I shifted my schedule back and forth within the week so we could be together full days on my off days. I would call my partner at work. I would plan huge amounts of dates in the morning and aim for intimacy when I came home.
One part of nights that I really liked is that it’s quiet. There’s generally downtime.
USE DOWNTIME FOR YOU AND YOUR PARTNER INDIRECTLY!!!
Plan a date, write a letter, send a voice message(not text). You aren’t around as often physically so you need to be there even more emotionally. If you don’t do this you will be forsaking your relationship and sending it to the graveyard.
I would also buy flowers every 2-3 weeks and put them in a place she would see them every day. Generally, this and your letters are a great thing to do in pair. She’ll have a letter of your love and emotion to remind her you are here emotionally and a visual reminder in the flowers. Stay in her mind.
On days she is lonely and cant talk to you as she falls asleep those voice messages can help her feel close to you.
I worked night shift for over 5 years and this was before we had all the options we have now, like online chat, online gaming, etc.
And the key is I NEVER really made a relationship work. Friendships, I had to have them with people that worked the same shift, which wasn’t something I wanted. Relationships. I tried a couple of times, but being awake during the day for a date when you were used to sleeping, you felt like a zombie.
I’ll never go back to night shift because I know what kind of lifestyle change it involved, and there is no way someone would compensate me the levels that I feel I should be compensated for upending my lifestyle. After 5 years, it took me almost as long to get my sleep cycle back to “normal”. I hope you’re asking for a good salary to make up for such a horrible social life that it entails. Granted, you have online communities, online gaming, and other resources. Imagine not having most of those things, and living in a city that was essentially shut down after midnight or 2 am around what would be your “afternoon”.
My parents both happened to be night-shifters. From what I’ve seen, they both made the effort to ensure that their time off lined up with eachother, made sure to attend any matinee events like baseball games and early morning movies, and their “diners” were actually going out to a nice breakfast spot.
However in the perspective of raising kids, it was living hell. For perspective, just imagine having to wake up at 3:00 pm every day to sit in the glaring hot sun and traffic to pick up your noisy kids each weekday and try to go to sleep again for 2-3 hours after.
And the toll it takes on any children/significant people who aren’t night shifters. Most interactions you have with others will be when you are dead tired if you’re interacting in the daytime. For me and my siblings as kids, we went wild and unsupervised (in hindsight I can’t believe I didn’t hurt myself in a major way).
So the answer really depends on the family/relationship dynamics you’re aiming for. Just be sure to live on a schedule and get 6+ of uninterrupted sleep.
Not me, but my mom met my stepdad while she worked 3rd shift. I’m not sure what he did for work, but he seemed like a daytime guy when I first met him.
Mostly, they would just find times when they were both free, and tried to plan stuff for those times.
I lucked out because of our schedules. I work Sunday nights-Thursday nights,her during the day Monday through Friday. I just end up sleeping while she’s at work ,waking to spend time with her once she’s off work until she goes to bed which in turn gives me a little chance to sleep before I head in to work myself.
Slept while she was at work on my work days, and flipped my sleeping schedule to match hers on my days off. Flipping sleeping cycles isn’t that entirely difficult if you take a tactical nap at the right time.
I would sleep during the day while my SO was at work and work while my SO was asleep at night. Although I di also have relationships in the past where my SO also worked nights.
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Made a day off together in our schedules.
I shifted my schedule back and forth within the week so we could be together full days on my off days. I would call my partner at work. I would plan huge amounts of dates in the morning and aim for intimacy when I came home.
One part of nights that I really liked is that it’s quiet. There’s generally downtime.
USE DOWNTIME FOR YOU AND YOUR PARTNER INDIRECTLY!!!
Plan a date, write a letter, send a voice message(not text). You aren’t around as often physically so you need to be there even more emotionally. If you don’t do this you will be forsaking your relationship and sending it to the graveyard.
I would also buy flowers every 2-3 weeks and put them in a place she would see them every day. Generally, this and your letters are a great thing to do in pair. She’ll have a letter of your love and emotion to remind her you are here emotionally and a visual reminder in the flowers. Stay in her mind.
On days she is lonely and cant talk to you as she falls asleep those voice messages can help her feel close to you.
Best of luck to you. Nights is hard as fuck man.
I worked night shift for over 5 years and this was before we had all the options we have now, like online chat, online gaming, etc.
And the key is I NEVER really made a relationship work. Friendships, I had to have them with people that worked the same shift, which wasn’t something I wanted. Relationships. I tried a couple of times, but being awake during the day for a date when you were used to sleeping, you felt like a zombie.
I’ll never go back to night shift because I know what kind of lifestyle change it involved, and there is no way someone would compensate me the levels that I feel I should be compensated for upending my lifestyle. After 5 years, it took me almost as long to get my sleep cycle back to “normal”. I hope you’re asking for a good salary to make up for such a horrible social life that it entails. Granted, you have online communities, online gaming, and other resources. Imagine not having most of those things, and living in a city that was essentially shut down after midnight or 2 am around what would be your “afternoon”.
I worked 9pm-5am for a couple years while my girlfriend was a full time student. We just had dates on the weekend.
Been together 17 years now. Married 10
My parents both happened to be night-shifters. From what I’ve seen, they both made the effort to ensure that their time off lined up with eachother, made sure to attend any matinee events like baseball games and early morning movies, and their “diners” were actually going out to a nice breakfast spot.
However in the perspective of raising kids, it was living hell. For perspective, just imagine having to wake up at 3:00 pm every day to sit in the glaring hot sun and traffic to pick up your noisy kids each weekday and try to go to sleep again for 2-3 hours after.
And the toll it takes on any children/significant people who aren’t night shifters. Most interactions you have with others will be when you are dead tired if you’re interacting in the daytime. For me and my siblings as kids, we went wild and unsupervised (in hindsight I can’t believe I didn’t hurt myself in a major way).
So the answer really depends on the family/relationship dynamics you’re aiming for. Just be sure to live on a schedule and get 6+ of uninterrupted sleep.
I work rotating shifts off days in middle of week with wife having weekends off, how do we make it work? We make an effort to do stuff for each other.
Right now, my partner and I both work nights so it works.
My partner change shift every 2 days. 6 days work, 4 days of. We make it work.
Not me, but my mom met my stepdad while she worked 3rd shift. I’m not sure what he did for work, but he seemed like a daytime guy when I first met him.
Mostly, they would just find times when they were both free, and tried to plan stuff for those times.
I lucked out because of our schedules. I work Sunday nights-Thursday nights,her during the day Monday through Friday. I just end up sleeping while she’s at work ,waking to spend time with her once she’s off work until she goes to bed which in turn gives me a little chance to sleep before I head in to work myself.
Relationship? What’s that?
Slept while she was at work on my work days, and flipped my sleeping schedule to match hers on my days off. Flipping sleeping cycles isn’t that entirely difficult if you take a tactical nap at the right time.
I would sleep during the day while my SO was at work and work while my SO was asleep at night. Although I di also have relationships in the past where my SO also worked nights.