The other day at work a guy made a joke to another guy about how if his wife made a mistake with their new baby he’d “beat the hell out of her”. I looked at him straight in the face while he was snickering at his own comment and said quite loudly “Wow. That’s really funny. Nothing like a good joke about HURTING WOMEN. I LOVE beating wives jokes. You’re really funny talking about HURTING YOUR WIFE.”
The guy literally ran away. It was glorious.
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Asking men to repeat the shitty things they say twice or three times as if you hadn’t heard them is very fun
I’ve found that no response is the best response.
That… doesn’t sound like a joke. Terrifying
I haven’t heard such a joke for a very long time but most of my co-workers are women and they don’t joke about domestic violence or violence against women. At least two of my co-workers were victims of domestic violence. They have talked about it which is why I know.
I’m also a fan of “I don’t get the joke, explain it.”
“Can I be part of the joke? I like a good laugh, but I need you to explain to me what is funny about assaulting and hurting someone you love.”
Yup. Agreeing sarcastically and loudly or asking them to explain is the best entertainment
You should have said , did you beat the baby, too? Because THAT would have been even funnier!
I’m going to use this as a a man if I ever have the misfortune of meeting a man like that
I’ve gotten a lot of milage out of “wait, I don’t get it”, and making them explain the joke
“Wow I wonder if HR has heard that joke”
Tell him to launch into the dead baby jokes next.
This seems like an opportune moment to share that my son calls men’s tank tops “wife lovers.” He’s a great kid. Man.
After a certain age you can change to a low, cold voice and say, “Try that shit with me old man and I will put you on the ground.”
I just tell them I don’t want any part in their sick fetish, that they obviously get off to telling strangers they beat their wife.
I love hitting men with ‘What do you mean?’ when they say something bigoted (it’s not always men, but it mostly is).
They’re then faced with two options –
Explain the shitty thing you just said, so that I and everyone else around know what a dickhead you are.
Go silent because you’ve been challenged and know what you said was fucking stupid, so that I and everyone else around know what a dickhead you are.
There is also a secret third option where I unhinge my jaw and devour them, but I’ve been trying to do less of that recently.
Flip side: imagine being vulnerable with a new baby at home. And the man you had this baby with is causally joking with people about “beating the hell out of you”
That’s more horrific than any Ari Aster film
A few weeks ago, it was still icy out, and I saw this older man trying to help an older woman off the ground. So I walked over there and I asked if they needed any help.
And he said something to the effect of what type of gun he would use to put her down.
I just looked at him and I tried to help the lady, but she said she was OK. Honestly, it was shocking to the point that I didn’t even know what to say. I watched them a bit longer from my place but nothing notable happened.
I went through a pretty bad divorce from someone I eventually realized was very toxic… this sort of thing would never even cross my mind let alone to use it as with joke to a stranger. It’s sad.
“Oh that’s funny! I get the joke, because how could a man like you get a wife! Hahaha.”
Is the joke the shock value?
How horrible the teller must be?
Neither is very shocking lol, but the explanations are pretty thin until you get to hate and sexism, not that they’re prepared for that conversation
Reliable way to chase em off ladies
Don’t ignore or pander to their bs
The era of “harmless” idiots is over
He literally ran away huh
Probably a damn good chance dude wasn’t joking. Abusers do this thing where they “joke” about their intentions in broad daylight, as a way to “groom” their friends and colleagues. Then when the wife complains about being beaten, the friends are like “George? He would never! He’s such a funny guy!”
You are my hero. Seriously.
Fuck the people who defend the joke tellers when the punchline is essentially just ‘rape’.
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I don’t know if this was cited before, but i heard it from Mary Poppins, the Uncle Albert scene : “There’s nothing like a good joke. And that was nothing like a good joke.”
I love to hit them with ‘i don’t get it, why is that funny?’. They can never explain why because it would require them to say ‘i think the idea of beating a woman is funny’. Just like racist and homophobic jokes. Works everytime.
I usually deadpan something like “Yup, there’s nothing as funny as violence against women.”
I think I would say something along the lines of “ my father used to beat my mother, and you’re right it was an absolute riot as a child to watch that happen! I’m so glad you’re going to continue this great tradition with your wife and children”. Then just turn around and walk away.
I like asking them to explain it.
Well, who’s going to take care of the new baby? 🤔
I’ve been a fan of that. I’m sorry I don’t understand method.
I’m so sorry I don’t get that joke.
Could you explain to me? why is beating your wife funny?
Basically, running the joke into the ground is always a great way to strip it of its humor. Ask a ton of questions to understand it, keep talking about how funny he is, keep repeating the punchline, tell him how happy you are that someone is carrying a torch for preteen edgy humor. Whatever creative way you can come up with to entertain yourself.
Really beat the joke to a pulp. I hear he likes that!
Might not work on sociopaths, but i like the gist.
You work with sociopaths
Eh, this seems like every single woman who ever hears a wife beating joke. I’ve never seen it work, the men just giggle about how triggered or emotional you are or how maybe your husband needs to beat you more.
Saw a post a long while back about a woman who started asking the men to explain the joke to them in a sincere tone. It works magiacally, theres no emotion for them to make fun of and they feel stupid that their joke is so bad it doesn’t sound like a joke. Its embarassing for them.
I like to go with not laughing and asking them to explain why it’s supposed to be funny.
Insecure people always trying to put others down to make themselves feel better
Love the response, make these people reflect on their misogyny. That shit shouldn’t be comfortable for them.
I don’t think I understand the joke part. Was the joke that he would reveal himself to be psychopath (like he would be if true)?
I don’t understand a world where you are exposed to one coworker’s statement about beating women. I must be privileged and insulated. Damn
What? Who tf makes jokes like that? That’s not even close to being funny.
I don’t understand why there are men who joke about that. I have a varied sense of humor but I don’t find jokes of that nature funny. More worrisome than anything.
Recently I finally had the courage to do something similar to this to my rather feminist father when he cracked some misogynistic joke. It was fantastic watching him realize he was being an asshole and almost magical how quickly he wanted out of a conversation he started
Another good one is forcing them to explain why it’s funny.
“I don’t get it. What’s the joke? Please explain it to me. Why is beating your wife funny?”
No outrage, no desired reaction, just a flat, cold “please explain the joke to me.”
Also works on any bystanders who laughed along.
Am a guy, that is not a joke. It’s just a psychopath showing his colors and this is from someone who enjoys sexist humor (either gender). Like, it probably was a statement of fact
Perhaps he’d like to explain the joke to HR……
There are about 45 people in my department and it’s almost all women. That being said, I can’t imagine any of our male employees making a “joke” like that.
I’ve recently shut someone down who back peddled with the “It’s just a joke,” after he said he wanter to water cannon and rubber bullet peaceful protestors with, “I don’t think violence against innocent people is funny. Shooting people isn’t funny.”
Honestly, I think I had the courage to say it because of this subreddit. Y’all talk about how you are able to shut bull shit down, like you did OP, and I had the tools to say the right thing.
“Well now you’re just ruining all the fun. Why can’t you take a joke?”
I work a retail job, about a year ago I got a black eye from a women’s softball game I was playing in. Several times some middle aged white man would say “Were you talking when you should have been listening?!” Expecting me to laugh like it was the funniest thing ever. I was horrified, I had NEVER heard that expression and I wish I had seen this post then, I was just too stunned to say anything. It was terrible.
🏆 You go, OP. I always think of the comebacks 15 minutes later. SO glad this douche had words of sanity slap him in the face.
Should have asked if that’s how he meets his deductible on his insurance
Playing dumb and asking them to explain the joke works wonders.
“Yeah. Last one that tried that with me got run out at gunpoint while he was crying to his mommy. I see you, dude.”
Let them announce themselves! Saves us some effort.
I hate to say this…. But he’s definitely not joking. He’s probably beating her if he’s able to say it so casually.
It’s a humblebrag, not a joke. He’s tossing himself off at the thought of his sexual and physical prowess, his submissive wife being the ultimate symbol of success. He’s passing it off as a joke because it’s rude to boast.
I would probably joke about CPS being called.
Wtf is wrong with him?? Who tf jokes about beating the mother of their child?
That’s a HR complaint and a wellfare check request with the police.
I’m confused at what the joke is. Someone makes a mistake and the response is to beat the shit of them? How is that funny?
I like to play dumb and have them explain “the joke”