TIFU by stealing a motorbike

Obligatory, didn’t happen today.

I was visiting my parents in my hometown after a long time, and I decided to head out in the evening to catch some air and wander around town, see what had changed, maybe run some errands for my mom while I am at it.

Thing about me is that I typically go about my daily routines on autopilot while my head is a million miles away. Like I’d suddenly come to myself in the middle of taking a shower and not remember getting in. Or I’d catch myself washing plates and realise that I’ve already finished dinner.

So I borrowed my dad’s bike to go into town. Most of the journey was a blur. I was operating on autopilot like I usually do, looking around town while my head was in the past, thinking of the last time I had been there.

Anyway, I did some shopping for my mom, stretched my legs a bit, and when I was ready to head back, I realised that I had forgotten to make note of where exactly I left my bike.

I retraced my steps back to the store and fortunately I spotted my bike quickly. Or rather, I thought I did. I turned the key in the ignition and the bike started. I noticed dimly that the seat cover looked unfamiliar and the bike’s handling felt different. I simply assumed that I had neglicted to notice these things on the way over since my head was in the clouds as it usually is. I mean, what other explanation could be there? After all I was able to unlock the bike with my key so it must be my bike.

About an hour later my mom called me to tell me that someone called my dad’s office saying that I took their bike. And I was like, “Oh, shit.”

I rushed downstairs and checked the number plate. Sure enough, not my bike.

I rushed back to the store, my face burning with embarassment. I got there to find two older gents waiting at the spot where I had taken the bike from. I got down and handed the bike back to them, apologizing profusely the whole time and getting a very well deserved earful. They relented when I showed them that the bike was unlockable with my key, and that it wasn’t a deliberate theft attempt, just a scatterbrained idiot who fucked up.

They said that they had initially panicked when they found the bike missing. They asked around and the store that I had visited checked their external cameras which showed me getting on the bike and driving off. The owner was about to call the cops but the other person found it strange that I had just casually gotten on the bike and driven off. This gave them hope that maybe the bike had been taken by mistake rather than stolen.

They looked around, found my abandoned bike and tracked the licence plate on the RTO website. It turned up my dad’s name. Fortunately my dad is well known around town. They called his office, the secretary in turn called my mom, who relayed it to me.

Apparently I had apologised sufficiently to mollify them, and since they knew my dad they let the incident slide. No harm, no foul.

So all in all everyone got a bit of a laugh out of it at my expense. My sister still hasn’t let me live it down.

TL;DR: Took someone else’s bike without realising. Realised my fuck up when they did some sleuthing and tracked it down to me.