I’m at a loss, y’all. My wife and I have been together four years, married for a year and a half. In that time she has become increasingly unreliable financially, psychologically, and emotionally.
She’s frequently verbally abusive, emotionally manipulative, a self-admitted pathological liar. She’s not been paying rent or bills on time or in full for years now, causing our (once kinda substantial) savings to dwindle down to about $5k. I’m one part ATM, one part vending machine, one part emotional support dog (but without the treats)
I need to end this, and I very much feel like someone needing to leave an abusive spouse, suddenly and in a hurry, to avoid the massive emotional blowup that I know will follow. i don’t need to know about the legal process of divorce (time for that later), but rather more practical advice on how to remove myself from this situation.
We moved to Chicago last year, so i dont have many friends or family here yet. We’re on a pretty new lease. this Week i’m hunting for a second job to try and secure our (my) finances. To Leave is gonna be a big expense, and it’s doubly difficult if I’m still financially supporting her. Triply so cause our new apartment is a higher rent/bills than our last place.
Has anyone found themselves in a similar situation? How’d you manage to extricate yourself and what problems can I anticipate?
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Since you shitlords like to delete your posts, here’s an original copy of /u/Sea-Season-7055’s post (if available):
I’m at a loss, y’all. My wife and I have been together four years, married for a year and a half. In that time she has become increasingly unreliable financially, psychologically, and emotionally.
She’s frequently verbally abusive, emotionally manipulative, a self-admitted pathological liar. She’s not been paying rent or bills on time or in full for years now, causing our (once kinda substantial) savings to dwindle down to about $5k. I’m one part ATM, one part vending machine, one part emotional support dog (but without the treats)
I need to end this, and I very much feel like someone needing to leave an abusive spouse, suddenly and in a hurry, to avoid the massive emotional blowup that I know will follow. i don’t need to know about the legal process of divorce (time for that later), but rather more practical advice on how to remove myself from this situation.
We moved to Chicago last year, so i dont have many friends or family here yet. We’re on a pretty new lease. this Week i’m hunting for a second job to try and secure our (my) finances. To Leave is gonna be a big expense, and it’s doubly difficult if I’m still financially supporting her. Triply so cause our new apartment is a higher rent/bills than our last place.
Has anyone found themselves in a similar situation? How’d you manage to extricate yourself and what problems can I anticipate?
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Try calling the national abuse hotline or looking for local resources.
Contact a lawyer, cover your ass as much as possible, record her abuse.
If by some chance you are a truck driver and you have a CDL – PM me, I can put you in a truck with a sleeper tonight parked in Blue Island, there’s a shower and a Walmart nearby. I can get you paid on Friday.
Why not just get in the car and drive back to where you were living before and stay with some friends or family til you get back on your feet?
Is she on the lease? If she’s not just kick her out
If she is then it’s a little trickier. I’d probably get a restraining order against her and file an eviction notice with your landlord. Both of these take time but it’s a start I guess
Call the hotline. Text Begin to 88788. They will have tips and ideas and phone numbers – you’ll be glad you did.
If you’re both on the lease, you can just leave and she will be responsible
No kids? She got a job?
Sounds like my ex. Run!