Friend called me a baby for wanting my mom to stay with me after a suicide attempt

r/

Basically I had a suicide attempt a few days ago and was in the hospital. I got home again on the weekend and I was still feeling weird from medication and even tho I wasn’t at risk anymore and promised I wouldn’t do it again, I really thought my mom would stay with me. Like I’m not spoiled but at least on a day like that she could’ve gotten me some food or given me company. But she took my little brothers to the park for like the majority of the day. They do that every weekend. I know it shouldn’t bother me but it does. It kinda made me feel like she didn’t even care. I wondered if they still would’ve gone if I had died. I know that’s stupid.

Anyway I kinda ranted a bit about it to my friend but he just called me a baby and all, saying I don’t need my mom cuz I’m 17 (almost 18). I feel weird for still needing my mom. But isn’t it justified in a situation like this? It’s not like I wasn’t fine on my own but I just didn’t want to be alone.

Comments

  1. DefyingGrafity Avatar

    You won’t always have your mom. Tell your (ex) friend they can fuck right off.

  2. CatLover1039 Avatar

    You’re still very young. Moms are very important and every child needs one. Your friend is immature for saying that 

  3. didntwant2joinreddit Avatar

    If one of my kids went through something like that I think they would have difficulty getting me out of the room ever again while I hugged them and looked over them.

    Sending internet Mum hugs and suggesting you perhaps have a look at your support network around you and consider what you need in your recovery and ongoing into a healthy and happy future.

  4. The_Donkey1 Avatar

    I’m in my 40s & my mom… In summary.. is sick & has months to live. When I was your age I didn’t want anything to do with my parents so I sort of get it, but those people might not even be in your life 10 yrs from now. Tell them to eat a dick. Spend as much time as possible with your mom.

  5. Egbert_64 Avatar

    Just call mom and say you need her.

  6. Buffalo-Empty Avatar

    I’m 29 and I still need my mom. She held me while I cried both times I found out I was pregnant.

    I’ll probably be an old wrinkly lady before I don’t need my mom- and even then I’ll still probably need her.

  7. laurex2010 Avatar

    “Friend”

  8. Thin_Rip8995 Avatar

    you’re not a baby
    you’re a human being who just went through something that could’ve ended your life and wanted your mom
    that’s not weakness
    that’s instinct

    and your friend?
    completely missed the mark
    probably because they’re too emotionally stunted to admit they’d want the same thing if it were them

    you’re allowed to feel hurt
    you’re allowed to need comfort
    and you’re absolutely allowed to expect more than being left alone with your thoughts right after a suicide attempt

    this isn’t about being spoiled
    it’s about wanting someone to show up when it matters
    you’re not crazy for that
    you’re just tired of pretending it’s fine when it’s not

  9. pqxrtpopp Avatar

    you were sick; naturally our body calls for our primary caregiver when we were growing up when we’re sick. I’m sorry you went through that and your mom kinda failed in being a mom in this case and you friend failed in being a friend in this moment. I hope you feel better soon, and when you do, you’ll find better people who will care for you and care about you 🫶🏼

  10. munchumonfumbleuzar Avatar

    Hi, I’m 39 and I absolutely still need my mom. Needing your mom is human thing, not a baby thing.

  11. Simpasff Avatar

    Your “friend” sucks at being a friend. Being close to or turning 18 does not grant you the magical powers of being a mature, fully grown and developed adult. I consider the vast majority of 18 and 19 year olds to still be children. It’s okay to need your mom at this age, in fact it makes perfect sense. My mom passed when I was 9, I’m grown now and dammit where the hell is she? I need her every single day. A mother’s love is something anyone with their head screwed on right needs. I’m sorry your mom did not stay to look after you and comfort you after such a devastating and scary experience. My son has been having increasing mental health issues and I fear each day that he will end up in your shoes. I would never let him out of my sight if he did that. I’m no mom (just a lame dad) but I’m sending you the biggest hug ever, and I hope you’re doing okay. Don’t you ever give up, you’ve still got so much to live for that you just haven’t even seen yet. I believe in you!

  12. fugleeduckling Avatar

    I hope my kids always need and want me at any age ❤️ you’re not a baby.

  13. NotMrsHolland Avatar

    Hey OP,

    First, I just want to say you being here today is a big deal. Surviving something like that at 17 takes an inner strength you probably don’t even realise you have. You matter. You are worthy of love, support, and a future that feels safe and full of hope.

    What your mum did is not a reflection of your worth, it’s about her limitations, not your value. Some people, even parents, just don’t have the emotional tools to show up when we need them most. That doesn’t make it right, but it also doesn’t define your story.

    I’m nearly 40 and my mum is my best friend and I can’t imagine going through anything like this without her, I still need her. Things do get better, even when it feels impossible to see past the pain. People will come into your life who show you what real love, respect, and support look like. Please hold onto that thought when things feel heavy.

    Your friend’s behaviour sounds immature and hurtful. It’s OK to outgrow people like that. Protect your peace first, anyone who can’t handle that doesn’t deserve space in your life right now.

    You are not alone. There are people out there who care, even strangers like me. You’re still at the very beginning of your journey, and I truly believe you have so much life worth living ahead of you.

    Keep going. You deserve to see the days that feel lighter.

  14. NaturesVividPictures Avatar

    Most girls and women want their mom with them during traumatic times. Believe me when I gave birth both times, my mom was with me. Moms are very important. Your friend sucks.

  15. brownxheap Avatar

    You need new friends

  16. ChickenScratchCoffee Avatar

    Everyone has their own life to live. She can’t stop taking care of her little children to stay home and be with you. I don’t think you’re a “baby” but I think you’re being unrealistic. Life moves on with or without you.

  17. angelicpastry Avatar

    You will never be to old to need your mother. She won’t always be here. Your friend is stuck in that mindset of “were getting older, were not supposed to need our parents!” Honey I promise you your “friend” is full of it. Misery loves company and she’s trying to get you to join her in that regard if she’s that type of person.

  18. FullBlownPanic Avatar

    You don’t age out of wanting your mom when you are going through something. But you do learn that sometimes our parents aren’t always there when we need them and we learn to adapt. I’m sorry you have to adapt. Your friend likely hasn’t gone through something so traumatic, or has issues with their own parents.

    I went through something very similar when I was a kid. My mom dropped me at my grandma’s for a week and didn’t visit me. I was devastated. I think she needed a break. It was a lot for her to absorb and things in our house were already not great.

    Looking back now I can see how it happened and I mostly forgive her. But feeling abandoned like that when I was 16/17? It was DEVASTATING.

    Please remember, you are not alone, even when you feel most alone. Take one step at a time, a single step is easy, don’t let the appearance of the depression mountain fool you.

  19. General_Road_7952 Avatar

    My mom died when I was 30, and I would still want to have her with me at 59 if I had a hospitalization for any reason

  20. Kemps Avatar

    My friend, I’m a 40 year old guy and sometimes I still need my mum. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I talk to my childhood stuffed toy. Doesn’t always help, but sometimes it just puts my feet back on the ground. If you need something when you’re in a vulnerable, emotional state, you need it – and no-one should mock you or anything otherwise.

    I’m not trying to defend your mums actions here – maybe they just don’t understand how to help in this situation. Your friend though? Not a friend at all.

  21. Ginger630 Avatar

    You’re still a minor. Of course you want your mom. This person isn’t a friend.

  22. seasalt-and-stars Avatar

    I have a son your age. I’d say to him exactly what I’m telling you: your “friend” can screw right off.. seriously.

    Please consider going with your mom on the outings. Even if you don’t feel your best, tag along. You need it. If you’re still low on energy, you can take a seat on the park bench. Notice your senses, stay present, breathe in the open air. Listen to the birds singing. Smell the spring flowers. Fresh cut grass. Listen for your brothers’ giggling. Slurp up some sunshine.

    With younger kids your mom has a lot going on, plus she’s concerned about you. In your own way, tell your mom that you’d like to have more time with her. It’s understandable for you to be feeling needy right now.

    I imagine she, too, would appreciate more closeness. Consider working together with meal prep, help with clean up, dishes, folding laundry, etc. Those slow-paced moments oftentimes hold the best conversations! Also board games, jigsaw puzzles, crafts, etc.

    You are a dear human. You’re experiencing a rough patch, so wanting/needing support from loved ones is to be expected.

    Your friend doesn’t understand, or else they wouldn’t be critical of your desire for closeness. Maybe take a break from them for a little bit, regroup, and then reevaluate your relationships with friends. Keep those that are positive + present, those that lift you up, and are there for you, give meaningful advice, etc.

    You are strong. You are capable. You’re a good person. You are loved, and you are NOT alone.

    ❤️‍🩹

  23. rebelmumma Avatar

    Your friend isn’t a friend. But if you want your mum to spend time with you, please talk to her. She isn’t a mind reader and probably thinks that you want space.

  24. Picnut Avatar

    (( hugs from a mom )) You are only 17. I am so sorry you don’t have the support you deserve. Everyone should have been there for you.

  25. Prog_Failure Avatar

    Your friend is just immature. That’s the kind of thing an edgy teenager would say.

  26. dkofthemilkyway Avatar

    There is nothing wrong with needing your mom. This is a natural feeling for some people and there is nothing wrong with it. Also, your friend is just plain wrong. You are never too old to feel that way. I was 38 when my mom sadly lost her battle with Cancer. She’s been gone a few years and I still struggle with this feeling. Also, as someone who has attempted this myself, I am glad to hear that you are OK for now. I’m sorry you are having to go through all of this.

  27. Ky3031 Avatar

    I’m 23 and have three chronic illnesses. On my bad days I go crawl into my mom’s bed because I hate being sick alone. Get better friends.

  28. Princapessa Avatar

    i am 28 and i still need my mom! we live states away but i know if i needed her she would move heaven and earth to be there for me. when i was 19 i was in a bad car wreck and was taken to the hospital in an ambulance, they wouldn’t call my mom for me because they said i was an adult.(notoriously bad hospital) my friend who was also in the car wreck and at the same hospital had her mom call mine. i was about 2 hours away from home yet my mom was there somehow in less than an hour. i am so so sorry that your mom abandoned you in that way when you needed her and i am even more sorry that your stupid friend was shaming you for feeling hurt about it. i would be hurt by that at any age. you never grow out of wanting your moms care at least sometimes. you deserve to be nurtured and cared for always but especially after something like this.