So my MIL has gotten on my wife’s and mine last nerve. Both my parents are dead so the only living grandparents are them. But I can’t deal with her anymore. I want my kids to have a relationship with her but I can’t be around her. She lives out of state so she comes up a few times a year to stay with us. My wife and I dread the day she comes up. But she is disrespectful and self centered. So how do I have my kids maintain a relationship with her? Im not sure where to go from here. Any suggestions or advice would be appreciated.
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Why do you want her to have a relationship with your kids?
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Why do you want your children to have a relationship with her? At some point, no grandparents is ok.
Honestly, it sounds like you need to set some boundaries. If having her stay at your place is too much, maybe suggest she stays at a nearby hotel or with another relative when she visits. You can still facilitate the relationship between her and the kids without sacrificing your own sanity. Your home shouldn’t feel like a stress zone just because she’s around.
Set boundaries, limit interactions to kid-centric activities, and consider video calls between visits. Honestly, your kids will probably figure out she’s toxic anyway.
So you can’t stand her, your wife can’t stand her, but you want to subject your kids to her (checks notes) disrespect and selfishness….mmmm, and why would you do that? Where’s the value to your kids?