What is your opinion of remaining uncommitted to being married to raise a family in a stable environment? One one hand you can focus on yourself and have a very gratifying life, enjoying many partners and freedoms, on the other you can explore a satisfying and stable life while experiencing traditional fatherhood.
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I’m leaning towards freedom in general. Settling down is not for me.
Whichever you want
I’d prefer freedom to a restrictive and toxic marriage but I’d prefer a good mutually supportive marriage to just having options to have sex with different women. Also statistically people in committed relationships have more sex than single people.
Freedom until a certain age then settle down. You don’t want to be 70 and living alone with no wife or kids. (Or grand kids).
I would say that a good family will make a man out of you. Roaming is easy until it’s not
Freedom until a certain age then settle down. You don’t want to be 70 and living alone with no wife or kids. (Or grand kids).
Do what feels right to you. I’ve been happily married for 20 years and that’s enough for me. No kids I hasten to add.
Older you get more it doesn’t matter. Plus you’re old anyway. It’s a fantasy. Commit to the fam.
Family life. Because I don’t have so much skills to have a lot of girls. Also find a love for rest of your life is the greatest thing ever happened to me. And has child is also great and hard at the same time.
Are you an adult or a child?
This is like asking, ‘Should I eat a healthy diet and exercise — or sit on the sofa eating chocolate and playing computer games all day?’
All new interactions are ‘exciting’ because they’re new.
They all eventually become ‘normal’ — even great relationships. This is when a relationship actually starts.
Chasing after the ‘buzz’ of new relationships indicates gross emotional maturity and correlates with failure in every other field of life.
Successful adults are defined by discipline and the ability to commit to people, tasks and processes.
You can have both it’s called ethical non monogamy
Don’t do it.
Even if not for the sexual freedom, but just freedom in general.
Having a family is resource draining, and not to mention if you lose the partner lottery and they end up being a dirt bag.
I know there are many people who swear by their partners, and would have it any other way, and there’s an equal amount in miserable living situations.
It’s not worth it – your time will never be your own and your resources will never be your own.
I think your posting fantasy here. If you have no desire for kids and a family life then the question is irrelevant. If you have a desire for kids and family life again rhe question is irrelevant.
Porque no Los dos?
Find you a partner that understands sex is just sex, one that accepts that even if you have sex with others, it doesn’t mean you’re any less committed to them?
Open marriages require work, communication, and a lot of honesty. I think it’s possible for most people to find a relationship that’s so secure that can support such an arrangement.
The more you have, the shallower you experience. Quantity doesn’t define quality, actually usually decreases it. But quality doesn’t increase just because the quantity is low.
Many people look so lost when they have ‘a very gratifying life’. I don’t think everyone should marry and father a child, no. But everyone should understand what they want correctly, without trying to make it up to their past experiences.
I don’t care if you marry or not, there are cases where one marries to satisfy the society’s expectations. One can marry because they don’t have the ability to attract many towards themselves. Commiting because you can’t have a good non-committing life is not what I am talking about.
A good committed relationship is peace and joy. Doesn’t have the stress of being on the move constantly. You don’t migrate. You don’t cling and lose all the time or you don’t act out of stress of loss.
Unless you come from a society where this is the norm. Then you can be compatible to this kind of life, as you view the relationships differently and this is a genuine mindset.
The problem is, culture acts like an OS for a human system. It is very hard to totally override it. Many people act like they are completely different from the society they were born to, but an overwhelming amount of them are not. Those are upset with what society has to offer and they can’t find themselves in it. They try to act like they are completely different, which is also not true in those cases though they are incompatible at the same time. So they live the life unfulfilled. They chase, but they can’t ‘have’.
So there is not any definitive answer. Most of the time people are trying to live a non-committed life because of what they couldn’t find, not because they didn’t wish for it even in their unconscious mind. Yet again, commitment for the sake of it isn’t working either.
Why not both?
people do both, swinging clubs are everywhere. Frankly i think its a bad idea but its way more common than you’d think.
If you are raising a family (and doing your fair share) you won’t have much time for sexual freedom anyways. Also – you can have both if you talk about it well ahead of time and find someone cool with it.
We live in a world today where Family life is not as rewarding to a man in the long run. That life isn’t profitable to a suit a man’s best interest at all as he Invest his time, energy and effort into it. It has become more of a liability issue or loss profit than anything. By doing so is asking one to go on a suicide mission. It has become a Depreciated Asset in a man’s life.
As to Uncommitted Freedom was the best options now for any man. To avoid unnecessary liabilities, extra fees for massive responsibilities and accountability. It’s not the greatest, but to play it safe and at least just break even to avoid any loss. It’s better for them at least not owe debt by living very minimal to just their essential needs and still able to protect themselves.
Just like the economy. No point for a man to expand to a size of growing a family when he doesn’t have the capacity to support it or it’ll just drain him to death by unnecessary things. So it’s better to minimize and cut back. Owning a house with a bunch of bills and responsibilities through the roof or renting without having to worry about much about the place besides having to pay the rental bill only and move places to places freely. That’s what most men pick now and days. To be able to maneuver freely with not obstacle burden.
Swinger life with an awesome partner that understands you (obviously not for everyone).
One day, you will be old and ugly.
And that will change nothing on the love of your partner and your kids. You will be the most important person for them.
That can’t be guaranteed for men and women who decide not to start a family.
A good partner adds meaning, family is a trap imo.
Enjoy your teens and 20s, if you want a family late 20s early 30s you should really start to settle down a bit, it’s not impossible after that, but it is harder.
Just get a surrogate and an egg donor. Problem solved, you got your kid and can continue that bachelor lifestyle.
I think we cannot consider it as choosing either black or white. You can start a family, then after a certain time, want to experience something else and then want to settle down, etc…
We do not die how we are born. We, our mind, our desires, our body change continuously.
At that point, we should identify what is important for us and be respectful to other people around us, while realizing our priorities.
All my single friends in our 30s wish they had a stable home and or kids. Idk man all of a sudden they just regret partying and sleeping with 304s
The only benefit of a relationship is if you want to raise kids. And when the kids are pre-teens and above there is no need for the relationship either.
It literally has no benefits over being single. None.
If you have freedom you want a family. With a family you want freedom. Humans being humans.