when did you know your relationship was over?

r/

main question in title.
how did you act towards your partner? how did thdy sct towards you?
what did you do when you realized?

Comments

  1. soberultra Avatar

    It felt like I was more lonely in the relationship than I ever was being single. He’d be right next to me but always glued to his phone, barely present, barely talking. I started feeling like a roommate instead of a partner. I’d try to start conversations but it felt like one-sided every time. Eventually, I stopped trying. That’s when I realized I was already doing it all alone.

  2. draoikat Avatar

    With my ex-husband… when it was a just a friendship. I believe an underlying close friendship is absolutely essential to a healthy and happy and fulfilling relationship, but romantic and sexual connection are necessary too. It’s very lonely when you’re not sexually desired and don’t feel any sappy feelings anymore.

    With my ex-girlfriend… when there was no real friendship underneath the attraction parts and no mutual trust and we were both lying about stuff to each other, and definitely when it had become emotionally abusive. And I also knew we wanted different things in the future, so what was the point.

  3. Ebony_Princess1 Avatar

    When he was “working late” and his paycheck did match the amount of hours he was putting in. He became very short then verbally abusive! I recommend counseling and he decided every time. So I told him I don’t deserve this and my son won’t watch a man treat his mother this way!

  4. Curious_Document_956 Avatar

    Which relationship, any or most recent?

  5. nermega Avatar

    I knew it was over when I felt more exhausted than happy around him. I started keeping things to myself, didn’t even bother arguing anymore. He got cold, like he was already halfway out. Once I realized I was the only one still trying, I stopped too. Just quietly let go.

  6. moonydark Avatar

    When I told him I was unhappy in our relationship and he broke down and it ended up with me comforting him. Then the next day he made a “joke” about how me expressing my unhappiness ruined his day off when I’d been off sick from work because the thought of trying to broach the subject in the first place was making me physically ill.

  7. -aquapixie- Avatar

    When he ghosted me for a month and refused to reply to any of my messages.

    And then I found him on Bumble (created a fake account because I had a gut intuition). So I ended it.

    And then I found out he had been cheating on me the entire 4 years.

    Ssssooooooo had he not ghosted (out of being so salty I wasn’t supporting his band and focusing on myself instead), he’d still be getting laid and still cheating.

  8. trtdlrwlma Avatar

    I was afraid of him and couldn’t even look at him. My body fully rejected him.

  9. juanlo02 Avatar

    he told me that he would like to have a wife a bit different than me, those words killed me

  10. SailorLuna41518181 Avatar

    Like another commenter said, we were best friends, but the sexual and romantic chemistry had been severely off for years, despite the constant and diverse ways I’ve tried to support him making the necessary changes to save our couple. Despite the fact that he loved me truly and deeply, we were on different planes of understanding when it comes to intimacy in a marriage. I warned and emphasized many times of the effects the negligence was having on my mental health and my feelings towards him. I gave him one last chance, he knew and understood it was the last chance, and he botched it. Something finally definitively broke inside me, and I felt the soul of the part of me that loved him expire into the void. I asked for a divorce a couple of weeks later. Despite him having started to make efforts in those two weeks, despite him being a genuinely good person and friend, despite our love having literally been “iconic” in all our friends and family’s eyes. The price to pay to stay was my own soul, I couldn’t do that to myself anymore.

  11. DiviFail Avatar

    When he said “they only held hands” and that I was overreacting to the fact that he, my boyfriend, had spent the night with another woman. He thought I should be grateful he didn’t bang her before he broke up with me because “nothing happened”. I REALLY knew it was over when I slammed the door in his face some 2 week later, as he tried to come crawling back.

  12. curly-hair07 Avatar

    I felt like they didn’t like me. They were getting extra snappy and want asking to see me.

  13. blobfishchitown Avatar

    When I started to need time away from him to find peace.

  14. kebabbles92 Avatar

    I remember my boyfriend’s friend asked me whether I was looking forward to my boyfriend proposing. When I went quiet she asked whether I would say yes if he asked. I said I don’t know and we both sat there and realised it was over.

  15. Knower-of-all-things Avatar

    When it was a relief that he went away for a week on business. Since then I’ve realised our 3yo has better emotional intelligence than his dad 🙈

  16. Dr__Pheonx Avatar

    Dead bedroom.

  17. Lara_0925 Avatar

    When every day it felt like they were looking for any opportunity to pick a fight, and their end goal was to get a gotcha instead of resolving anything.

    I send a message without an emoji? “Are you threatening me?”. I say a word in English in my sentence (not their native language)? “Are you insulting my English abilities?”. I’m celebrating with my teammates after a sports championship victory? “How can you be so happy when I’m not there?”.

  18. Technical_Dirt_6126 Avatar

    When sorting out become too stressful and everything piled up to the extent I couldn’t take anymore. Constant silent treatment, I was never prioritised. Everything else was more important than my well-being n feelings.

  19. 777npc Avatar

    When talking about plans always ended w him saying “if we’re still together then”