Hi yall,
So i just needed some advice. me and my friend who hasn’t had sex in 2 years have been ig seeing eachother the past 2 weeks. we kissed twice prior to this weekend. so as u can tell things were getting serious. We had a great time making out, was talking dirty to her, using my hands i think she finished im not sure or was very close too, her legs were shaking like crazy and he was getting loud. then she started to go down on me. during that whole like 30min session of foreplay i was hard the whole time. then we both agreed to have sex. as soon as i’m about to put it in i get soft. I felt bad but she was understanding. but i felt really bad, i was up for 24 hours and i had some drinks in me. so maybe that’s why. in past relationships i never had this problem, accept for the first time with my ex but it was smooth sailing ever since. so im worried about our next time happening probably this week so i was wondering if anyone had any tips on how i could stay hard. i didnt feel nervous or anything but i guess my body did. now i feel like theres more pressure on me for next time.
Tl:dr i was making out with a friend and was about to have sex, as soon as i was ready to put it in i became soft, need advice
Comments
Are you having second thoughts about your guy’s relationships? Thinking too much? I know sometimes thinking too much during sex about other things can make you go soft.
Or maybe you just aren’t too sure about things? You mentioned your ex and how it felt normal, could it also be that maybe you are expecting her to be the same and when it came to be it wasn’t the same?
Cock ring. Just don’t fall asleep with it on passed out drunk or your dick will fall off. Literally.
First, Why This Happens (You’re Not Alone)
Getting soft right before sex, especially during a first-time experience with someone new, is super common and nothing to be ashamed of. Here are some reasons it may have happened:
You’re human. This doesn’t mean something is broken.
Now, Let’s Talk Cock Rings
A cock ring is a stretchy or firm ring that fits around the base of your penis (or penis + testicles). Its purpose is to trap blood in the penis, helping you stay harder longer and sometimes enhancing sensation.
Why it might help you:
How to use one (safely):
If you go this route, make it part of the play… not a fix to a “problem.” You could say:
“I thought it’d be fun to try something new… it helps with sensation and makes things more intense.”
That frames it positively, and reinforces the connection.
Final Tools You Might Consider
<3 From ER Nurse. Tough love with a trauma kit and whose husband is a proud ring user too.
Probs tired.
Probably more so just performance jitters or anxiety about being hard mate.
Maybe try again when you aren’t as tired and not too much alcohol and try best to relax.
Nothing wrong with you mate. Just the brain being silly I bet