So my wife very randomly all of a sudden wants to go to sex stores and spice things up. Our sex was never vanilla, but using toys has been out of our norm for a few years as we grew older (been together 10+ years). My wife is 36, have any of you other men over 30 seen a sporadic boost in sex drive from your wives or girlfriends? I don’t think it’s a bad thing, but I am shocked since we’re more tired than ever with a toddler running around now. I will say communicating more about what we like and don’t like has been very helpful to get both of our needs met.
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Not an increase in drive, that’s been steady, but we have been trying new things starting around 35 ish. I would say we’ve forged a deeper intimacy in the bedroom. We’ve also started doing it in the morning sometimes, which typically I was never in to but it kinda opened opportunities up on days night times were too tired.
You only live once! Try a new toy or a new dynamic out. Embrace the adventure and push through the fatigue to see what happens.
I’ve only seen it when I’ve been getting attention from other women at work and she knows it. There could be other circumstances, and I’m curious to what others say about that.
Dude – epic win for you!!! Youre crazy lucky and might not quite realize it yet. Any idea how many men would kill to have a partner that is excited about exploring in the bedroom together? Embrace this, lock in, help her explore and get ready to have some of the most fun you’ve ever had in your marriage.
Embrace this. This may be her communicating that she needs this. Also, most guys would kill for a woman to make a move like this or even be open to it.
One of the cruel jokes that nature plays on us is that a woman’s sex drive increases at around about the same time a man’s sex drive decreases… around 35…
http://old.mojoupgrade.com/ – Just get everyone on the same page.
“Sex stores”, at least the IRL physical ones are garbage. Usually gimmicky stuff for bachelorette parties. Kind of how Adam & Eve feel online. Sure it’s everything.
There are some classier websites like https://www.we-vibe.com/us/ with some nice products.
Nice
Trying to break the boredom of the norm. A new child brings challenges, lack of sleep, etc.
Have you ever been frustrated and just put ‘the pedal to the metal?’
Could be the same thing?
If it makes Mama happy, just roll with it.
Get ur butt ready bro
This is just the beginning
Some (not all) women get much more sexual as they approach menopause. Prepare yourself mortal, and embrace it.
Enjoy man. That’s how it’s suppose to be. Open communication about each others needs and fun.
Yea a little vibrator and some edible lube will go a long way to spicing things up, from time to time I’ll also blindfold my girl and choke her a little with my belt; she absolutely loves it.
“Kiss me” on Amazon is a great edible flavored lube brand
Has she recently been watching Thor movies?
I bought my wife a vibrator a few years back to take some pressure off myself! And she loves it, and makes me more relaxed in the moment if that makes sense.
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.
Males hit their peak in their late teens and early 20s. Ladies in their 30s.
https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/ss/slideshow-sex-drive-changes-age
Sounds like she’s trying to connect with you. Probably asked some random internet bots a question about how to reconnect with your husband while being tired and having a toddler. You should just talk to her
I was never going to marry and then I met a woman who could keep up with me sexually. It’s more than a decade later and I can’t keep up with her. Women in their mid thirties often get this second wind.
Yes. And one of the best things we did was mojoupgrade.com. My wife is horny but shy, and this was a perfect way to find (and then start doing) niche things we were both curious about. Enjoy the ride!
Yep. She was about 35. We were vanilla up to that point, and she got much spicier. Lasted about 2 years.
She has probably always wanted to spice it up but has just been too shy to bring it up.
67M with 2 grown kids and a fabulous marriage to my (75F) wife. Take it from someone who has experience. Sex life ebbs and flows with the needs of the children. As they get older, if you BOTH work at it and maintain your sense of HUMOR, things improve. There are two very significant days to look forward to.
How is this even an issue ? My wife did this out of the blue about 5 years ago .. I spent $500 .. do it and explore
Probably her work boyfriend getting her heated up but she don’t wanna cheat
Get the rose man
You are blessed my dude. You either get one that gets excessively horny around this age, one that decides to explore other men, or one that starts getting dried up. You hit the jackpot. She wants to explore with you. As long as she doesn’t want to stick something up your butt, you should be good lol 😆 😉
She wants to spice it up with you, instead of spicing it up with someone else
You are on a winner
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.
Why don’t you talk to your wife and ask her what the change is about?
Women peak later. I was 26 and smashing women in their mid to late 30s and it was awesome. Now the cougars are the same age as me 😭
Better than her spicing it up with your best friend or something
Get a Hitachi magic wand with that voltage switch. That’s all go for it. Nothing like feeling the vibration through her.
Variety is the spice of life. You say things weren’t vanilla before but everyone’s definition of vanilla is different. I feel like the longer you’re together the spicier things should get because the defenses should be down and no one, and I mean no one likes eating the same meal everyday, day in and day out. Sex is the same way. You guys perfected hamburgers now it’s time to try something new.
I wish my wife had that boost. She got baby fever almost 5 years ago, so the only sex I got was “hurry up and get it over with”, but I don’t count that. She’s 42 and I’m 41, and it’s been just about a decade since I’ve had anything that was REAL sex.
It’s happened that she has bursts of sexual drive. I’ve enjoyed the things we’ve explores and learned a lot about sex too. I never thought that I would get pegged, till it happened. She pegged me for a good year, but now we’ve stopped and are doing other things. Being open and willing to try stuff has been a game changer , our vanilla sex got even better as a result .
Go for it.
For us it was when the kids moved out. Suddenly having the whole house to ourselves made both of us more adventurous. Enjoy!
Absolutely, hang on bro because she’s just getting started
Woman in their late 30s are the horniest they will ever be.
Keep your electrolytes up bro.
43 here, divorced. I can say that the older they get, the more adventures they become. Say thank you to the fact she came to you for this and not someone else outside of the marriage. Sounds like a cool adventure to spice things up and good on her for taking the initiative. Not doing so is a good way for marriages to die.
Has she started reading books? That’s how my wife started showing more interest.
Enjoy the ride. My wife always had a lower sex drive than I did, but after she hit 40…
Leather gear, spanking, submission, consentual non-consent, bondage, anal, forced orgasms, rough sex, breath play, nipple clamps, electric shock toy (Zeus magic wand), 3 ways (both kinds), public humiliation… I was like, where has this been for the last 20 years?
Buckle up and prepare to smile.
Try to keep up and enjoy the ride.
This is a GOOD thing. Don’t complain, my friend! Many many many men are stuck with the opposite of what you’re describing- no sex at all.
I can honestly say I’ve never seen a boost in my wife’s interest in sex.
Do it. Yall will need to bring in ideas if you wanna go past your 10 year mark.
Don’t be afraid to time up with a vibrator. It’ll take you places, dawg
Wife: Hey hun, let’s go to the sex shop, I wanna spice things up.
Husband: Ahhh, hang on, I’ve gotta go post something on Reddit real quick.
That’s you, OP. That’s how you sound. Put your phone down, get your car keys, and get your woman to the sex shop!!
She wants another baby
She’s always been kinky, but her libido ramped up around the same age. She’s 39 now. It’s been fun though some days she wears me out. We don’t have kids so…
Get the lube ready, she’s gonna treat you like her little bitch.
Toys from AliExpress seem to be cheaper and more importantly have a much wider variety of both the kind of toy and the size. Other than that, Amazon is a good place the get a Hitachi Magic Wand.
36 is still young. She’s just bored and wants to fuck. Indulge her.
It’s a joke I presume. I can’t help thinking that when ppl say “oh, we’ve been together for like forever…. she’s like 36…”, it smells. Like shitpost smells. Like for real. 36 is barely into adult life. Already tired and bored and so fucking old? Really?
My wife is the same age. And this is something that has happened recently for me too.
Women are communicating about their sex lives on social media and in their friend groups. There is somewhat of a sexual revolution happening for them currently. With the rise of “booktok” and “spicy novels”.
Women get all kinky when they hit 40. I’m not sure what it is but it’s always the 40 yr old that love the most taboo shit.
Embrace it, toys are friends not foes