See I understand the concept of what it’s about, but people need to stop saying that shit every time there’s a breakup or rejection in a way of consoling someone cause honestly it pisses that person off. Whenever someone says those words, like obviously I’ve been loving myself my whole life and that’s why now I wanna see how others could love me.
If those words they say are some kind of a closure I think it’s just them being too cowardly and creating a wall around themselves to feel comfortable, after a breakup
Imo just accept the fact that you broke up and move on, I know it hurts but that’s just life.
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Honestly though, since you’re making this thread, it looks like you probably do need to start loving yourself before your next relationship.
I hate it when people say love yourself in general honestly
Also it’s easier to Love yourself when someone accepts you as a flawed being first , peoples don’t want to admit that either
agreed. loving yourself is optional. gatekeeping loving others because you cant liove yourself is dumb and dangerous.
Is it wrong though? I think when people say that it’s not so much a question of self-love but more about learning to live alone and be content with it, you can’t know when you’ll meet someone new, so the best thing is still to know how to live without needing another person and work on yourself to be ready and healthy the day you meet someone else. But I grant you, I’ve been there too and it’s quite annoying but it’s the best advice in this situation
It’s also blatantly not true, it sort of implies that people who are insecure are less loveable than those who are very secure in themselves and ‘love themselves’. I know tons of people who struggle with loving themselves, I don’t love them any less for it …
Someone who has been loving themselves their whole life wouldn’t need to post this unless they know they still need to hear it, just saying
I get what they’re saying when they say that I don’t think it’s coming from a place of malice but i just can’t love myself even though I’m currently taking steps to lose weight dress better ect. I just can’t even if I looked like Henry Cavill or Brad Pitt I’d probably feel the same way
Don’t worry. There’s plenty more fish in the sea.
I find it to be more advice than consolidation.
Its not to make you feel better, but tongive you a goal to work towards.
It can be obnoxious tho
We let other people treat us the way we think we deserve to be treated. I used to say the same thing but now I realize I put myself in a lot of shitty relationships and I put up with a lot because I was looking for love.
As someone who’s been in a healthy and happy relationship for the last 4 years, you’re right! You don’t need to fully love yourself first, I’m still learning!
You just need to act like someone who does. By not accepting being treated poorly or not being someone who denies themselves of kind treatment because it’s not what they think they deserve.
To do this I just asked myself “would I let my daughter be treated this way?” It really helps see things in a different light.
I’ve learned if you don’t love yourself, it’s not just romantic interests who will walk over you, everyone will. And it’s actually quite easy to tell who does and doesn’t love themselves.
People who lack self assurance and self respect especially the latter, are deprived from self love.
It’s a polite way of saying you need to work on yourself. If people say it to you it means that you’re the problem and need to change. I hope this helps.
Famous Rupaul quote.
You know what’s funny? I was at my most confident when I met my ex. Had my dream job, great friends, awesome hobbies. Still got ghosted after 6 months. Sometimes it’s just not about you at all.
Also it’s 100% possible to love someone and be loved without loving yourself