Ive put on weight myself over the years and now im a bigger guy and I am fine with it. I have had people both online and in the real world (although mostly online) offer comments and advice on my weight without me asking for it.
Does anyone else feel like they want to just be left to being heavy without others commenting on it, and to lose it if you decide it’s the right thing. I get that heath is a factor and some people just want to help but how do you feel about these comments being offered without being asked?
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I’m not that overweight, personally, but I feel the same way about it as I do with unsolicited medical advice, particularly in regards to my diabetes.
Which is to say I don’t give a shit that you think eating cinnamon or whatever is what I should be doing.
People should mind their own business.
Well – when you say you are „fine“ with it, so you mean you are content with it and want to look that way, or have you resigned yourself to it?
I am technically morbidly obese but clearly im not.
When I actually was morbidly obese because I was a fat fuck no one said anything. You gotta be like “your weight is going to kill you” heavy to have people saying stuff.
I’m a bigger guy, and I honestly don’t think I’ve ever had someone just randomly give me unsolicited advice. If the topic of conversation naturally turns to health, exercise, or weight, then sure, people have shared tips or mentioned what worked for them, but that’s about it. I’m not saying it isn’t happening to you, but it does make me wonder what kind of people you’re around, whether in person or online, who would bring that up out of nowhere. If someone gives advice because the topic came up, I get that they’re probably just trying to help, and that’s fine. But if it’s completely out of the blue, that’s just strange.
Also, I don’t know anyone who would push back if I simply said something like “thanks for the tip, but I actually feel pretty comfortable at this weight.” Most people I know would just respect that and move on.
If you’re comfortable with yourself, tell them to mind their own business. Or say, “Aye, well interesting, what you doing about yer mess of a fizog?”
If you mention it online, it will be commented on. If you don’t like it, don’t mention it. Simple.
If you’re ok with it, good on you. If people mention it in public, they’re the jerk… But if you bring it up, then it’s on you.
If they are family or close friends, then they are just worried you are going to die earlier than you have to. With that said, it shouldn’t be more than once if you are not willing to make changes. Not okay with coworkers or anyone else I’m not close to.
I think being overweight shows a lack of poor character and discipline. As a man you should be taking care of yourself and your health. If you can’t even be bothered to look after yourself what else Will you be unwilling to do?
Personally, if you’re ok with how you look, there is nothing wrong with that. It will probably always be the case that you will get comments on it because that’s just how people are. I used to be a much bigger dude, and I hated it because I never felt comfortable in my own skin and while most people wouldn’t comment on my weight, there were always some individuals that would.
I will say though, now that I am at a lower weight range, people just comment on other stuff. I’m a quieter guy sometimes so I’ve gotten a fair amount of comments about being quiet. I’ve also gotten comments on the other end of the spectrum about my weight being too low. No matter what people will pick at something about you that stands out, and I don’t think they intend to come off rude or anything, but I do feel you when you say you are comfortable with who you are and their comments are unnecessary. Unfortunately, I don’t think those comments are ever going to go away fully. Just have to brush them off, or tell them “thanks for the unsolicited advice, but I’m good!”
You be you, until your size impacts others
If you need part of my seat on a plane I will not be happy, until then I wish you a happy life
I tend to follow the rule that people’s life choices are there own, they will have to handle the consequences on there own so why bring it up unless explicitly asked.
I’m skinny not as skinny as I’ve been but most people don’t see this as the same. But I think it would be rude to unprompted tell people that smoking is dangerous and offer ways to stop, mf we know smoking is dangerous mind your business.
People whose opening comment suggests they think you don’t know why you’re fat are tool bags.
“Just don’t eat [super basic list like high calorie, high fat, candy, etc].”
I truly think that a lot of excess weight is emotional/mental health related. [Effectively]Telling someone you think that they’re an idiot is bad for their mental health.
If we’re inline at the grocery store then it’s none of my business.
If you’re spilling over into my seat on an airplane then your weight is an issue.
I would never pass comment on someone else’s body. It’s uncivil and rude. I would not like it done to me, so I give the same consideration to others. I think people who do this are unkind, and I’d lose respect for them if I ever had any in the first place.
A friend once asked me about some sneakers/trainers and I replied with “I know they have them for large guys.” He said he had never been referred to as large, only big or heavy, and was impressed. Now, that was a solicited comment; I think any unsolicited comment (good/bad) is unhelpful, bordering on rude, and best ignored completely.
(And, at 6 inches taller than me, he was in fact “large.” 🙂
My dad had that attitude. He died earlier than he should have. I know it’s uncomfortable to hear about it, and I agree unsolicited comments are shitty, but please take care of yourself.
You can be whatever weight you want!
Human beings have their biases and you can’t change that, you can only choose to control your own reactions. It’s also worth mentioning that there are health implications of excess weight, but that depends on genetics and exactly how much weight we’re talking about.
But ultimately, you do you! This is your own “choose your own adventure” 😁
I don’t have an issue if I’m overweight because I’m jacked but I’d have an issue if I was overweight because I’m fat.
Honestly when I was fat I got called names and stuff now that I’m skinny now I’m on drugs lmfaooo
“I know more about fitness and nutrition than almost anybody, thanks to people like you.”
Been getting this crap from people since puberty. “Yer a big boy why don’t you hit the gym? You could be a monster!” I’m not even that big. Just have a little extra fat.
I’m in your camp. I’ll put on 15 pounds every few years (or every year). Family or friends might mention I’m getting a little thick. And it’s appreciated and helps me want to make a change. Eight weeks of a diet, and it’s gone.
If it looks like I’m slacking off at work, I hope my boss will tell me. If my wife wants more attention, I hope she tells me.
And the same with my health. “That’s the 3rd head of lettuce you asked me to buy that you didn’t make a single salad from”… Mention it. If I’m not showing up at boxing practice or the gym enough, I need to hear about it.