I am 31, married. Wife (30) wants a kid in the next couple years. But I haven’t had that biological switch or moment making me want a child…. Yet. I figured as I got older I would want kids, and not something I’m opposed to. But I still am not currently desiring it. I know people say “oh no one is ever ready” for a kid.
Anyways as the title states. How’d you know you wanted to start a family?
Thanks!
When did you know you were ready to, or wanted to have a child?
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Since you shitlords like to delete your posts, here’s an original copy of /u/edmerks666’s post (if available):
I am 31, married. Wife (30) wants a kid in the next couple years. But I haven’t had that biological switch or moment making me want a child…. Yet. I figured as I got older I would want kids, and not something I’m opposed to. But I still am not currently desiring it. I know people say “oh no one is ever ready” for a kid.
Anyways as the title states. How’d you know you wanted to start a family?
Thanks!
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I reversed a vasectomy at 32. Never have a kid as a favor to someone else.
Dude you aren’t supposed to think about this.. just do it. You will get ready as you go.
For us, it happens gradually but one Christmas when it was just my wife and I, we both felt strongly that there was something missing. We both had always seen ourselves as raising children but we took that as a prompting that it was time. We were relatively poor at the time as I was in grad school and we were on one smaller income but we knew it was the right time for us
When I met my wife. She was a single mom, so it was a package deal.
When we were of the opinion we could afford one
I still dont know for sure and my oldest of 4 is 21. There is no magic or certianty. I dont even know if i am good at it. You jump in when you dare. Or not. You are never ready.
When I found out, I was pregnant at 34 years old.
When my ex got pregnant.
But I always wanted them, or thought I did. Having them with her was certainly a mistake.
Wasn’t fussed but my wife was, didn’t really connect with it until our child was actually born and then all of a sudden you would happily set the world on fire if it meant they were safe.
+10000 for you’re never ready.
Keep in mind that right now you’re trying to imagine a little person you’ve never met, so it’s hard to be excited. It’s easy to think of all the barriers.
True story. I disappointed my wife when she told me she was pregnant, because my mind started racing with all the things I’d have to figure out. Here I am 7 years later and I wish I could tell my former self to not worry about it and just get ready for the most amazing, magical time of my life.
ETA- don’t wait too long, either. You’re going to want to have as much life with them as possible.
Wife started talking about it a bit more when we were 31 ish. For the first time it felt more like yeah maybe I am ready for that. Got a bit of baby fever too.
I was 34 when the switch flipped and it actually flipped while dating my now husband.
Before him I was in a relationship of 13 years, even married and it felt the same way as you described – i hadn‘t had the desire to have kids, but it was something we have to have because of age, etc.
After meeting my now husband i really felt the desire to start a family.
Honestly… I (67M) was a few solid weeks into our (75F wife) pregnancy before I genuinely got into the game with good feelings. Forty years and 2 kids later I continue to be amazed, thrilled and blown away how great this family is.
Right around 8 or so
For me personally, I was always 50/50 on the idea. That changed pretty recently after spending significant time with my newborn nephew, now I’d definitely say I want children.
For a lot of guys, I think it doesn’t really “click” until they have their own though.
60M, still waiting…
I raised my sister after my dad died, and I do not want kids. But up until a few months ago, I had never known a woman who made me want to become a better man, but here we are, with a broken heart and a fire in my soul I had never had. I still don’t want kids, what I’m saying is, sometimes things need to happen for you to change, there isn’t a decision.
My brother and sister in law were also against having children, but after a change in contraceptive method, she ended up pregnant, and he could not be a better or happier father.
When my girlfriend and I realized that the people we were with were ones we could trust to an ultimate degree. That we could not imagine having children with anyone else and that we would make an incredible set of parents, even if things didn’t work out in the end between the two of us. We would still make it work for our kid.
My wife and I always talked about it while we were dating and engaged, and knew we wanted kids “one day”. I’d still buy plan B whenever we had an accident, but then about a year after we got married, it just kinda clicked that we were both ready for the next step. We were happy where we were, we had and still do have an exceptionally strong and happy marriage, but it felt like something was missing in our lives.
One kid later, and it’s not missing anymore. She’s perfect.
I knew I wanted to be a Dad since I knew what Dads were.
Not to be negative, but you do know you have a time limit, right? I mean you’ve already crossed a median where it starts to get difficult but you’re only a few more years before you cross an even worse one. Geriatric High Risk Pregnancies start at 35 even without other complications. I’m kind of surprised this doesn’t seem to be more common knowledge.
I think I was tripping mushrooms on a camping trip. I think I was like 16 or 17 years old.
Just thought about a lot of stuff and realized I’m gonna be a dad one day. I already wanted to be one but the mushrooms made me realize fatherhood was an inevitability in my life.
Fatherhood happened. Wasn’t planned but it was very much welcome. Just live life and love freely lol.
I’m 24, and I don’t even feel ready to date…
So I definitely am not ready or mature enough to have kids. But that’s something I’d probably want to try later.
Between the first and second date 🤣🤣🤣
I (m) have wanted kids since I was a teenager. I have four kids and seven grandkids. It’s amazing!
When o-girl says….I got something to tell ya….🤣🤣🤣
At least since my early 20s, I knew I wanted a family – ideally, 3 or 4 kids, maybe more.
Well, I’m in my 30s now. Turns out you can’t have kids with your hand, so… I’m SOL I guess.