I’m aware that this title sounds crazy but I don’t know how else to explain this experience/how I feel. I am a feminist and I know that being a woman and/or having a uterus is not dirty or something to be ashamed of, however every time I read things about my body/having a uterus or menstrual cycle all of the language being about ‘preparing for potential pregnancy’ / releasing eggs etc gives me such a primal disgust and uncomfortability. Ever since I can remember i have had no desire to ever be pregnant and it’s such a horrifying thought to me. I am a lesbian and it’s never been an issue of it actually being a possibility luckily. I see other feminists celebrate how our bodies are magical and we should feel proud of being able to create life but the idea of my body actively working overtime every single month preparing/wanting me to carry a child is so disgusting to me, it’s like this entire part of my routine/body exists to tell me my purpose is to give birth. Does anyone else feel this way/have any advice on how to get past it? I’m not afraid or judgemental on anyone else being pregnant but it makes me really angry that my body personally takes up so much resources for something I never want.
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This might not be the same thing, but I get irrationally angry that we have to sleep. To be completely honest, it’s a mix of fear and resentment.
Your don’t want kids and resent the cycle that only exists to create and birth a child. I think that’s pretty understandable, actually. Perhaps your disgust stems from your body having this capability, like you’re being forced to live an experience you didn’t ask for and don’t want? Idk if I’m wording that right.
I’ve no experience with this and I’m not trying to sound dramatic, but if I felt like you did, I’d strongly consider getting surgery to stop this whole cycle nonsense.
I get so mad that I have to eat several times a day. Like girl, you were just fed 3 hours ago, why are you hungry already?? If I could be a snake and eat once a fortnight, I would.
I think your uterus and my stomach are just doing what they were built to do. But I don’t think they define who we are as people. They don’t run the show! We are not the things that we can do, we are the things that we choose to do! I hope that helps you to reframe and come at it from a different angle.
I mean I don’t feel like it’s misogynistic exactly but it feels incredibly unfair. I don’t want children and never have. I didn’t ask for the incredible amount of pain it comes with. When I was younger I felt like I was paying for something I didn’t do.
And the idea of carrying a child is definitely scary, the fact that my body would do something without my permission (I’m straight) is mildly traumatizing (furthered by the fact that I have been pregnant).