I just found out from my 16 year old sister who still lives at home with our parents that my dad had an affair with my mom a few months ago.
My sisters message to me: 👇🏻
“I know I probably shouldn’t be saying anything but I don’t care. I was right. Dad had an affair a few months ago. He literally cheated on mom. That’s why they started going to therapy and everything. That’s why it’s been so weird. I never would’ve thought that would happen but idk how to keep it to myself. Like ik it’s probably wrong telling you and that it’s something they never wanted to bring up to either of us but I’m just so distraught. It happened months ago so ig they are getting better now but I guess dad used an excuse of the bread route being stressful to do that. This is why I have trust issues. Because what do you mean that he thought that was a good idea. I’m too damn nosey but idfk how to talk to it about other than you. I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t have said anything but that’s probably a key player to why I’ve felt so disconnected from them, because they were going through all that.”
I have no words after I found out. Like I’m happily over a year married to my wonderful husband. Like how am I supposed to react after hearing this shocking information about my dad who I thought I could trust?? Like my parent’s relationship is the reason I married my husband who is my high school sweetheart. My parents are also high school sweethearts, they just celebrated 25 years married today May 20th. Like wtf ?? How am I supposed to look and trust my dad after hearing this information?
My parents got married in a Catholic church so I wanna hope and pray that’s the reason they’re working together to make their marriage work after the affair. But man I don’t know how to go about my day after hearing that bombshell tbh. So here I am , asking strangers on the internet… I’ll take what’s said with a grain of salt.
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Backup of the post’s body: I just found out from my 16 year old sister who still lives at home with our parents that my dad had an affair with my mom a few months ago.
My sisters message to me: 👇🏻
“I know I probably shouldn’t be saying anything but I don’t care. I was right. Dad had an affair a few months ago. He literally cheated on mom. That’s why they started going to therapy and everything. That’s why it’s been so weird. I never would’ve thought that would happen but idk how to keep it to myself. Like ik it’s probably wrong telling you and that it’s something they never wanted to bring up to either of us but I’m just so distraught. It happened months ago so ig they are getting better now but I guess dad used an excuse of the bread route being stressful to do that. This is why I have trust issues. Because what do you mean that he thought that was a good idea. I’m too damn nosey but idfk how to talk to it about other than you. I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t have said anything but that’s probably a key player to why I’ve felt so disconnected from them, because they were going through all that.”
I have no words after I found out. Like I’m happily over a year married to my wonderful husband. Like how am I supposed to react after hearing this shocking information about my dad who I thought I could trust?? Like my parent’s relationship is the reason I married my husband who is my high school sweetheart. My parents are also high school sweethearts, they just celebrated 25 years married today May 20th. Like wtf ?? How am I supposed to look and trust my dad after hearing this information?
My parents got married in a Catholic church so I wanna hope and pray that’s the reason they’re working together to make their marriage work after the affair. But man I don’t know how to go about my day after hearing that bombshell tbh. So here I am , asking strangers on the internet… I’ll take what’s said with a grain of salt.
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Wow, I’m really sorry you and your sister are going through this. That’s such a heavy thing to hear, and your reaction is 100% valid. It’s hard when someone you’ve looked up to especially a parent makes a decision that shatters your trust. Your sister was brave for telling you; she clearly needed someone to lean on, and you’re a safe space for her.
The fact that your parents are in therapy shows they’re trying to work through it, but that doesn’t erase the pain or the confusion. You’re allowed to take time to process this and figure out what trust looks like going forward.
And just a reminder what happened in their marriage doesn’t take away from the love and commitment you’ve built in your own. Your relationship with your husband is yours, and it’s still strong and beautiful.
You’re doing your best, and you’re not alone in this.