We are married for three years and we love each other. We have an okay sex life. He has a below average cock and can’t last long but I never cared about it or made him uncomfortable about it.
We were also trying to have a baby and found out he is infertile couple of months ago. Last week he confessed he always like that kind of porn, and he decided this is what he wants after the news. He wants to watch me with another men, and possibly turn it into a long-term thing.
I had a hyper-sexual phase before him in college, but never wanted more than what he could give to me. I’m confused now as I’m somewhat aroused but unsure if this will end well or not. I could be okay with it as long as things are smooth because our sexual life is not the greatest.
Anyone had a similar experience from any of the sides? What happens now, what’s the next step?
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Give it a shot.
I’ll tell you what now, tell him you have a confession. Tell him you slept with someone you just met. If he gets angry then he doesn’t really want it. If he wants deets and forgives you it may actually be his bag. Just confess that the confession was a ruse to see how he really feels about it.
Do it.
Are you familiar with the Cassie and diddy trial
No man who shares his wife actually cares for her.
Is this the life you really want? I’m sorry but don’t become his new little fetish. Porn has warped his mind.
Make sure he really wants this. Try to think of everything that could go wrong, and run it by him.
You’re both young – this will end soon. He’s probably gay too
You should both see other men.
Well, you’re too young to be married, I’d say try it and if it doesn’t work out, at least you’re young enough to start over with someone normal lmao
When you say below average, how small are we taking about?
I get why men want this, probably because of porn conditioning, but I don’t understand the women who go along with it.
Do you really want your husband just watching while you’re with someone else? Are you actually attracted to that? Would you still respect him? Do you think he truly respects you?
Go to a sex therapist
Your inbox is gonna get a lot of dicks I think
Honestly, I think it won’t matter if you do or not. Sounds like your incompatible; you wants kids-he can’t have them-and at some point his lack of “skills” will affect your marriage.
Unless you absolutely KNOW you can go the next 30+ years unsatisfied in the bedroom with no kids…
This is a porn fueled fantasy that doesn’t work out in real life.. 95% of relationships that start out monogamous and are subsequently opened end in failure. Opening a relationship doesn’t usually solve problems, it usually causes em. Infertility is another issue here. What now? Couples counseling… hoping to avoid the inevitable divorce.
I had one of these in college, OP. It won’t work
The thing that’s important about how he brought it up is that it didn’t include your feelings first. Did he ask if you’ve been unsatisfied lately? Or if you feel like you want more sex that he can’t provide? Just saying he wants you to fuck other people in front of him is fetishizing you, and that will not end well. He may choose a friend or someone you know to come over for sex that you don’t want.
If this isn’t something you’re VERY into, don’t do it. Honestly this probably means the marriage is not a good fit, and you are so young do not waste your life with a man who doesn’t satisfy you, there is much better out there.
For the love of god, please ignore the sex-negative things here. The idea he doesn’t care about you or himself is preposterous
This is similar to having open relationships and/or 3somes. It works for some couples, and destroys relationships for others.
It’s easy to fantasize about something. It’s another thing to deal with the reality of it.
I’ve never dealt with it, but I’ve seen men and women become very jealous of 3rd party participants, and sometimes it was the person who came up with the idea.
The next step is to come up with rules such as “both of you must agree to whoever the 3rd party is”.
Another rule should be that if either of you decide it’s not fun then it’s over.
Once all the rules are in place it’s time to find the 3rd party.
PS: I think there are subreddits devoted to this that may be better suited to give advice about what rules/agreements to have in place.
Perfect. Please ask him to join r/creatine
That can go really really bad.