Repost, I want answers. Is it rude of me to ignore if it’s in the crowded city at night and it’s a simple “hi” in passing? How about even in the day?
Is this cat calling? Happens to me more than I want.
Repost, I want answers. Is it rude of me to ignore if it’s in the crowded city at night and it’s a simple “hi” in passing? How about even in the day?
Is this cat calling? Happens to me more than I want.
Comments
Not rude. You’re under no obligation to give anyone your time or attention, especially some rando you don’t even know.
No you are not required to say “hi” to anyone you don’t want too
Sometimes being polite is both exhausting and impractical, and being rude is understandable and needed.
Is it rude not to reply to someone that’s talking to you? In most cases, yes, but in this situation it’s also understandable
It might be a bit rude, but that doesn’t mean you need to change your behavior. Rudeness is sometimes necessary in life.
No, theres no rule anywhere for anyone to talk to strangers and if they get annoyed then act like they are not there
No, you don’t have to respond to random folks on the street. That’s completely fair.
You are probably not worth talking to anyway. So in a way I guess you are doing them a favor by getting that out there.
No. But “quick wave and keep walking” is a good alternative.
Is it rude? Maybe.
Like everything in life, you can choose how you behave to others… but you do not get to choose how others perceive your behavior.
So might someone perceive you as rude? Yes. Does it matter? Only if they end up having some prolonged interaction with you for some unforeseen reason.
Yes, but you aren’t obligated. (let me clarify then kill me)
Yes in general it is rude to go out in public places and when a stranger says hi to not even give them a hi back. But that doesn’t mean sit, stand and talk with them. It can be as simple as a hi while you keep on walking. You are also not obligated to be polite nor do you owe it to anyone or does it make you a bad person that there are times in your life in which you aren’t prioritizing being polite.
I think as women, we are taught it’s best to be polite always no matter what. That isn’t the case. Men aren’t like that. They aren’t polite in every situation and no one calls them a bitch over it.
Some situations, times or places aren’t the time to prioritize being polite.
So is it rude? yes. Is it maybe better at times to prioritize not being polite? YES YES YES Does it make you an over bad or rude person? Absolutely not.
No, it’s not rude at all to ignore someone saying “hi” in passing, especially if you’re with friends or just not in the mood for interaction. People have different comfort levels with socializing, and you don’t owe anyone a greeting if you’re not feeling it. It’s your personal space, and you have the right to set boundaries however you see fit.
generally yeah it’s rude to not acknowledge someone who says hi. but you don’t owe them a conversation – just say hi back and keep walking.
If a random man says hi to me in a crowded city, I’m not making eye contact and I’m definitely not saying hi. Nothing good has ever come out of that.
Walking through a quiet residential neighborhood, sometimes people will say hi (mostly elderly people) and then I’ll say hi back.
Depends, if you are living in somewhere like Marrakech or Monaco it would make a big difference right.
Is it rude? Perhaps.
Are you wrong? No.
It’s like walking on a path. A simple hi in passing is being friendly. Is it mandatory? No. But it certainly makes a person feel like a pos when it’s not reciprocated
It can be seen as rude.
The thing is which happens to me is that you accidentally make eye contact it’s awkward and the first thing that comes out of your mouth is HI.
Then because I don’t put any thought into this person who is just passing by I say Hi.
I don’t put any thought into it because why would I?
It’s your party; respond if you want to.
Nothing wrong with a bit of positivity and just say morning or afternoon back.
Is this cat calling? Haha, not even close. If it is, I cat call old ladies and dudes all the time when I go out for a walk.
Do you people really want to live in a world where another human wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire? Because that’s the world you get where kindness, manners, consideration, politeness, etc. for your fellow humans goes right out the window. Yes OP you are rude. No, you aren’t obligated to give anyone your time, response, or attention. But then, I’m also not obligated to intervene or report anything if I randomly happen to walk around the corner just in time to see you getting assaulted, am I? Like it or not, we are all in this together. The world is smaller than you think, and that person you were rude to just might be in a position to help you (or not) someday when you are in need.
How do you define qualities like ‘kindness’, ‘love’, ‘tolerance’?
If you consider ignoring people who are friendly towards you as any of the above, or that it does not impose on it, I guess it’s fine.
Being friendly towards others is a way of showing kindness though.
Do you dislike showing kindness, are you okay with being complacent to the world being a cold and unforgiving place? One day when you are older and you crave attention from others; will you be the one saying hi to people who ignore you because you’re old and remember you did the same thing to others when they showed you kindness?
I strive to at least try to treat other people the way I would like to be treated. No matter how they look, or where they are from or what they may have to offer. No one is perfect, but I think to try is better than to not care at all.
Seeing a lot of people saying it’s not rude lol. May I ask where you are from? In Georgia if someone walking by says “hi” or “morning” it would be rude to not at least nod and wave, and to out right ignore them would be insulting. As it’s perceived as “I’m better than you” mentality.
In a city like New York I imagine it’s not rude at all to ignore someone while walking by, as that’s just more so apart of the culture there. That’s why I ask where you are from.
Also in Georgia it would in no way be considered “cat calling” lol.
No, it’s not rude. It’s safety conscious. I personally prefer to give a nod of acknowledgement rather than a “Hi” to a complete stranger.
No.
“You’re not wrong, you’re just an asshole”
But seriously, who gives a fuck. You don’t have to do anything! But maybe the fact that you’re asking this and being self aware points to something. You get what you give, I believe.
Someone saying hi isn’t cat calling.
Ignoring a simple hi is rude but you don’t owe anyone anything, not even politeness.
I give a little nod of acknowledgment and immediately look away. I’m saying “I hear you and that’s going to be the extent of our interaction.”
Doesn’t have to be all or nothing. No obligation to respond, and sure, can say “hi” back, or something like that … or dial it back a level … or order of magnitude. E.g. give a barely audible “hi”, or maybe the lips move to say “hi”, but zero vocalization – maybe not even a movement of air to accompany it. Or a nod or smile, or partial trace thereof, or a wave, or a half-hearted (or less) wave. But yeah, absolutely and completely ignoring may be taken as rude … or being entirely oblivious and unaware. So, often better to give some (slight) response. Of course if the attention is inappropriate, the response can also reflect that … frown, stare, scowl … whatever works.
Anyway, don’t have to do diddly, but typically better and more useful to give at least some trace of response … even if it’s (on the) negative (side).
But if you’re getting absolutely hammered with folks saying “hi”, trying to get your attention, etc. (e.g. you’re a highly recognized and wildly popular celebrity), that mostly just gets quite annoying, so feel free to ignore, or mostly just give an indistinct response directed towards the masses, rather than at all individualized.
Anyway, context matters. Just don’t be an *ss about it. But if someone isn’t treating you right, no need to be polite about it … civil but curt will generally do in such circumstances.
Also, if you ignore, there’s always the risk folks will think you didn’t see/hear them, so they may step it up – often that’s not what’s wanted, so often a muted (or negative) response is more practical to generally shut it down (presuming that’s what one wants to do).
Your mileage may vary 😉 … within reason, use what works for you.
Nah. Not rude. Only give your energy to people who you want to. I tend to smile or ask how ya doing to strangers when I’m walking. I don’t expect anything back but I hope it helped them have a better day.
To anyone who asks why guys don’t ask them out. This is why.
Who cares? You’ll hopefully never see them again.
I work in a big place and say hi to everyone in passing. Men and Women. It’s like 50:50 they’ll just ignore me like I said nothing. Women don’t ignore me more than men, but sometimes they make a face lol. A don’t hit on me face, but it’s just saying hi, so whatever, they can take it how they want.
So I don’t think it would be ruder if you are out with friends. And ignoring people seems to be a fairly normal thing to do. You shouldn’t assume everyone intentions though. A lot of people are probably saying hi cause it’s a social setting.
Even tho its definitely unerstandable, It will almost always be seen as rude, but nobody’s perfect, and a dude who’s confident in himself won’t care and might even laugh to himself about it 💯✌🏾
I’m going to assume you’re a woman, since you asked about cat calling.
In a big, crowded city at night, if you’re not at some outdoor event where it’s expected to meet strangers, and if you haven’t shown any interest by extended eye contact or other body language, it’s unnecessary and inappropriate for them to say hi. Men should be aware that many women fear uninvited advances at night, and that nighttime streets aren’t a place for meeting strangers. They should go into a bar or club where people go to meet others if that’s what they want. It would be different if it’s a street party or just people congregating outside a popular club to socialize.
Also, there might be cities that aren’t crowded by big city standards, but might seem that way to people not familiar with real crowds. Or areas that are known to be so safe that women wouldn’t normally be afraid. In those cases, it could be normal to say hi in passing with no intent to start a conversation. Still, you’re under no obligation to say hi back.
Without reading the other replies, I’d say that it depends on what part of the country you’re in. Somewhere like, say, New York City or Los Angeles, where people are about just their own business and keep their heads down, it might be rude but “rude” is the expectation. However, somewhere like Nashville or New Orleans, it would be considered rude because you weren’t minding your manners and that takes it to a different level.
EDIT: Now that I’ve read through some of the other replies…GEEZ…there’s a lot of folks out there without decent manners. Acknowledging someone, a random passerby, in a public setting isn’t that difficult or dangerous. Simply returning a gentle “Hi” with a ”Hey” as you pass by isn’t an invitation to marriage nor does it carry the threat of nonconsensual bedroom activities.
If someone smiles and says “Hi”, yes it is rude to not reciprocate. I’m from the Midwest, we say Hi
Saying hi isn’t cat calling. It’s saying hi. Social media got us all fucked up
So firstly women are allowed to be rude to men.
But it depends, are they just saying hi because you’re cute? Because a lot of dudes pretend they’re being polite when they actually just want to get a cute girls attention to hit on them. They’re the ones being rude.
I have a habit of greeting people as I pass by them. Most cordially express an unforced greeting back.
Sometimes people look away when I greet them. I understand by reading their body language that they may feel that I’m intrusive towards them or perhaps they’re just shy. It’s 100% ok.
One thing they’ll never know by looking at me that I’m actually a gay guy who’s generally (just) friendly towards everyone.
I’m ever grateful that I live in the South. People actually like each other down here.
In my opinion, fwiw, is that if you’re out on a weekend night, walking with your friends down a crowded street (in an area where people are out enjoying life), where guys or groups of guys may be out doing the same then I’d say that any guy who gives you a “hi” is basically fishing to see if you’ll be so enamored with him that you’ll immediately stop and strike up a conversation and either give him your number or go home with him.
In the situation you describe, they see you and saying “hi” as they walk by is the only thing they can think of to get your attention.
It’s basically a drunk man’s mating call.
You’re not necessarily rude for not reciprocating if you know that you’re not interested. But it’s not necessarily a cat-call. It’s an attention getter. A cat-call is more like “damn, you’re looking good” or “hey baby”, or a straight up whistle.
However, it’s totally situational. A gaggle of young 20 something guys walking past and one or more says “hi”? you don’t have to respond. A guy walking his dog in the park on Sunday morning? It wouldn’t be the worst thing for you to say “hi”, chances are it’s a friendly, short way to acknowledge another person’s presence in the same place at the same time. But again it’s completely up to you and how comfortable you feel.
Source: Me, as a guy who used to say “Howdy” to get a girl’s reaction/attention when walking to and from bars.
I think it varies by location/event. Like, if it’s on the street then yeah, it’s a cat call, but if you’re approached at a bar or other social setting then it’s courteous to say hello even if the follow up is to let them know you aren’t interested.