TIFU for having a thing with a tv show

I was 12 when Paw Patrol stopped being a kids’ show and started being my awakening.

I don’t know when it began—maybe the moment Chase said, “These paws uphold the law,” and looked straight through my soul. Something inside me snapped. Not in a bad way. In a paw-sitive way. I started binging every episode like a cult member decoding scripture.

But then… then I started feeling things.

Rubble’s voice made my knees weak. Marshall’s chaotic energy? Irresistible. I began to dream of them. Long, sweaty dreams where the pups and I went on “missions,” if you know what I mean. And by the time I reached Season 3, I had assigned each pup a love language.

I bought a dog collar. Not for a pet—for me. I started crawling around the house barking “Paw Patrol is on a roll!” with zero irony. I got banned from PetSmart for “inappropriate howling.” My grandma caught me licking a plush Chase doll and made me go to church. Didn’t help. I just started calling God “Ryder.”

One day, I stared into the mirror, fully suited in pup gear, peanut butter in hand, and I whispered, “No job’s too big… no pup’s too small…”

And that’s when I knew: I had gone too far.

But I regret nothing.

TL:DR: having a thing with the tv show characters