My work has a cantina in the break room of snacks and drinks. We’re not really allowed to leave the job site while on break so they put it in there and hired some people to keep it stocked up. Plus I work night shift, and it’s a little hard to DoorDash takeout at 3am.
I’m not very trusting of it, the company has a running problem of stocking up with days old expired goods that have visible mold you only notice after you already buy it and realize you’ve wasted your precious 6 dollars on a moldy little cup of cheese cubes and you’re still hungry but damn that tiny ass little cup of cheese cubes was 6 bucks and do you really want to spend more money on this dinky little worksite cantina? The answer is probably no, so you starve like the good little wage slave you are.
Anyways. I was pretty hungry yesterday so I thought “damn that kinder bueno bar is looking kinda good rn….” So ya know, I assumed my workplace wouldnt have 8 month expired candy in its little cubby, especially considering those little bars get restocked pretty often and there’s NO way that something so out of date could be on that shelf, right?
WRONG.
Bought that overpriced little bar, sat down at my little chair in the back corner and got to work. There was like some white dust in there but I figured it was fine because sometimes wrapped chocolate bars have that. Yknow om nom nom I love my kinder bueno chocolate bar.
So I go to throw away the package and I look at the expiry date by chance and I had an “oh damn” moment because man.
October 2024.
It’s MAY.
MAY 2025.
So I figured “oh I’m sure it’ll be fine, this stuff is full of chemicals and preservatives and I’ve eaten expired stuff on accident before, I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
WRONG AGAIN.
I woke up and I haven’t left the toilet since. Anything that comes out of me is liquid and my stomach keeps cramping and seizing like there’s a bunch of kids throwing those little pocket fire crackers in my colon. I fear getting up and putting on pants because I fear one little fart will ruin my whole day. I have to go back to work in a few hours and I’m out of sick time. I have bills to pay man I cant just stay home on the warm and welcoming white ring of my toilet. I feel like those people who ate sugar free gummy bears. I think I’m dying.
TL;DR
Workplace cantina stockers have a history of stocking expired items, thought there was no way one of the items they stock up most would be expired since October 2024, and now my toilet is paying the price for my shitty decision. Yeehaw.
Comments
That’s one crappy way to waste a $6 candy bar, I mean eight frigging months expired?! No wonder you’re paying the price in the toilet!
Ouch.. I once had 5 year out of date fish sauce. I actually started to see things/hallucinate
Chocolate doesn’t have expiry dates, it has best before dates. It’s completely safe to eat things after the best before, it just tastes worse. The white dust is the fats in the chocolate- that tends to seperate itself from the mix over time, which is why it tastes bad.
So good(?) news, either you got the food poisoning from elsewhere or your intestines had a very bad reaction to the fats. Probably the latter if you’re pooping way more than vomiting. You have my utmost sympathy anon, it really sucks, get better soon!
Talk about a shitty situation.
This whole thing stinks.
How can your company even allow this crap?
Chocolate doesn’t really expire in a way that would make you ill. The expiration is more of a optimal freshness and taste guide. I’d be more concerned about the storage of it than the expiration.
I once ate a chocolate waffer candy that was 7 years past expiration. I noticed thd date sfter I finished it. Nothin happened to me thank god lol.
I’ve had expired chocolate on multiple occasions and I’ve never gotten sick. The whiteish layer on the top of old chocolate happens when cocoa butter separates and rises to the surface of the chocolate. It’s safe to eat.
You probably got food poisoning from something else. What did you have for breakfast? Did you break apart the chocolate bar with your hands and did you wash your hands beforehand?
i’m very skeptical of this – i’ve eaten chocolate bars i’ve had in my desk since before covid. they may taste a little stale but that’s about it.
More likely just bad timing. People have eaten chocolate that’s over 100 years old. As long as the wrapper is intact a chocolate bar 6 months past the date is not gonna make you sick.
once I ate Nutella that expired 1.5 years ago, nothing happened