AITA for being possessive over my food?

r/

So, I’m going to get straight to the point.

Today, I brought wings and fries. I didn’t finish it all so I put it in the fridge so I could have it later.

Few hours later, I go into the fridge and it was all gone. Mind you, there was 4 wings and a whole container of fries in there.

It was just me, my mom’s boyfriend (Sam) and his son so, I asked Sam where my food went and he said he gave it to his son.

Obviously, I was upset because 1. You didn’t even ask and 2. You gave all of it to him, knowing he wouldn’t finish it so now half of the food I paid for is sitting in the trash.

I told him to stop just feeding my food to his son without asking, which he does ALL the time. He’ll take my food from the fridge, and just give it to his son. He never, ever asks.

Like I don’t mind sharing but I feel like taking my things without asking isn’t nice.

He told me I’m being possessive over food and that it’s not that deep. Sam also said I’m 16 refusing to share with an 8 year old as if I’m a toddler.

So, AITA?

Comments

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    So, I’m going to get straight to the point.

    Today, I brought wings and fries. I didn’t finish it all so I put it in the fridge so I could have it later.

    Few hours later, I go into the fridge and it was all gone. Mind you, there was 4 wings and a whole container of fries in there.

    It was just me, my mom’s boyfriend (Sam) and his son so, I asked Sam where my food went and he said he gave it to his son.

    Obviously, I was upset because 1. You didn’t even ask and 2. You gave all of it to him, knowing he wouldn’t finish it so now half of the food I paid for is sitting in the trash.

    I told him to stop just feeding my food to his son without asking, which he does ALL the time. He’ll take my food from the fridge, and just give it to his son. He never, ever asks.

    Like I don’t mind sharing but I feel like taking my things without asking isn’t nice.

    He told me I’m being possessive over food and that it’s not that deep. Sam also said I’m 16 refusing to share with an 8 year old as if I’m a toddler.

    So, AITA?

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    > I wanted to know if I’m the asshole as it feels like I’m being selfish by not sharing with Sam’s son.

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  3. lihzee Avatar

    NTA. Why can’t Sam provide food for his son without the aid of a 16 year old?

  4. PancakeBuny Avatar

    NTA if he can tell you not to be possessive about your food, why is any feeding the kid his food? He’s just using your leftovers as an easy lazy meal because he doesn’t wanna have to go through the hassle of making one himself.

  5. ScarletNotThatOne Avatar

    NTA. It’s not your job to feed Sam’s son. If you get food for yourself, you have a right to eat it, not have it taken away. It’s not that deep.

    He’s criticizing you for being possessive but there’s nothing wrong with being possessive about your own stuff. He’s the one in the wrong for taking your stuff. Let him come up with his own food for his son.

  6. gabbythecat68 Avatar

    NTA but fries that have been in the refrigerator, honestly?

  7. rosythorn_ Avatar

    NTA. Might be time to invest in a mini fridge for your room

  8. Short_Background_669 Avatar

    NTA. This freeloader should be providing for his own kid. He is calling you possessive to deflect his own actions. Does he have any stuff around the house that you can casually tip away at using? When he complains say Sam why are you so possessive of your stuff.

  9. Allaboutbird Avatar

    Of course you’re NTA. Refusing to share food you paid for isn’t “toddler” behavior. Toddlers never pay for their own food. They don’t even have jobs.

  10. Dittoheadforever Avatar

    You’re NTA. 

    >Sam also said I’m 16 refusing to share with an 8 year old as if I’m a toddler.

    And Sam is much older than you and yet he is refusing to provide food for his own child, choosing instead to take food from a teenager. 

  11. Dotcomula Avatar

    NTA. I would duct tape my leftovers after that, unless the bf recognizes that he should share from his wallet and not just yours.

  12. SnooJokes6414 Avatar

    No, NTA

    Sam is the toddler if you didn’t notice, not his son.

  13. West_House_2085 Avatar

    Time for a mini fridge!

    NTA

  14. New-Transition-5179 Avatar

    NTA, you bought the food, it’s your food to decide what to do with. If he wants to be able to decide he should pay for it.

  15. Internal-Unicorn1629 Avatar

    Nta

    Get a mini fridge for your room to keep your food in.

  16. Vegetable-Fix-4702 Avatar

    He stole your food. He needs to buy food for his own son. WTH?!

  17. AcephalicDude Avatar

    NTA

    I wouldn’t even describe this as being “possessive” because it’s not like you are completely unwilling to share food. You just expect some common courtesy. Not only is Sam not extending that common courtesy to you, he’s also using his own son as an excuse not to. Sam sucks.

  18. Zausted Avatar

    No way, NTA at all. He’s overstepping some pretty reasonable boundaries. He’s completely wrong.

  19. DevVenavis Avatar

    I’m at the point where getting a response of ‘it’s not that deep’ is enough to make me cut someone out of my life forever. It’s dismissive assholery that serves only to DARVO, and is proof that whoever said it knew they were wrong and doesn’t care.

  20. National_Panda700 Avatar

    The only question is, does he supply you food? If it’s a two-way street, I could see it if he never brings you anything. It’s bad behavior. Not to mention that you’re a kid in a blended family…he should be on his best behavior to not upset you.

  21. Responsible_Lawyer78 Avatar

    NTA. Your mom’s boyfriend sounds like a cheap mooch. It’s not your responsibility to feed his son.

  22. PristineEvidence9893 Avatar

    It would be one thing if he brought you food and whatnot as often as he gave it away. NTA little buddy

  23. No-Function223 Avatar

    Nta but this is something your mother needs to handle. 

  24. Historical_Wing3120 Avatar

    NTA. If it’s not a big deal, tell him that he should go get his own wings and fries.

  25. SmartEpicness Avatar

    NTA

    You paid for the food. It’s your choice who gets it.

    Sam is a freeloader.

  26. mavenmim Avatar

    NTA. Your food, your choice whether to share it. But probably better not to store it in the fridge as he will continue to do this unless your mom says something to change his mind.

  27. EvilSockLady Avatar

    “Joey doesn’t share food!”

    Yeah NTA. Write your name on your stuff at the least. That probably won’t stop this but it will at least be clear as day to Sam that he’s stealing another kid’s food.

    I like the idea of your having your own mini fridge.

  28. Childless_Catlady42 Avatar

    Why is your mother letting her boyfriend steal food from her child?

    Have you asked her why she is allowing this?

    You are a child. You are her child. She is responsible for taking care of you first. Her boyfriend has a child. He is responsible for taking care of his child. She needs to step up and protect you, her child.

  29. Technical-Paper427 Avatar

    I am possessive about food THAT I BOUGHT indeed!!
    So, pay up bud, so I can replace this.

    What does your mom say about that? Is she sticking up for you?

    NTA

    Food or snacks that my husband and I buy is for the household. Food or snacks that one of our kids buy with their own money (that they get from us ofcourse, they only have allowance, no job yet)…. We sometimes buy from them lol if we want a snack but see that someone bought a tasty snack. We ask, and if it’s okay we pay for it or replace it.

  30. Moist_Drippings Avatar

    It isn’t nice, it’s weird at the very least and like he’s trying to stake some kind of possessive claim over the house.

    Talk to your mother about how being treated this way makes you feel insecure in your own home. (Insecure meaning literally not secure – because you shouldn’t have to be guarding food you bought for yourself like this.)

  31. FortuneWhereThoutBe Avatar

    NTA

    Give him a bill for the cost of the lost food. he can pay for the theft

  32. BlackberryMelodic567 Avatar

    Not the asshole, at all. He needs to buy the food to feed his son, not you

  33. AvocadoJazzlike3670 Avatar

    NTA he’s a dad who takes from a 16 yr old to feed his son. He’s an ahole and horrible father. Take it up with your mother and lock your food down. Feeding his kid is his responsibility not yours.

  34. MinkaB1993 Avatar

    He sounds like a lazy parent. Is it hard for him to just make a sandwich for his kid?

    It seems like you’d be okay with sharing if he’d ask. As an adult, he should possess the skills and respect to be able to do that. NTA.

  35. Electrical_Pie7980 Avatar

    NTA it’s not YOUR job to feed HIS child. Sounds like some lazy, freeloader ass shit.

  36. sockmaster420 Avatar

    Time to start taking his food and giving it away

  37. Fit-Engineering-2789 Avatar

    NTA. Your leftovers belonged to you. You are not being unreasonable to ask him to ask you first. It really sucks when you expect to have something easy to eat and someone else ate it before you got to it. Adults doing this to someone who is underage just because they are an adult and you are not is ridiculous. This isn’t about not sharing. This is about someone taking your things without asking.

  38. InspiredInaction Avatar

    NTA! You are not being possessive over food, you are asking for people to show common decency and use their, as I used to refer to them with my kids, “good words“ and ask for what they want from you. That’s called being a decent fucking human being.

    DFHB Club application has been rejected for this so-called grown man

  39. petite_loup Avatar

    NTA it’s not called sharing when they don’t ask, it’s called stealing.

  40. GroundbreakingRip970 Avatar

    NTA.

    You could try writing Do Not Eat on your containers. In our house, if your name is on it, no one is supposed to eat any of it without asking. If no name is on it, it’s up for grabs. You could also ask your step dad if he wants to pay for something for Sam when you are picking up something to bring home.

    Your step dad is being a jerk about this and I’m sorry he is unreasonable

  41. insipiddeity Avatar

    NTA. He should feed his own son with his own money if “its not really a big deal”. Sounds like you’ll need a mini fridge for your own room now.

  42. Grammie1439 Avatar

    I would get a dorm fridge for my room.

  43. Cav-2021 Avatar

    what does your mother say when you tell about him stealing your food

  44. Mccampb Avatar

    NTA How embarrassing for him and sad for his son that he takes care and consideration around is own food but just feeds his kid whatever is already available. Like a pet.

    If you stop brining any food into the house, does he feed his kid out of his own food? Do what you can when you can to take control back here. Look up solutions for people whose roommates steal their food. There are a ton of products out there that fit into the fridge as well as a mini fridge.

    Try not to get mad. Just quietly do what you need to do for yourself and any fallout should be dealt with by your mom.