has this dull green glow that wouldnt startle a gremlin. There’s a bin by the bed but it’s one of them wire yokes and has no bag in it.
I’m panicking now because this stuff is starting to separate in my hand and THIS is the moment she decides she wants to roll over and cuddle. So with few there options that I could see, I just hoofed the juice down my throat.
We fall asleep, she gets up the next day and all of a sudden were back to the old dynamic. I never got with her again.
As a side note, the auld man milk wasn’t that bad. I don’t get why people make such a big deal out of swallowing. I wouldnt be dipping my chips in it or anything but it was largely inoffensive
My long distance bf flew in to see me and the drive back to my place is about two hours. He drove and I got so turned on just talking to him that I started absentmindedly playing with myself, which rapidly resulted in the removal of my panties. He got so turned on watching me that I could see his erection through his jeans. We hadn’t seen each other in over a month and the sexual tension was THICK! So I unbuckled, got on my knees, unzipped his pants and gave him a BJ and he fingered me while he drove down the interstate. He started breathing really heavy and actually started hyperventilating and had to pull over on the shoulder because his face was tingling. I didn’t stop….
And… as soon as he finished and I squirted, a cop pulled up behind us to check on why we were stopped. We hurriedly covered up and thought we had been super smooth. When the cop left, we realized my soaked panties were clearly visible right up on the dash board…
10/10, would do again!
Picked up a woman double my age in a bar. Took her to a hotel. Woke up the next day and she was gone and she’d left a wad of cash…..She thought I was a male prostitute…
Was getting to know my first girlfriend. She was over. We were 15 years old. Didn’t have a condom. I walked in a heavy storm/snow blizzard for 1 and a 1/2 hour each way! 3 hours total. To the nearest gas station to buy condoms. The weather was… brutal. Couldn’t have my eyes open. Heavy snow and very, very strong wind. Very cold + the wind chill = dangerously cold, but I dressed accordingly. This walk should’ve taken 30 minutes each way in normal conditions. When I finally came back home…. she had fallen asleep. Oh boy, what a disappointment. I couldn’t believe it.
…but the condoms came in handy the next day, so it was not all for nothing, but in hindsight going out in this weather was very stupid, it could’ve gone very badly. This was before mobile phones and the Internet
The surprise look on the guy in the gas station when I came there was something. He did not expect a customer that evening. No one was out. No cars and certainly not anyone walking, when I asked for the pack of condoms he laughed, smiled and shook his head. I could tell by the look in his eyes he was thinking, “I get it”