I mean if you have nothing to Show off. Is it any achievement or looks or an interesting life. If you lack all of these things how do people act confident?
How can someone gain confidence if he has nothing to be confident about?
r/AskMen
I mean if you have nothing to Show off. Is it any achievement or looks or an interesting life. If you lack all of these things how do people act confident?
Comments
Fake it till you make it, seriously. Confidence will help to attract some of the things you mention, so “bootstrap” your way to real confidence. Just don’t be arrogant, you can be confident and humble.
Do something to be confident about
You work on yourself until you have something to be proud of.
You don’t have to have something to show off to feel confident. You can be proud of not being a complete fuckup.
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Having confidence without anything to back it up is like believing you can drive forever if you just don’t look at the fuel gauge.
You build confidence by creating proof that you are confident. Do challenging things, do the things you tell yourself and I would argue that is 90% of the way
“Fake it til you make it.” Eventually you’ll even have yourself convinced.
Confidence can just be fake it till you make it. It’s a mental game that only you have control over.
Confidence comes from competence.
You aren’t confident because you have no reason to feel confident and it sounds like you’re looking for a quick fix but there isn’t one.
You need to learn to accept yourself where you are and acknowledge that life a marathon not a sprint and it’s going to take a conscious effort to feel confident.
You need to get good at something, become self reliant, and figure out who you truly are in the process; not who you think people want you to be but who you truly are at your core. That takes a lot of work and self reflection.
Once you know who you are, and you’re on your mission/purpose in life, and you have confidence in your skills and ability to provide for yourself and others as a man, then you will start to feel confident.
Fake it till you make it. That’s honestly what most people do.
Starts small, and always keeps pushing a bit more.
Consistency leads to progress which leads to results which leads to confidence.
It could be anything, drawing, running, lifting, bowling, etc. start doing something you are interested in, invest in it by doing it consistently, get better and you will be fine.
As others pointed out… your answer is in the question. Find something that you can work at and suck at and build skill in.
Then you will be confident in it.
ALSO: This is a critical lesson I’ve learned in life and teach the kids and new adults who come into wrestling and jiu jitsu…
You have stepped onto a mat to try something new, that is hard, and that you WILL get beat at. Repeatedly. By doing so you have now done something 98% of the rest of the world will never, ever do. Be proud of that.
Whether it’s martial arts, painting, music, programming, crafting skill or anything else.. the sheer of act of doing and failing should make you proud.
Anyway, best of luck man.
I used to have this issue. I was ashamed of myself and couldn’t bring myself to have many social interactions, because everyone would see I was a loser. It took me a long time of working on the things about myself and my life that I was ashamed over to be able to feel good about myself. No therapy, no telling myself I was good enough or that everyone has struggles had any effect on my self-esteem. If you want to be confident, figure out what would make you feel more confident and put work into doing that thing – whether its your appearance, your dead-end job, your lack of relatable interests – whatever it is, you should probably figure out how to improve those things in your life because you will feel better and people will like you more.
Wisdom gives real confidence.
Someone who doesn’t have confidence has probably been through a lot. Look back on some of those hardships and tell yourself that you fucking did it
You made it here and jumped through those hurdles.
Find things you care about and make small goals towards a much larger goal so that you can be proud of the progress you made.
Find something that you enjoy that you would like to talk about. Share it with others. Learn to juggle, host friends over for games or movies, get a puppy and take him/her to the park.
Start achieving short term goals, then mid, then large… whatever makes you feel happy and fullfilled. It will show up in your confidence.
Whose definition of “something to be confident about” are you using? If you are trying to use the opinions of others then you’re gonna be on a long, futile journey that will inevitably take a toll on your self-esteem. Real confidence comes from being happy with you, not the things you have. Plenty of people who you would assume have every reason to be confident and are not.
Here’s the thing, mate: there’s confidence, and then there’s arrogance. Most folks claim they’re acting confidently when they’re actually being arrogant—full of bravado, you name it. Confidence is having trust in yourself, standing your ground, and facing the crazy world we live in without being obnoxious. You hold your position with strength and calm.But what we see most nowadays isn’t confidence—it’s plain arrogance. Pushing others down to feel better about yourself, shoving someone on the street, swearing at people for no good reason—that’s arrogance and bravado, not confidence. Force is a tool, not a toy to play with. Men need to be strong and confident.You’re a man; build your life. If you’re unhappy, you have the power to change and forge a new path. Confidence and power come from growing, taking risks, and making decisions. Trust yourself. Life has its highs and lows—it can be tough, but that’s what builds your confidence: facing your fears and worries, standing tall, learning, and growing. You’ll feel stronger and more confident because you’ve tackled your own challenges. Your life is yours—it’s your property and your duty.Hope that helps, mate.
You just walk into the room. Stand up tall. Assert yourself.
Hit the gym, learn a new skill, be a good person
Start by saying no.
if you have life you everything. you have been fooled into thinking you hsve nothing.
I have been trying to figure out this all of my life since I am super Nihilistic and never have confidence.
They really do just fake it. They are actually figuring things out on the fly and doing it well.
How can I and others do that same thing? Not really sure haven’t figured that part out.
If you suck stop sucking. All this fake it till you make it bullshit, and “it’s within” all that shit is bullshit. You can have all the confidence in the world but if you are inept your confidence is going to make you look like a self absorbed retard.
If you wanna be confident be someone who should be. Work at stuff, it takes time.
Eventually, you’ll come to learn that it’s really about having strong work ethic and resilience that is the essence of where pride and confidence comes from.
Achievements that come along the way are great, but those will be the cherry on top of just living a life of good principles.
You can be confident about anything there is no “nothing to be confident about”
You’ve just got a loser mentality so lose that and you’ll start being confident
Start working out. It’s one of the easiest ways to build confidence. You will start to feel better/stronger, and over time you’ll start to look better. Even if it’s pushups every morning or every night. Be consistent and watch how things change.
Confidence is not about logically connecting it to something just so you could be confident.
There are literally 5 year olds that have insane confidence, so, do they connect it to a life achievement or good looks? No, because they don’t even know what those two mean 😄
Confidence is just being okay with what you got, you can always gain achievements, muscle mass and even more interesting personality, but at the end of the day you gotta understand that it comes from within, all of the crazy social norms and media just brainwash us to create insecurities, when in reality, we truly are enough and are worthy to be loved and respected.