Four months ago my husband (31) left me (F29) and his 2 children (2 and 4) without warning for a cam girl he met online. We have not heard from him since. I have filed divorce proceedings and child support but the court is dragging it’s feet. When we married, he forbade me to have friends and moved us to a small southern town, population 450. He was the breadwinner and I stayed home and cared for children and the house.
Since his departure we have been severely struggling and I don’t know wtd anymore. I’ve had to hire an attorney, pay mortgage and utilities (even though we’ve been without power for a few days twice) and can afford to only eat 3× wkly bc my kids come first. It’s hell. I feel like my entire life has been turned upside down and don’t even have time to grieve. I have no family left to take my children for a few months so I can take the steps to improve our lives and definitely don’t want to put them in a foster home but I feel stuck. If it was just me, I could survive off the bare minimum but…Sometimes they only get one meal a day and that’s just not the life I want for my children. I feel so damn alone and have absolutely no one to call for advice or to simply just vent. My nerves have been so bad lately I’ve developed stomach ulcers.
I’d like to get us back to my hometown but it seems like an impossibility atm. I have absolutely no intentions whatsoever in ever rekindling anything with my ex. I’m actively looking for a second job or side hustle preferably from home, bc daycare is astronomical and would cost the entire second paycheck anyway…wth do I do? Any and all advice will be so appreciated bc I’m so lost 😭💔
**I’m posting from my secondary acct bc my ex doesn’t know this one
Comments
I think I could possibly find some help for you and your family. Reach out to me and I will help with whatever I can. Thank you
Move to a blue state with benefits for single moms
Where are you? Feel free to DM. Help is waiting
I know this not a big thing. You need to keep track of your mortgage payments. So if he comes after home. You can show them the mortgage payments you made
For a camgirl….bleed him dry. Im sure you’ll spend his money more wisely
If you have family and friends back in your home town, reach out and ask for help? Maybe they can support your move, lend some money, come pick you up, etc?
have you tried food banks? that at least helps in the now
edit – if youre in the US – i would also get on a few section 8 waitlists
I am so sorry. Local churches might help. Your town social services could link you up with food stamps and tell you about any other available resources, limited though they might be in such a small area. You don’t have family that could get plane tickets for you and the 2 little ones? Or give you gas money to go home?? It’s not like your husband can contest the move if he’s not around or in contact with you at all. Ask your attorney about emergency maintenance. Did your husband leave his job to go live with a sex worker??
Check for a local food bank and see if they have any rules. Sometimes, they might just need a phone bill or water bill to prove you live in the area. Also, go on FB for the local area. Also, check out the app next door. Doesn’t hurt to call the local churches if they can’t help directly they should be able to direct you to someone who can.
Good luck.
As far as a job goes did you have a particular skillset prior, I can only speak from the IT side of things because there are different types of hybrid work across different skill lvls that should net you a decent income if you’re somewhat familiar with basic fundamentals
Apply for food stamps and visit a local food pantry. That will help a lot with the food. Most of the recipients are working poor like you who simply can’t make ends meet because of the world we live in. If you Google daycare help you might find a program for your kids like head start. If you have people in your home town who could help watch your kids, do everything you can to move back. Hall the national domestic violence Hotline. It’s anonymous and they can connect you with local resources. You did experience emotional and financial abuse and they’ll be happy to help you. ❤️
You let him do all that and now you feel sorry. Move on, life is tough.
I hope everything will go smoothly for you and your family
What country are you from? Doesn’t the state help you?
I’ve read almost this exact post before, if this is genuine I really hope you are doing ok.
DM’d you details on assistance
Sell house regroup, down size
File for emergency food stamps for you and both children immediately. Request for them to be expedited. Call the power company, explain your situation, and find out about how to apply for the LIHEAP and other hardship programs that will cover your power bills to prevent it being shut off.
Reach out to a domestic violence network.
If he kept you away from being able to control your own finances then it could fall under financial abuse or coercive control and they could assist you
He ded i say u he ded
Screenshot everything log down anytime she’s away and every little detail starting now.