I don’t think “i don’t care if my kid hates me, i just want them to succeed” is the best thing..

r/

cuz ur kid wants to feel understood by you….

and when you push them past their limits, or to paths they’re not happy with, because you want them to succeed,

what you’re really doing is giving them a ton of emotional issues and internal conflicts..

is that worth the potential success? to feel broken and isolated and misunderstood?

Comments

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  2. dominosoverph Avatar

    I agree and am going through the same rn

  3. ImaRiderButIDC Avatar

    This is not unpopular at all. It’s well known even off Reddit that it’s important for children to have a good relationship with their parents, and that you can’t force success on kids.

    I’m sorry if you’re going through something tho, best of luck my dude.

  4. C4se4 Avatar

    I don’t think that’s a very unpopular opinion, especially these days. I don’t know anyone in my social circle who still has that “grind everyday” mindset. It’s just not worth it

  5. FamiliarRadio9275 Avatar

    I think this is an unpopular opinion amongst authoritative parents, however I think the general population and the product of these parents makes this a popular opinion.

  6. ninkhorasagh Avatar

    I am so sorry for the lack of emotional support from your parents. There shouldn’t be hate in your house, home is supposed to be a safe place, respite for you from the world.

  7. El_Zapp Avatar

    I’m sorry OP. This is in no way what a kid needs and also doesn’t lead to success, usually quite the opposite.

    Unfortunately especially conservatives are stuck with ideals that are potentially hundreds of years old and in the meantime proven to be pretty harmful to children.

    And I don’t agree that this is a “popular opinion”. Republicans are gaining a lot of strength and abusing children is one of the core values they are pushing.

  8. Pinkeu_hearteu Avatar

    What parents fail to understand is that they never succeeded in teaching their child things like emotion regulation, empathy, decision making skills, independence, communication, creativity, self expression. I mean the list goes on

  9. kvakerok_v2 Avatar

    Your kid also wants as much sugar and chocolate as they can humanly stuff in their mouth. To watch shows or play videogames as much as they can. 

    My point is, your kids have no fucking clue how world works. And it’s your job to teach them, not coddle them. Teach them discipline and patience.

    > when you push them past their limits

    WTF? They’re a child. EVERYTHING is past their limits. They’ve never done a single pull-up until they’ve done the first one. They’ve never made a single step until they make it. 

    > feel broken and isolated

    They feel broken and isolated because you’ve been enabling the worst possible character qualities in them for years

    Instead of a screen they need to interact with other kids on the street/playground, practicing their communication, conflict resolution, teamwork in games, where the stakes are low. 

    Instead of getting everything immediately they need to learn patience and discipline, so that they become a person that other people would want to interact with.

    Your kids feel broken because you broke them by doing the exact same things you advocate for.

  10. gamesquid Avatar

    Yeah seems pretty unlikely they will succeed if they hate you. Be better working together towards them succeeding.