A lot of people get quit, nervous, scared and that’s usually what people think of when you say anxiety. I get very irritable, and snappy. I’m usually a very calm relaxed kinda guy.. but I’ve been a jerk without really meaning to. I don’t get this way very often.. but a lot of people don’t understand it’s a reaction to being anxious as fuck.
I yell at people at work, which its in a kitchen. So it’s not really crazy that people yell at each other there. I’ve been snappy with friends as well, just being rude and irritable. I always feel so bad afterwards and usually apologize after once I’ve calmed down. But I keep doing it. I don’t mean to.. I don’t want to. I just get so overwhelmed and over stimulated sometimes and get extremely frustrated. I just wanna scream when I get anxious.
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Not sure if it will work for you, but what helps me is when I get anxious is to go to my happy place, look up the happy place in the movie Happy Gilmore. I make my own version of that when I’m anxious and makes me be able to breathe a little easier.
If your anxiety is starting to affect your life like this, it might be worth talking to a doctor for medication to help manage your anxiety or therapy to help find healthy coping mechanisms.
Are you aware that you are anxious before you start snapping at people? Sometimes just acknowledging to yourself that you are feeling anxious can calm the anxiety, allow you to just accept the feeling as “It sucks, but here we are,” or at least put you on alert to be extra careful when speaking to people.
If you are not aware in the moment that you are anxious, you may need some help. Maybe a therapist, maybe just a friend who can tell you, with a promise of no retaliation, when you are getting snappy. Then take an inventory of physical sensations. Are certain muscles tight? Do you feel anything in your chest or gut that is different from when you are content? Anxiety has physical manifestations that can help you identify it.
Also, learning to notice when you’re anxious before you snap at people can help you figure out what you’re anxious about. Sometimes just knowing the reason is enough to reduce the anxiety. If you can’t figure it out on your own, maybe some counseling can help.
It’s great that you are concerned about treating people well, and I hope you’ll include yourself in that group. Anxiety isn’t physically healthy for you, even if you manage to still be nice to everyone. It can cause all kinds of physical ailments that will cost more to treat down the road, and that will reduce your quality of life.
I hope this helps!
I’ve had to send flowers to my dentist for being so bad. I once went to my mom’s doctor, yup follow up apology letter. I am so bad when anxious.
Is it weird I’m glad I’m not alone?