I recently got a WRX that I’ve basically been saving up for since I was like 20,I’m 33 now, got the blue paint job like the old rally car, stanced with flared arches and everything. Literally my dream car since I was a kid. But my girl wants to drive it and she’s insistent and in my brain I’m like no, absolutely no one will ever drive this car except for me, how do I say that in nice terms?
Comments
Is she an irresponsible driver?
yes
I mean, just tell her. If it’s super duper important to you, she ought to be understanding of that, and if she’s not, that’s a her problem
Just what you said!
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tell her it’s not even about her, it’s about how much that car means to u personally. like u spent over a decade dreaming of it and finally got it, it’s okay to wanna keep it for urself. if she loves u she’ll understand it’s not a diss, it’s just u protecting something u’ve worked your ass off for. ppl always try to make it deep but sometimes it’s just about boundaries. u can offer to take her for a drive instead, make it a lil experience together or sum.
“I would prefer that you not drive my brand new dream car.”
if i were in ur shoes i would let them drive around a parking lot if they really want the experience. or the burbs. just something easy. if you have a good relationship with your partner you should just be honest and tell her that the car means too much to you to let other people drive it. my boyfriend also has a car that means a lot to him and i understand his boundaries with it.
Has she driven a manual before? Successfully?
Unless you fear that she’s going to wreck it, I don’t see why you wouldn’t let her drive it, even with supervision.
I can understand finally getting your dream car, but if there’s no worry that she’s going to ruin it, I don’t see any other reason to not allow her to drive it other than the good ol’ “But I don’t wanna”.
Me personally, if I finally got my dream car, I’d want my SO to drive it and be able to enjoy it just like I get to.
if she paid half of it, she’s entitled..if not, tell her, its your car.
This is coming from an old guy- if you love your car more than you do her then PLEASE do her the favor of dumping her before she falls in love with you! She can find someone who really loves her, and she deserves that.
Idk, I just bought a Z4 and the first thing I asked my boyfriend was if he wanted to drive it.
Yes it’s my fucking dream car… but I knew he was a little envious. I know he isn’t an irresponsible driver. And I knew it would mean the world to him if I just let him take it around the block and he’d never ask again.
Just tell them it’s not permitted by your insurance policy.
“no”
It’s a risk to let someone not on your insurance policy drive it. Even if they’re a great driver. You never know what could happen! It’s not personal, it’s just the truth.
Women are better drivers than men. No question. Look at the statistics and check insurance rates by gender. I think age may level it out later in life.
“Im sorry baby but you’re not covered on my
Insurance and if something -did- happen I’d just be ass out and you’d get a huge ticket.”
Just be up front. Let her know.
It took you 13 years to afford a Subaru? Wait till you gotta buy new head gaskets!
“I would prefer that ypu not drive my brand new dream car”
It would depend on whether both people sacrificed for this. Did her life change because of this? Were there things you didn’t do to save the money? If so, just tell her you would like to end things.
I can imagine saying someone shouldn’t drive the car because they can’t drive a stick or whatever but this just seems like a silly way to create resentment
Just tell her, “Babe, haven’t you ever loved something more than me? It’s like that.”
Then she’ll understand.
I’ve definitely had relationships where my SO didn’t want me driving his vehicle, or a particular vehicle, and it wasn’t a deal breaker. The fact that you don’t want ANYONE driving it but you helps, because it’s not like you distrust her specifically. You probably should’ve brought it up the first time she said something, though.
My dream car was a full size high-top van and my wife is terrified to drive it
I understand not letting anyone just drive your car. But its a new car.
Don’t know how long you’ve been with her. She probably saw how happy you were with it. This seems like a moment she wants to share with you.
Why wouldn’t you want to share that moment.
After that moment. Then tell here you don’t want anyone driving your dream car.
Which honestly will show her just how much she really means to you!
But never letting her drive it just cuz it’s your dream car. That just sends a message the car more important than she will ever be.
But maybe that the point. The car more important to you than the relationship.
Horrible.
An exhausting mentality. Share the joy. Let her drive when you’re with her.
sorry babe but its not insured for another driver.
Keep car keys away
Just tell her no one drives you dream car but you. If its that big of a deal then say it.
My wife and I both have separate cars. She has curbed every wheel on hers. Hit the side of the garage etc.
So I don’t let her drive my car since I would be pretty annoyed if she did that to mine. And she knows this so doesn’t want to drive it either.
She has a key and can drive it if she really needed to in an emergency or something.
“If anything happened to this car, even if it wasn’t your fault, I wouldn’t want that to hang over our relationship. I would want me to be the only one in my mind I could blame. It might be a little immature, but I’d rather be immature now rather than make a mistake later”
So you don’t trust her enough to drive your car?
But you trust her enough to not bite your dick off when you put it in her mouth?
My husband would be stoked if I wanted to drive our WRX. The stanced bullshit though? Lameeeeee sounds like your one of those guys with a fancy car but can’t actually drive and its all for show and certainly would never do any proper drifting/cool shit in it.
This is the kind of thing you make a point of mentioning before you buy the thing. Her wanting to drive it, and being ‘insistent’, does she have her own car etc,
If i was with someone i would assume i could drive their vehicle, not in a ‘i prefer yours’ sort of way but ‘instead of you putting your shoes on, backing your car out, me getting in my car backing out, you driving back in, and then us doing the opposite the next morning because you start earlier than i do’ yadda yadda, i am just going to use your car to go grab us dinner.
She will curb the wheels of your dream car and then vehemently deny that it could have possibly been her. To the point that you have to let it go or risk divorce. You will hear, “you love that car more than me” Ask me how I know…
My spouse finally got his dream truck that he’s been dying to get for about a decade. He’s very gently spoken with me about how he would prefer that I don’t drive it for errands/work, but we also have two other vehicles that are our usual commuters. And I prefer my nimble vehicle compared to a clunky truck.
I get it. It’s his baby, and while we use it as a truck is supposed to be used, it makes him happy to be the one to primarily drive it and baby it as he sees fit.
On roadtrips, this preference evaporates, so he can take his turns being a passenger princess and nap.
Either you’ll get over it, she’ll get over it, or you’ll both be over it. Good luck!
This is how cars get wrecked and you as the owner get stuck with the bill and the fallout.
My wife drives my vehicles, but only once we had been together, and she demonstrated her ability. Really, once we got married, now that I think about it.
I do not allow anyone else on the planet to drive my cars at all, for any reason, ever. Period. More risk than I’m willing to accept. If someone wants to drive one of whatever I’ve got, go to a dealer and buy one.
I get that it’s your dream car… but what is more important to you, your wife or your car?
I won’t let you drive my car.
You have to choose between me and the car, then.
You will be missed.
“The car represents a big personal goal for me, and I’m going to be weird about other people driving it for a while. I know it’s dumb. I’m sorry in advance.”
Stop playing around, and just tell your partner that you care more about the car than her. Be sure to include that you aren’t mature enough to be in an adult relationship because you haven’t yet learned how to share your toys. You’d rather keep the nice things to yourself.
I mean, fuck your partner’s enjoyment in sharing a fun thing with you, right?
Your replies in the comments have provided zero reason to believe she cannot be trusted with this. You just don’t want to see someone else enjoying your shiny new thing.
Can your gf drive manual? If not, problem solved.
I had a 2020 WRX I bought brand new and within a month of having it my wife dinged my passenger door opening her door too quickly and not paying attention. I was mad for a minute, but in the end it’s a car it’s going to get dings just from driving around. Maybe just let her drive it after you’ve had it for a bit and the novelty wears off
“Babe, my ass has imprinted a groove on the drivers seat that makes it perfect for me. If you were to drive it, my ass groove would be forever tarnished and the car would no longer feel like it is mine. You asking to drive this car is like me asking to wash my hands with our decoration soaps, it is just not meant to be done.”
“No.”
Don’t be a dick. If you can’t let her drive it, she’ll find someone who will. AND they’ll encourage her to hit the 2-step.
Married: that’s what insurance is for, let her drive it.
Not married: h to the no. Don’t rush your car OR your insurance.
Is she on the insurance? Does she have a clean license and a good driving record? Does she drive a standard responsibly (The WRX is a standard transmission, of course) ? Or can you teach her on a different standard car?
You’re 33 and this is the stuff you worry about?
Kiss her straight on the lips and give her the keys! Let’s rock this. If this is YOUR girl that is.
Just say it. Go ahead and explain to your significant other that you love your dream car more than you could ever love her and for that reason alone you cannot to allow her to drive your car.
I’m laughing here, it’s just a gdam Suburu. Act like it’s an Aston Martin. in which case, I’d make my lady put on a beautiful dress and drive me to dinner!
She deserves better…imagine getting blocked by a Subaru??? Please screen shot this and send it to her so she breaks up with u!
Tell them you made massive savings in your insurance by not including a second driver. Promise to share the saving with her by taking her out to dinner or something.
Own it. Just be like hell no dawg ain’t nobody drivin this baby but me.
I think it’s attractive when they drive my car?
I let my girlfriend drive my Subaru shortly after I got it but before we were “official”. I trusted her completely. Some guy complimented her on it and she goes “thanks, it’s my boyfriends.” We were then official and a few years later she bought her own. Now we’ve been together for 12 years, I still have that Subaru and today we just looked at buying a 2025 WRX TS. Good things happen when you love people more than things.