So my best friend (19f) and me (20f) made plans to hang out this weekend. I was so excited to hang out with her, especially since it’s been a a few weeks since we hung out. 40 minutes before she texts me that she has to clean the house with her boyfriend, she’s clearly feels guilty especially but I feel like she could have told me this morning or yesterday. We both have weird work schedules so it can be hard to plan stuff , but I can’t help but feel sad/disappointed/a little mad. I get we all have stuff going on but it hurts when this happens especially because it isn’t the first time . I told her how I felt ,but maybe I should have been more eager to reschedule (as we have separate plans soon) but it is different. It’s hard to explain, because I feel like I’m being irrational.
Edit: there are other things going on/to do, we talked about it and I know she feels bad and we really are going to be fine.
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Backup of the post’s body: So my best friend (19f) and me (20f) made plans to hang out this weekend. I was so excited to hang out with her, especially since it’s been a a few weeks since we hung out. 40 minutes before she texts me that she has to clean the house with her boyfriend, she’s clearly feels guilty especially because this isn’t the first time. We both have weird work schedules so it can be hard to plan stuff , but I can’t help but feel sad/disappointed/a little mad. I get we all have stuff going on but it hurts when this happens especially because it isn’t the first time . I told her how I felt ,but maybe I should have been more eager to reschedule (as we have separate plans soon) but it is different. It’s hard to explain, because I feel like I’m being irrational.
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You’re allowed to feel disappointed and you’re allowed to tell her you’re disappointed.
Does she have an abusive controlling boyfriend?
Nah dude. Of course you’re allowed to be disappointed and annoyed.
I’d probably not let it ruin a friendship, but these things happen. Feel your feelings and ride it out.
I would be annoyed. I also feel like “cleaning the house” is a bs excuse.
Canceling plans to clean the house? That’s not urgent. Either she’s lying or her BF is controlling and demanded it.
Also to me “cleaning the house” sounds like an excuse, maybe “washing my hair” would have been to obvious. I don’t see where cleaning the house is so unforseenable that you have to cancel 40 min before the appointment- unless there would have been a broken pipe ..
Maybe she didn’t feel to go out for some reason but wasn’t confident to tell you. You’re in the right to feel upset and to tell her but try to ask what was the real reason for her cancellation and then decide if you want to re-schedule
STOP 🛑 chasing this friendship.
So do you honestly think she was CLEANING with her boyfriend?
Be honest with yourself now.
She wasn’t cleaning.
And she’s done it before. So she doesn’t value you or the friendship.
She doesn’t.
So here’s what you do. You let her go.
Stop chasing her. Do NOT text her.
Find a NEW friend.
She texts you?
Her: Want to get together on Saturday?
“Nope. You’ve bailed on me too many times, so no. I believe our friendship came to an end when you claimed you had to cancel
because you had to clean your house right before we were supposed to meet up. So no. I don’t want to get together because you’d just bail on me again. No thanks.”