Hello im a teen asian male and Ive only had one relationship my whole life. And i dont think ive met a girl thats like actually interested in me. Idk what to do. I think i have a pretty decent face maybe a bit short but thats it. Im also a pretty good listener and im decent at making conversation. I rly dont know what to do.
How do you find a girl into you?
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Hello im a teen asian male and Ive inly had one relationship my whole life. And i dont think ive met a girl thats like actually interested in me. Idk what to do. I think i have a pretty decent face maybe a bit short but thats it. Im also a pretty good listener and im decent at making conversation. I rly dont know what to do.
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“Ive only had one relationship my whole life.”
Welp…Lil’ bro…You’re already ahead of a lot of us, already.
Okay well the asian part is basically…irrelevant. But let’s put that aside.
Lad, you’ve got to understand that you’re so young that you can’t even fathom how young you are. It’s like asking how you could ever be LeBron James even though you can barely dribble a basketball.
Don’t focus on finding a girl. Focus on developing yourself. Spend time with girls. Socialize with girls as much as possible. You need to gain experience – both life experience and experience interacting with people. If a girlfriend comes along great, if not, you keep working on yourself playa. I promise you if you look at it like that, things are going to happen for you.
Keep doing things that develop you as a person, figure out what you’re interested in and what you offer – go from there.
Appearance matters mainly only when it comes to taking care of yourself. Height is pointless to worry about as you can’t change it and people who care are not going to be a good fit anyway, and phrenology is a great way to kill your confidence and stay alone.
In terms of long term relationships – make friends with women who share your values and interests. Best case you find a particularly compatible person to date, worst case you have a cool new friend. Just be normal about it and you’ll be fine OP!
Dude, my first move was ‘accidentally’ sitting next to her in class… then not talking for 45 mins. Just smile, say ‘hey’ about literally anything—her pencil, the weather. So awkwardness!
In order for someone to be interested in you, you have to be interesting.
Rhetorical question: can you name 5 things in 10 seconds that you could have a passionate conversation about? Could be hobbies, interests, random topics, doesn’t matter too much as long as it’s not so niche that no one can relate to it. As long as you have things to talk about, the conversation won’t die out.
If you can’t name 5 things, I hate to say it, but you need to develop you identity a bit before worrying about dating. “Finding your identity” can be tricky but really what I mean is things like are you a gamer, sports, cooking, etc. When people think of you what do they think of?
Date all of them until you find the one.
As an Asian guy, I’ve been there as well when I was a teenager but that’s also a whole other area to discuss.
It’s easier said than done but you got to stop thinking that the relationship or the girl is something you got to obtain. Don’t think of the girl as some sort of prize, that’s the path of failure. Find something you’re passionate about, interact with as many people as possible (I’m not talking just your peers or people your age), go through the growing pains of finding out what clothes look good on you, obtain new experiences via volunteering, going to gigs, or travelling in the future when you get older and can afford it.
Short answer: you’re young. Chill out and work on yourself. Long answer: literally chill tf out. Are you trying to get married right now?? No. You have your whole life ahead of you. In a couple of years you’ll be an entirely different person. There is literally no reason to rush. Just be patient, work on actual life goals (that don’t involve women) and let it all unfold naturally. Don’t force it, don’t think about it too much. Just be ready when the time comes. You’ll be fine. Rushing into your first couple of heartbreaks is not the move. I promise.
A teen male with one relationship already? Dude, you’re ahead of 90% of men in this world.
Teen male with 1 r/ship…you’re way ahead than most ppl here man
Join a club at your school. Also watch the show Bottom Tier Character Tomokazi and see how well he does it 😉
Don’t focus too much on romance my guy, focus on yourself first and foremost. Make yourself someone that people appreciate and desire to have around and eventually, as long as you respect women(in the same way you respect the men around you), you spend some time working on your aesthetics and social skills(like any other skill, takes active effort!) you’ll be MILES ahead of the average mfer your age.
For me, I’ve always been “interesting” once I’ve got the other individual to talk to me, but I realized that if I looked like an unkempt oaf that does the bare minimum, people had no reason to give a fuck about why I even existed.
Figure out the good things about yourself that make you who you are, work on them and invest your energy into them, be it habits, virtues and/or hobbies. Figure out the stuff about you that you recognize as unsavoury and little by little, work on minimizing that stuff, that’s in essence how we grow as human beings.
Now that this is all said and done, it won’t guarantee you romance by a long shot, but you know what? You’ll be happier for it, because instead of wasting your time and energy chasing individuals that may or may not want you, you did it all for yourself, and if there’s no one else to appreciate it, there’s at least yourself.
Stop trying to find a girl and start trying to have fun. When you do that you’ll end up finding one
You keep putting yourself out there. Eventually you will find someone you connect with
build a nest first, then look for a girl
meaning, have a good life, be healthy in mind and body, have friends hobbies and a home you can invite people over to.
maybe you will meet someone along the way, if so great if not having the above things will make you much more attractive
are we the same person lol?
Do things you like to do.
You say you have a “pretty decent face” and you’re a “good listener” and “good at conversation”. That’s bare minimum stuff.
You’ve mentioned nothing about what a girl would find interesting in you to actually be interested. Get some hobbies, and things you’re passionate about. You’re young and have very little experience or reach to meet a lot of people. So for now, make friends and grow your personal network. Gain knowledge. Invest in yourself.
Then just chill out. Consider getting out of your comfort zone the closer you get to college, by traveling or going to school abroad.
I’ve found girls are easy to find. The difficult part is finding a partner. My advice would be to not try and find a girl. Find a life you want to live, and a partner will come along.
Joining a group based around a hobby you like is a great way to find a partner. I know plenty of people who met partners that way.
Go to college/university. It is an expensive way to meet someone, but at no other time in your life will you be able to meet so many intelligent, attractive, and hardworking people your age. There will be a lot of people who don’t fit that description, but you’ll have to soft through that. College is expensive, but it’s worth it. That depends on the degree you get, though.
Try online dating. A vast majority of people meet online now. There are a lot of apps. Some are hookups apps and others are dating apps. I’ve heard hinge is good.
In summary, don’t actively search for someone. Live life the way you want and keep your eyes open.
If you find someone good, allow yourself to change a bit to become more compatible. Don’t lose who you are, but change isn’t always bad.
“I’m a teen”
“Have only had on relationship”
I swear, teenagers these days think you’re a loser if you don’t have a 3 digit body count by 16