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No, we want to be young again. The stuff people miss about their single lives is really just the fun of youth.
The best time to be single is in your 20s. Finally earning a little bit of money, still connected to friends from basically your entire life, not many people dropping out of social life due to kids, it’s a much better environment.
At that age you can have real fun being single too. One night stands are still exciting and novel, one off dates are an excuse to try new stuff, maybe ends with some sex.
I don’t compare women against another woman that i could be in a relationship with. I compare her to my single life. And i happen to be the type that enjoys it.
Very few women can compare, most will just make my life worse and i don’t want to deal with that.
After a total of 12 years across 3 relationships, cohabitation and so on, i’m on an extended break that i don’t plan on ending, unless i somehow stumble upon a gem out there.
I involuntary became single when I was 31. I was engaged and she ended it. The first year sucked. The next few years were awesome. I had enough money to travel a bit. I got into even better shape, was able to take some job assignments out of the country, and basically do whatever I wanted. When I met my wife, I was not looking for a girlfriend at all. It just happened. In fact, she later told me she thought I was not interested because I was so indifferent about everything. I think it is very personality dependent. I am perfectly content being alone but social enough to have a solid friend group.
I’m intentionally single at 39 and honestly the most at peace I’ve ever been. Yes, there are infrequent times when I want a partner to quell the lack of intimacy (not necessarily just sex) and it would be nice to have some help with life necessities but it doesn’t out way the peace. I reassess every few years and decide to give dating a shot but for now, I’m enjoying it and the community/friends that I’ve made or been apart of are enough.
Happily married with kids, but I think this is largely for many reasons, if the man in question is not already romantically involved.
Source: All my observations of myself, and the single 30’s people in my life..
They know who they are now, what they like, what they value and they have the knowledge and finances to execute.
Typically, single women in their 30’s bring A LOT of baggage.
Hypergamy is real and women in their 20’s tend to be more up to.. non-committal relationships with men in their 30’s without all the baggage. Why date one woman in her 30s seriously who will likely be one of the multiple things I am saying, when you could date 2 to 3 at a time in their 20s without interfering with your life in any serious way?
Given the above, if the man reasonably takes care of himself and has stable finances, men tend to increase in dating marketability in their 30’s and 40’s and peak during this time. Most women tend to peak in their 20’s and 30’s
Women in their 30’s tend to date with resources and biological clocks in mind, which tends to make things obviously rushed and transactional.
If we are looking at serious romantic relationships transactionally, I would speculate about 8 out of 10 relationships tend to be horrible transactions for the men involved by multiple metrics.
The vast majority of serious romantic relationships interfere with #1.
Single men in their 30’s have their own baggage and understand serious romantic relationships complicate things often times, without meaning to.
Women tend to dramatically over rate their “dating marketplace value” and men tend to underrate themselves. If I ask my wife about any of her chronically single friends, they are all 10s and they would likely rate themselves as such as well.. society is not necessarily honest with women and women are not necessarily honest with each other or themselves. Why date someone who can’t even be honest with themselves about what they bring to the table and has convinced themselves they are the table? Which is the case with most chronically single women in their 30s
Now I have the money to do whatever the hell I want.. appartment at the beach and so on. So it would probably be really nice being single.
But at the same time having a family you love is just as important to me now.. so i only get to fantasize about all the broads id bring on my boat hahaha
I don’t want to wish to be single for that but I see no other way.
I have always been enough for myself , loved by myself since I was 19, lived like a free spirit in any way I want. Had my pub , worked as bartender as well as the manager / boss with other employees, had so many girls , drink everyday but also attend to college after 29, while all been in abroad.
Now I am 36, graduated as a software engineer (at least I have that) , working as Data Scientist so having 9-6 office hours job, married , having a 2 years old.
Lost my pub along the way, losing my mind while trying to keep it all together.
Can’t believe how much the life changed within a few years.
And well yes, I do want to be single again but only to have some peace and quite
Late 30’s. Divorced 5 years ago. At this point I would want a relationship again, yes. But I have so much shit to deal with and to figure out, that it’s shouldn’t even be a priority in the first place.
38, personally I don’t. I’m sure there are certain freedoms I take for granted and I do try and remind myself of that (obviously there are pro’s to doing what I want when I want) but ultimately I’m fucking lonely and hate doing life alone. I go on holiday alone, eat out alone, do almost everything alone. It sucks. And it especially sucks cos over the last few years I’ve hit a stage where I’ve lost interest in a lot of the things I used to love; going out drinking, socialising til late. I feel like I’ve become boring and therefore not only less desirable but I find myself in less scenarios where you’re likely to meet someone, and just have those fun young moments.
Its like I’ve heard people say, you wanna GROW old with someone, not just BE old with them
Feels better than being in a relationship. Some women say they want a man so they can turn off their brains while with him. And oh boy they indeed do. Peak unattractive.
I see life is meant to be shared with someone else, who really is as close as can be with you.
So no. I want to have someone by my side.
That being said, I can’t seem to find someone worth having by my side.
Edit: I’d like to add that I did find someone worth it all, but that didn’t hold, unfortunately. Lately I’ve been wondering if she affected me to the point I can’t trust women to give them my all anymore, which should be the way to live with someone else.
Sure, it would be nice to have a partner/meaningful relationship, but it is an extremely tall order – I would have to like spending time with her more than I like spending time with myself. In other words, she would have to be extremely special.
Everyone I know is paired up except one friend who divorced in the last year. He just sits in all day and smokes weed. I can’t even get him out for anything
I recently got married and I do miss my single life. Freedom to call whoever over whenever, get up and do whatever I want, whenever I want. As much as people say you can still do that with a right partner, you still have to be mindful of them and consider them with whatever it is you do. Whereas being single you only owe yourself an explanation ☕
I don’t think many men in their 30s (or any age, really) want to be single. Obviously, a percentage do.
That said, given what seems to be on offer, single seems to be the better option than being trapped in a relationship where you’re constantly being exploited.
I am single and loving it! I enjoy being baggage free, and I’m not even interested in going on a date, especially with all of today’s double standards. Rather than a life of quiet desperation, I spend all my time writing software (self-employed) and writing music with hopes to publish. I feel like I will only find a woman of my calibre once I’ve reached my goals, and I don’t even see the point in wasting my time settling for something less – I learned from my past and finally moved on from the women who hurt me. And the 30s me has all the dating insights and experience from my 20s with the added perspective of appreciating that my time is finite.
I don’t know how you would get statistics, but I don’t think most men have the kinds of options that would make being single fun. Many will want to have children early enough in life that they can see their grandchildren grow to be adults. Also, of course, a failed relationship can ruin a man financially, and many are afraid of that risk.
Eh no. I had a period of a few years single from like 33-36 and it got old fast. It wasn’t lack of sex either, I never had a problem hooking up when needed. But the lack of intimacy, both physical and emotional bites hard after a while. I like having my person that I can come home to at the end of the day, eat dinner with then cuddle on the couch for a while.
Being able to do whatever you want whenever is a breadth of fresh air. There is something to be said for sharing your joys in life with a significant other.
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I don’t want to be
I like being able to do what I want whenever I want
Not inconveniencing another person, nor having another person inconvenience me
I fucking hate brunch
No but I’m also not really willing to go out of my way to change it.
I don’t, but I see the writing on the wall. I work 73 hours a week on average. I don’t have time. It is what it is.
No, we want to be young again. The stuff people miss about their single lives is really just the fun of youth.
The best time to be single is in your 20s. Finally earning a little bit of money, still connected to friends from basically your entire life, not many people dropping out of social life due to kids, it’s a much better environment.
At that age you can have real fun being single too. One night stands are still exciting and novel, one off dates are an excuse to try new stuff, maybe ends with some sex.
If we did we would? There are choices.
I don’t compare women against another woman that i could be in a relationship with. I compare her to my single life. And i happen to be the type that enjoys it.
Very few women can compare, most will just make my life worse and i don’t want to deal with that.
After a total of 12 years across 3 relationships, cohabitation and so on, i’m on an extended break that i don’t plan on ending, unless i somehow stumble upon a gem out there.
Silly question.
Who wants to be lonely. That’s not in our genes.
No, but too many “modern women” are making that the better choice.
No. Give me love.
NOW!
I involuntary became single when I was 31. I was engaged and she ended it. The first year sucked. The next few years were awesome. I had enough money to travel a bit. I got into even better shape, was able to take some job assignments out of the country, and basically do whatever I wanted. When I met my wife, I was not looking for a girlfriend at all. It just happened. In fact, she later told me she thought I was not interested because I was so indifferent about everything. I think it is very personality dependent. I am perfectly content being alone but social enough to have a solid friend group.
In retrospect, yes.
I have only ever been single and I hate it.
I didn’t. I liked being married even though she could be a real pain at times (divorced in my 50s)
I knew I didn’t want kids so I spent my entire 30s single. Absolutely thrilled I did when I look at my peers
Counts on the man.
I’m intentionally single at 39 and honestly the most at peace I’ve ever been. Yes, there are infrequent times when I want a partner to quell the lack of intimacy (not necessarily just sex) and it would be nice to have some help with life necessities but it doesn’t out way the peace. I reassess every few years and decide to give dating a shot but for now, I’m enjoying it and the community/friends that I’ve made or been apart of are enough.
Ahh yes let’s generalize 50% of the world’s population.
I, for one, enjoyed meeting my wife, getting married, and starting a family in my 30s
Happily married with kids, but I think this is largely for many reasons, if the man in question is not already romantically involved.
Source: All my observations of myself, and the single 30’s people in my life..
They know who they are now, what they like, what they value and they have the knowledge and finances to execute.
Typically, single women in their 30’s bring A LOT of baggage.
Hypergamy is real and women in their 20’s tend to be more up to.. non-committal relationships with men in their 30’s without all the baggage. Why date one woman in her 30s seriously who will likely be one of the multiple things I am saying, when you could date 2 to 3 at a time in their 20s without interfering with your life in any serious way?
Given the above, if the man reasonably takes care of himself and has stable finances, men tend to increase in dating marketability in their 30’s and 40’s and peak during this time. Most women tend to peak in their 20’s and 30’s
Women in their 30’s tend to date with resources and biological clocks in mind, which tends to make things obviously rushed and transactional.
If we are looking at serious romantic relationships transactionally, I would speculate about 8 out of 10 relationships tend to be horrible transactions for the men involved by multiple metrics.
The vast majority of serious romantic relationships interfere with #1.
Single men in their 30’s have their own baggage and understand serious romantic relationships complicate things often times, without meaning to.
Women tend to dramatically over rate their “dating marketplace value” and men tend to underrate themselves. If I ask my wife about any of her chronically single friends, they are all 10s and they would likely rate themselves as such as well.. society is not necessarily honest with women and women are not necessarily honest with each other or themselves. Why date someone who can’t even be honest with themselves about what they bring to the table and has convinced themselves they are the table? Which is the case with most chronically single women in their 30s
I think tit would be a very special woman who my philosophies on life and why I smoke much weed
Generally I find other its hard to break even with other people about
I know I sure wouldn’t lol.
Mostly, I want to be 25 again
Yes and No.
Now I have the money to do whatever the hell I want.. appartment at the beach and so on. So it would probably be really nice being single.
But at the same time having a family you love is just as important to me now.. so i only get to fantasize about all the broads id bring on my boat hahaha
Whose asking this question. Why. It seems kinda like something happened to you
Why? I think pretty much everyone wants to be on a meaningful relationship.
Now if the choice is a bad relationship or being single I guess most would want to choose being single.
All I want is to have some peace in my life atm.
I don’t want to wish to be single for that but I see no other way.
I have always been enough for myself , loved by myself since I was 19, lived like a free spirit in any way I want. Had my pub , worked as bartender as well as the manager / boss with other employees, had so many girls , drink everyday but also attend to college after 29, while all been in abroad.
Now I am 36, graduated as a software engineer (at least I have that) , working as Data Scientist so having 9-6 office hours job, married , having a 2 years old.
Lost my pub along the way, losing my mind while trying to keep it all together.
Can’t believe how much the life changed within a few years.
And well yes, I do want to be single again but only to have some peace and quite
Unfortunately for me, I wasn’t given much of a choice. I was quite happy being married for the past 10 years with the girl I met in college.
But she decided to hit the self-destruct button on our marriage and I’m learning to be single again.
Yay.
How do individual redditors know what “most men” want? This is a question for a polling company.
Was in a long-term relationship from 17 until 30. Turned 31 this year, no kids. It feels fantastic to be single and not have anyone bother me.
I can do as I want, when I want, and it feels good to keep a 6 figure salary to myself as well.
Late 30’s. Divorced 5 years ago. At this point I would want a relationship again, yes. But I have so much shit to deal with and to figure out, that it’s shouldn’t even be a priority in the first place.
38, personally I don’t. I’m sure there are certain freedoms I take for granted and I do try and remind myself of that (obviously there are pro’s to doing what I want when I want) but ultimately I’m fucking lonely and hate doing life alone. I go on holiday alone, eat out alone, do almost everything alone. It sucks. And it especially sucks cos over the last few years I’ve hit a stage where I’ve lost interest in a lot of the things I used to love; going out drinking, socialising til late. I feel like I’ve become boring and therefore not only less desirable but I find myself in less scenarios where you’re likely to meet someone, and just have those fun young moments.
Its like I’ve heard people say, you wanna GROW old with someone, not just BE old with them
Yes.
it’s not that bad. I do wish I was getting laid though or at least dating around. A healthy relationship would be pretty sweet
Feels better than being in a relationship. Some women say they want a man so they can turn off their brains while with him. And oh boy they indeed do. Peak unattractive.
I do not want to be single.
I am arguably not single by choice, but due to circumstances right now, it doesn’t make sense to date at the moment.
Divorced and children.
I see life is meant to be shared with someone else, who really is as close as can be with you.
So no. I want to have someone by my side.
That being said, I can’t seem to find someone worth having by my side.
Edit: I’d like to add that I did find someone worth it all, but that didn’t hold, unfortunately. Lately I’ve been wondering if she affected me to the point I can’t trust women to give them my all anymore, which should be the way to live with someone else.
Edit 2: weird wording
Sure, it would be nice to have a partner/meaningful relationship, but it is an extremely tall order – I would have to like spending time with her more than I like spending time with myself. In other words, she would have to be extremely special.
Everyone I know is paired up except one friend who divorced in the last year. He just sits in all day and smokes weed. I can’t even get him out for anything
I recently got married and I do miss my single life. Freedom to call whoever over whenever, get up and do whatever I want, whenever I want. As much as people say you can still do that with a right partner, you still have to be mindful of them and consider them with whatever it is you do. Whereas being single you only owe yourself an explanation ☕
I simply don’t like what women are offering in relationships right now… I’d love to be in a committed loving relationship
I don’t think many men in their 30s (or any age, really) want to be single. Obviously, a percentage do.
That said, given what seems to be on offer, single seems to be the better option than being trapped in a relationship where you’re constantly being exploited.
Do I want to be single? Not really.
Do I want to be in a relationship? No, because my mental health is telling me that I am not good enough.
Will I stay single? Probably, because I have never seen a person interested in me.
Will I be happy about it? Maybe, maybe not, it depends on the day.
I am single and loving it! I enjoy being baggage free, and I’m not even interested in going on a date, especially with all of today’s double standards. Rather than a life of quiet desperation, I spend all my time writing software (self-employed) and writing music with hopes to publish. I feel like I will only find a woman of my calibre once I’ve reached my goals, and I don’t even see the point in wasting my time settling for something less – I learned from my past and finally moved on from the women who hurt me. And the 30s me has all the dating insights and experience from my 20s with the added perspective of appreciating that my time is finite.
Hell no lmao
I got married young, couldn’t imagine being single at this age.
I don’t know how you would get statistics, but I don’t think most men have the kinds of options that would make being single fun. Many will want to have children early enough in life that they can see their grandchildren grow to be adults. Also, of course, a failed relationship can ruin a man financially, and many are afraid of that risk.
Dunno, spent my whole 30s in a relationship and it was awesome. If the relationship wasn’t awesome I could def see wanting to be single instead.
No I would prefer to be in a committed relationship. However I also don’t want to plan my entire life around my girlfriend.
Eh no. I had a period of a few years single from like 33-36 and it got old fast. It wasn’t lack of sex either, I never had a problem hooking up when needed. But the lack of intimacy, both physical and emotional bites hard after a while. I like having my person that I can come home to at the end of the day, eat dinner with then cuddle on the couch for a while.
I sewed my wild oats in my 20s. Hooking up gets old. I started dating my wife when I was 30. So far so good.
Being able to do whatever you want whenever is a breadth of fresh air. There is something to be said for sharing your joys in life with a significant other.