Pretty old and boring question but like I’m 20 rn ik not too old but I have never ever gotten any compliments for literally anything from anyone. Okay parents do say some good things but all of us know that it’s because I’m their child. Like I see women women complimenting a lot more than men. I do accept that I am an average human since birth but not even one compliments in 20 yrs? Is it that hard to get ? I’m not begging to hear people say good things about me but never have I ever seen even my male friends getting good words from others.
Why is it that men receive no compliments at all?
r/AskMen
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The guys who receive compliments aren’t complaining, thus giving the illusion that non dude gets them. It’s like why you rarely hear non toxic relationships online: people in healthy relationships don’t feel the need to talk about how healthy their relationship is.
Be the change you want to see brother. Start complimenting your bros or people you see on the street, guaranteed you make a few people smile that way.
I’ve heard other men say this, not to me though. I’m a compliment-giver. Not fake platitudes. Legit things. I think we should all compliment each other more.
I receive compliments
Give your friends compliments and they’ll give you compliments.
At work me and the guys compliment eachother when we notice effort went in. It’s nice to hear ‘bad ass haircut!’ Or ‘I like that shirt, looking sharp.’
We’re ugly construction workers, so it feels good.
unfortunately a lot of times I compliment men they take it instantly as me showing interest in them/ flirting so I avoid it most of them or I just clarify that it’s a simple compliment and I have no bigger intentions behind it
Lots of men receive compliments. But there are many social reasons that men often don’t. Other men are too lost in stupid ideas of what masculinity means. Some people feel men have too much of an ego already – nobody compliments someone who compliments themselves already. And sometimes there isn’t anything to compliment. You have to stand out in some way to get a compliment. Also you may simply not be spending time with people who are kind enough to compliment.
Get into really great shape and this will potentially change for you.
My theory is that women have a shorter shelf life with their good looks and fertility, so they received more compliments to boost their confidence. They have to strike while the iron is hot so to speak. Men, meanwhile can still have a lower but more consistent attractiveness in to their middle aged years.
I also notice that women seem to give compliments to each other as a sign of friendliness and non-competition. I like your blouse is a sign of non-aggression.
Some women are afraid of attracting unnecessary attention from men due to their ability to physical dominate them.
Are you friends with women? If not, do you compliment your male friends?
It’s usually about the type of relationship.
Partly because society has become more crass, partly because masculinity is a weird thing to define with a lot of people who have rigid viewpoints on it, and partly because men aren’t known to give compliments without expecting a transactional response. What I am saying is that the perception of men giving compliments is that they might be expecting sex. Honestly, that IS the case many times.
So, here is what you might do, selflessly give compliments to people on a regular basis. You might be shocked to find that you start receiving compliments back. Don’t be creepy about it, find someone who is effortlessly sociable and friendly, watch how they interact with people. One thing you will surely notice is that every time they get a chance to build someone up, even in casual ribbing, they will do it. They will also deflect insults or denigrating comments to themselves. It is subtle, but noticeable. Those guys get compliments all the time.
We men are badly socialized right now. Not all of us, but in general the failures of many of us to launch is less about a problem inherent to men, and more of a problem inherent to how we were socialized as young boys and men to integrate with our society. It might seem like a lot of things have changed, not really, not in this sense. We have had the term ‘gentleman’ (and by that they absolutely did mean gentle) long before any of us were alive. Emotionally moderated, sensible, well read, and well skilled men have been a feature of society for a very long time. This overly macho silliness, this ‘Rogan bro’ culture we have now, the WWE inspired way we talk to each other, this is all fairly new. The results are predictable, boys are aggressive and socialize badly, they don’t get anywhere good with that strategy, all of the sudden ‘boys are in crisis’ and we blame the boys and not the adults that raised them poorly.
A lot of guys will see a compliment from a woman as romantic interest, even when it isn’t. Women dont want to lead a guy on so they dont give compliments that often unless the guy is 100% “safe” and they know it won’t be taken the wrong way, from what I’ve noticed.
Guys usually dont compliment each other because its beaten into us to not show vulnerability of any sort, complimenting their personality usually required opening up emotionally, complimenting them physically is more often than not met with accusations of homosexuality.
This is just my experience, how often do you compliment your bros? And if youre wanting compliments from women, ask yourself if its romantic attention youre wanting instead, otherwise why doesnt it matter the gender.
It’s gotta be you. Compliments are earned most of the time, I never got a compliment for stepping out and looking like shit, I’ve gotten compliments when I look well taken care of and am in shape with my hair looking good.
Men doesn’t deserve them… You’re welcome 💋
When you say “compliments,” are you referring to a romantic attraction thing? Which ideally would need to come from whoever you prefer. So, it would depend on the way you present yourself to them. If you mean in a professional setting, that would be subject to possibly how competent you are in a chosen profession. If you mean from friends, I would say in general men are taught/imprinted to suppress emotions to others. This is also an old perception, that is slowly being eroded, thankfully. I will give more compliments to female friends than male, however, it also depends on the level of friendship. I have a best friend that I absolutely never discuss feelings/emotion with, so telling him “his hair looks good today” will never happen. But, I have other acquaintances I could tell they “look like they are working out or lost weight,” without issue.
Because they can’t just say thanks and walk away. I hey assume if it’s a Girl complementing them. That’s she’s willing to sleep with them too.
Men aren’t really told how to dress fashionably or how to choose a decent haircut, if you do that you’ll be bound to get more compliments
Sometimes all it takes is a nod.
Be fit, develop your wardrobe and smell nice.. be consistent with those foundational habits and your compliments will be a bit more frequent.
Probably won’t break any records but it’s a start.
Your style will draw compliments after your manners/kindness gets you noticed.
But being appreciated for your kindness is not a compliment it’s just a courtesy.
The compliment comes after your presence is felt.
Example:
You: Holding the door for an older person.
Them: Thanks young man; you’re looking sharp by the way.
That is not how it works. You know your own worth. That’s good enough. Never play that game.
On my first year of university, some girl from my class randomly told me I had a beautiful smile (I wore braces as a teenager to correct my teeth, at a time in my country where not everyone could afford them). I still remember that compliment all these years later…
Weird. I semi-regularly get compliments and I’m not a super attractive dude. But I have started dressing more for myself than to just fit in, and that’s part of it.
I started giving compliment to other men years ago – about their work, attire, cars, music, something they did and so on.
I’ve noticed that women in general are becoming more and more anti-social, scared and hateful of men. So I took upon myself the heavy burden of spreading some positivity, giving compliments to other men and being a decent human being overall.
Society trains women to seek validation, and men to receive none.
It is simply your duty to exist and provide. We used to provide men more accolades, but I think these days it’s become the social norm that if you raise up a man you are somehow lowering a woman – and you cannot do that. Until something in society changes that is unlikely to change for the better.
So many men feel like they are a burden on all of society and everyone else, and most don’t even think it’s possible to rise above that. They trod along out of a sense of duty or obligation. They are told they are unneeded despite all evidence to the contrary all around them and in their pockets, built and serviced by men.
If you recognize that, perhaps you can overcome it.
You are not simply obligated to exist for others and you are not a burden. You are part of the backbone of society and it crumbles without you. Everything around you is largely built by quiet men who received no thanks for it, only expectation and a wage. Men universally have all infrastructure jobs, outdoor jobs, and pretty much universally the dangerous jobs that make society possible. During the pandemic less men performed outdoor labor, there were less deaths, suddenly the percentage of women harmed in the workplace raised and the media freaked out more women were getting hurt at work. They weren’t, but less men dying suddenly made everyone more concerned for the women.
To be a decent man is not an aspiration to be complimented it is the expectation. You were basically drafted into preserving society by being born with a penis. Just accept it. Carry the weight like the rest of us, but do not feel like a burden. You’re simply another soldier holding society together quietly. With no rewards or medals. You won’t get applause or a parade, but you’ll get the job done. Your absence will be noticed more than your presence, but the world basically stops if enough of us don’t show up. Take pride and value in that.
But don’t ever feel like a burden or let anyone tell you that you are. Fuck that. Trudge alone, or rise above, but if you sink as a man there are few people who will catch you. That’s just the way it is, shrug, and move on. To be a man is to accept responsibility, and no one notices until you don’t and things around you start to fuck up.
I get compliments everyday. I stand before the mirror and compliment myself on being a sexy motherfucker. A smooth silver fox. I just ignore my wife’s laughter in the background and bask in my own glory.
So I don’t know about you guys, but I’m doing fine!
do YOU compliment other men regularly? if not, there lies the answer
Not to sound immodest but I got in pretty good shape and I get compliments all the time. Mostly from other men…but still.
Men don’t compliment other men because they are afraid of being called gay and women don’t compliment men because they are worried the man will think they want sex and harass them.
So basically, men don’t receive complements because people are afraid of how the men will react.
Men are only ever rewarded for what they produce. Your value is measured only in sweat and stress. That’s all society cares about from working-class men.
I know that feeling it must be disappointing or frustrating. Men have been perceived wrongly throughout history resulting in them being overlooked or taken for granted.
The wrong social belief that men are so emotionally tough and invulnerable to hurt has made them less deserving or even undeserving in the eyes of others of hype, compliments and acknowledgements.
I think one must be his own validator , acknowledger and source of praise.
Some do. It’s boring just you and I that don’t. 🙂
It’s just the way it is. I know a lot of dudes who are clinging to the hope they felt from a compliment that was given to them years ago. In some cases, decades ago.
We just don’t get complimented a lot. Not much we can do about it.
Men are scarier to just give a compliment to than women as a 17 year old girl tbhb
Because men are not born with value like women are. You build value as you age and you are just starting. When you are 33 the quality and attractiveness of the woman who commits is the best complement you will get. The children she bears who will love you so much they pee a little when you come home will be your complement. The fact that she ignores her girls when they all get divorced and she decides to stay with you will be your complement. Set your goals well and work hard.
A girl told me she always thought I was funny on the last day of highschool, I still think about it.
I always want to compliment other men tbh. I see cool outfits, piercings, hair and want to tell them. Being a gay man though I worry they’ll think I am flirting with them, and put my safety at risk tbh.
I mean yeah we don’t get a lot of compliments but most compliments women receive is people just trying to fuck them.