I’m testing a hypothesis. Lots of European cultures have different standards surrounding same sex affection. I think generations might as well, particularly Gen Z.
What country do you live in, what generation are you, and how comfortable are you hugging and being affectionate towards your buddies? Do you think there are generational differences in how cuddly guy friends get with each other? Or is that just gay?
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I’m testing a hypothesis. Lots of European cultures have different standards surrounding same sex affection. I think generations might as well, particularly Gen Z.
What country do you live in, what generation are you, and how comfortable are you hugging and being affectionate towards your buddies? Do you think there are generational differences in how cuddly guy friends get with each other? Or is that just gay?
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I’m a 21 years old Israeli and I hug my friends all the time. Even the more religious – homophobic people here hug their friends.
I’ve never met anyone irl who actually found it gay
American, me and my friends are ok with hugging it out, we are a bit distant but we are our own tribe.
I’m more comfortable hugging them than most girls lol. Especially back when I was single haha
I hug men and women alike, if they’re friends.
US, millennial (34). I hug my best friend with no weirdness, and the others I’ve either never met in person or haven’t seen in over a decade because we all moved to different parts of the country. But I’m perfectly comfortable hugging people if they are.
I’m in the US, Gen z I think, I’ll hug my boys and on a special occasion I’ll give them a kiss on the cheek if the accomplishment is big enough
How drunk am I?
I’m a Canadian millennial in my late 30s. I hug all my friends. It would be weird if I didn’t .
Very comfortable. I mean it depends on the situation cuz like if I’m at the club and just walk up and bear hug them, not gunna go well.
However, like I just embraced one of my best friends recently for a very long hug. He had just achieved something he has been trying to accomplish and it was a big moment.
I wouldn’t try this with my older guy friends but they are also more like mentors but I would also assume they don’t see it how younger guys do.
This “soft guy era” is a real thing. Men are seeking more emotional attachments and are trying support men more.
TLDR; yes my younger friends for sure but the older ones not really. No it’s not gay.
I was born and raised in the US, but I’ve lived in the UK for nine years now. I hug my British friends and American friends all the time when I visit them or when they come here. I’ve kissed some. You never know what someone is going through or when you’ll last see them. I don’t want any friend to ever feel I don’t care about them. I’m not interested of what people think of our relationships.
Depends on the guy. I don’t have any issue huggingale friends. Some just aren’t the type. And that’s cool too
I’m in the US. I hug my male friend every time I see them. Then we usually compliment each other on smelling good because some of us are really into finding new soaps
We hug all the time and touch tips and everything
I mean i don’t see them every other day like old times so a hug is normal when i say hi and bye these days .
More comfortable than they are about it.
Guy or female friends, doesn’t matter, I feel awkward hugging anyone outside of close family: wife, daughter, niblings, sister.
I am a hand shaker but if a hug is presented, I’ll never turn one down.
i go for side hugs
As a millennial in America hugging friends is the norm.
We were just staying in Big Bear for an evening and the Millennials we met in the bar we hugged when we left.
Then later that night we made friends with 4 Gen Z in the hot tub and they all lined up and shook our hands when we left. It was funny to see the difference between the 2 generations.
I hug all my boys, 28m USA
I’m 23, Slavic, we hug a lot. Sometimes even give each other pecks on the cheek when we’re very drunk.
I’m an American and I regularly hug my guy friends. I think it’s more popular now than it used to be.
Totally fine as long as they don’t get a boner. Fr, totally fine every time
I have no problem hugging my bros, especially my best friend who I served with and haven’t seen him in about 13 years
I’m not against it but we never do. A handshake is sufficient.
US millennial 33m. In the south, it’s ok but really depends. Personally, I just don’t like being touched or to close to anybody, unless it’s a female that I want to be close to. I do have a few friends that will hug and i don’t mind it. It’s nice sometimes getting a good hug from someone. Will tell my buddies that I love them sometimes.
Went through rehabs and sober living places, going to AA/NA meetings, really got me comfortable with hugging random people, holding hands during prayer type stuff. 1 yr 8 months sober, so it’s still working
American Millenial, and I hug my close guy friends all the time.
NZ, Millennial, No issues hugging my friends
I hug the homies all the time
As long as it’s quick
I hug dude friends all the time. Usually a one arm hug, not the two arm, though.
Bear hug, comfort hug, bro hug. Whatever they need to feel appreciated.
41m American. We hug all The time. Even if I meet new groups for like a bachelor party or something, we are always hugging as a greeting and definitely goodbye.
Very
M29 From the UK absolutely no problem for me hugging the boys, less common than the lady’s still they practically hug every time they see a blue sky or a passing car, but I regularly hug my guy friends and they hug me not gay not weird we also bro hug, dap each other up or tackle each other to the ground occasionally. Actually thats not really a common thing, that might just be our friend group it’s like a game, because there’s nothing funnier than seeing your bro get unexpectedly side swiped and his beer go flying especially when he’s chatting up a girl or on the phone with his girlfriend, classic!
Even in america.. theres dudes ill give a handshake. And dudes ill maybe hug. But its rare.
It depends entirely on the friendship. How it was formed and the dynamics.
But i will say this.
I dont like hugs. Its simply uncomfy for me. Its not autism. Its just not my thing and i like personal space. I simultaneously dont like people standing behind me. Ill tolerate it. But its more like a trust thing.
Ill let my mother hug me. And a few friends. But i generally dont like it.
50 year old Canadian. Neither my nor any other male friend groups I have witnessed hug their guy friends. I don’t even like to hug female friends to be honest.
For me not at all. I totally won’t hug anyone except for significant others or women I find attractive.
When it comes to guys, it’s not the gay-ness of it. Rather, it’s the smells and body fluids that come with close contact. Nothing inherently wrong with that as it’s just nature, but it absolutely repulses me. Sweat and body odours give me the ick. Especially men’s musky smells.
I have the same reaction towards most women. But if it’s someone cute, I absolutely do not mind the intimacy. So maybe the cause is pheromones or something psychological.
I often hug my friends. 54 M
NZ, X very comfortable.
American millennial, I hug all the people! Unless they’ve shown in the past that they prefer not to hug!
I’m 40, the boys (coworkers) are between 19-46, they all get hugs. My best friends do too
USA, Gen X, I hug my close male friends all the time.
Gen X, UK, friends of between 30 and 55, hug em all.
Very comfortable, I greet all friends I haven’t seen for a while with hugs.
Ill hug my boy/s like its the last thing ive ever done, the closest friends i’ve ever had never made it an issue, and the ones who i can think about that would make it weird, are people im no longer friends with
Canadian (but born in eastern Europe), male 32, I hug my male Canadian friends and they hug me, it’s normal and not weird
Little bug or bro hug isn’t a big deal. Not like it’s a lingering thing lol.
Irish and don’t hug anyone, male or female, other than my wife or sons.
Czech 32m, in my friend group we don’t do the hug thing. I don’t remember ever hugging them.
Gex X, USA, absolutely have no problem hugging my male friends, do so all the time, and always have.
However, I don’t “cuddle” with friends, male or female.
USA I hug male friends, comfortable hugging and being hugged.
I wouldn’t hug a bro that isn’t into hugging though, and it’s just a quick bro hug. Not like im fully pressing up on them.
Most of my non intimate hugs are just side hugs, regardless how im hugged.
All the time. Men need support from other men. Not that my wife doesn’t support me emotionally etc, but men go through and process things differently and it’s important to get differing views from other men.
Me and my boys are violently homosexual towards eachother and half of them are married with kids.
American mid 20s
Im only comfortable hugging my wife and my son. I won’t even hug my mom. So no.
I hug all my friends, regardless of wether they’re male or female
Growing up as an Italian, Italian men kissed each other all the time. I was born in 1970, and I do hug my male friends, but I’ve gotten some slack over this when done in public by strangers. I also kiss my male friends on the cheek to greet them. I live in the USA but used to live in Italy. Older Italians were very openly affectionate with one another, but this is changing a bit with the more modern generation.
58 yo, I think that makes me Gen X. I am more than happy hugging guy friends. I do it all the time. Born and raised in the US
Canadian 46, and i expect a good hug from all friends
I was going to say “On a scale of 1 to 10: European” but you said it too.
I’m Greek, nobody cares, people hug.
I hug them and tell them I love them.
100% ok
Millennial Canadian of Anglo-Scottish descent- I’m quite comfortable hugging my guy friends. Of course I only hug them if they like hugs. I find on average French Canadians are more demonstrative than English Canadians.
37 m NC USA. I hug all my friends. I love them, no one finds it odd.
Lol I’m 38 year old American.
Not only do I hug my guy friends, but sometimes I pick up when I hug em. I smack their booties when I’m walking by. I call them stud muffins. I compliment their biceps. I tell them I love them and that I miss them.
We play on a football team together and none of us are gay.
I’m not a big hugger but I’ve had guys hug me I find it weird. Usually we just do a dap up and that how we do it.
Millennial, American: Depends on the friend, and how long we’ve known each other, but I’m down for a good hug if it’s been a while. Then from there, I just hug it out each time. The more homophobic friends I have the more I make them hug me anyway, cause in the military we just do shit like that to fuck with each other in any way possible to pass the time. That habit stuck after I got out.
I was raised in no touching manner. Food and taking care was the love language taught in my family and not hugging each other or saying I love you to each other.
I’m an adult now, I go above and beyond to take care of my friends and family, but I don’t know how to hug. I used to fist bump my boyfriend during the beginning of our relationship lol
Gen X from Brooklyn. Hug all the friends of all the genders all the time.
Hate it
Eh, I’m not a big hug person in general. I save the hugs for things a tier higher than every day interaction. As far as for my guy friends, of course I’ll hug them if the occasion is appropriate.
Depends on the friend.
I don’t want to hug my friends. British living in the US. It bothers me how often Americans want to hug. They can hug each other, it isn’t a gay thing to do. People like to hug but I don’t want to hug them and then it’s kinda awkward.
I hug my friends when it’s been a while since we last meant. But I don’t normally hug friends.
USA. Really depends on the guy. Some are into it, some are not. Some I’m close to, some I’m not.
It’s not something I do, or ever even think about, so I don’t know. It’s not about “comfort” if it’s just utterly meaningless. I suppose of some guy wants to hug I wouldn’t care enough about it to feel any type of way. It’s no more complicated than a handshake or fist bump.
American, millennial: yeah, I have no problem hugging my friends. No weirdness
nah man, right hook to any man who approches me with spread arms
hand shake is business
Very
Totally fine with hugging friends. I am American and I would say I am a millennial.
Canada mid 40s. I hug my close friends fairly often. But we are all immigrants or the children of immigrants. Mostly from Italy, Portugal, South America, and Iran.
i have flying tackle hugged multiple of them.
its especially fun, when they dont see it coming.
USA – i hug my friends if i haven’t seen them for a long time or if it’s a close friend i do almost every time i see them
I hug and kiss all my friends and family. Some don’t like the smooches, they get the most of them. Mostly on the lips or neck for extra discomfort.
Naked or clothed???
56 yr old American. It never bothered me to hug men. Friends hug, that is just how it goes.
I’m a US Millennial, 32, in the PNW. In my experience, it depends on the person and context. If it’s someone I’m friends with and haven’t seen in a while, I will go for the hug. I probably wouldn’t do it if it were someone I see regularly.
I’ve noticed guys around my age have less hang ups about hugging than older generations. I don’t think it is gay at all.
I hug my male friends. I also tell them I love them. But, I’m almost 40 and most of them I’ve been friends with for over 30 years.
Edit: From Oklahoma, USA
American here and have become a hugger with everyone.
I don’t even hug my dad. I am not hugging my friends.
I dont hug my friends, not regularly, perhaps on a special occasion after much time or something unique, but nah, we’re very untouchy, thank god
I’ve always been an emotional guy. The guy friends I’ve opened up to, I 100% will hug whenever they want, and whenever we want. Guys need just as much support as anyone else. The days of suppressing your emotions need to be behind us.
Zero issues hugging it out with the boys
33 Aussie, I hug all my mates, life’s too short to give two shits about how anyone else might feel about it.
Hugs are fine….very common….but stop grinding when in close….
I’m okay with it
Hug or dap depends on how close we are
I always try to hug my guy friends. They need to know I love them and I’m always there for them. We’ve had lots of family and friends pass away and I like to let them know they’re important to me. Love hurts but love hard, you just never know if today or tomorrow is their last.
Pues si son mis amigos es por algo, abrazo a amigos y amigas por igual porque les tengo confianza
I live in Plymouth, Devon, uk… i hug all my friends and tell them I love them every time I see them. Iv got the best friends in existence though to be fair
Grew up in India, in my experience nobody hugs anyone, only a tiny percentage hugs even within family. Hugging is mostly reserved for romantic intimacy.
I am not a hugger, but everyone I know hugs, so I give it my best try.
It’s not that I’m uncomfortable, I just feel like I don’t need to and growing up my family wasn’t very touchy feely.
USA, to give you some idea, I don’t really even want to fist bump my friends when they stick their hands out. So we don’t hug
The homies get hugs unless the homie doesn’t want hugs, then the homie gets whatever level of physical affection he is comfortable with.
I’d sit on my buddy’s lap in my boxers for movie night
Us, 35, haven’t blown a dude yet.
Situational and depends on the person. Don’t do it much with most of my friends
European – Balkans, we hug all the time and it’s common to kiss cheeks
I will hug just about anyone. I love hugs and I give real good ones.
All my close guy friends, we’ve been friends for over 25 years and they know I troll a lot. When we hug it out, I’m going full on ass grab.
Im 21, gen z from us. Ill give a freind a sort of side hug after not seeing them for a while, but it depends on the friend, some people are more comfortable with hugs than others
Comfortable enough to say,
“I love you (friends name here)”
when doing so. Let your friends know you care. You never know if it’s the last time you’ll see them again.
I hug everybody
East coast American 23M. I hug the homies all the time. Never hug women unless I’m in a relationship with them. Mostly cus I don’t want to come off weird
Edit: if a woman initiates the hug I certainly accept it.
Hug it out bro
Everyone needs a hug
USA millennial. Depends on which buddy it is
I’m Brazilian and have 17 Years, me and my group of friends all Hug each other, i also like to Hug everyone, except for women because i think they might get unconfortable, but sometimes i ask if i’m friends with her.
If you’re not willing to hug another man because you’re worried it’s gay or something, you might wanna do some soul searching and figure out what you’re running from.
I hug the bros and tell them I love them. Doesn’t mean I wanna smash. The only thing that makes you gay is being sexually attracted to men.
Monsters hugged eachother and kissed eachother cheeks. They would also murder you if they found out you were gay, and are pieces of shit. Most people consider them masculine, no?
Also, I travel and work in construction. Stereotypical macho vibe. When we see guys we worked with years prior on another job or something, it’s a handshake right into a hug. Usually yelling at each other from across the site and waving first like Forest Gump when he’s on the boat and sees Lt. Dan.
Australia, i hug all my bros when i see them esp if its been a whille
Depends how long bro needs it
I hug men only after the handshake. Usually when saying farewell
Depends, but I hug a lot of my male friends as a greeting, but rarely strangers.
The US
Millennial – Gen Y
Very. Also don’t have any struggle telling them I love them.
I think each generation has unique experiences and from those unique tendencies.
I hug the fuck out of my homies
USA, GenX, I hate hugging everyone, what sex they are doesn’t matter
Very comfortable with men and women. I DONT GIVE A FUCK!
I have always been comfortable with it but we rarely did until we aged a little and lost a few of the Bro’s along the way. Now we freely hug each other and tell each other we love them.
You never get a do over to say your last goodbyes.
I find it odd that people will make huge efforts to come to a funeral and say nice things and spend time with the departed’s shell of a body or cremated remains – if only they had done that when he was still alive, maybe had one more memory together. Hug your friends. Tell them you love them. Make time for that beer.
33M living in Canada but Colombian born. Moved here when I was 6. I’m straight and married, but have no issues hugging my bros, they’re all from different backgrounds and there are no issues with hugs and arms around the shoulder. We are all very comfortable with our sexuality and we understand this kind of affection is very normal.
Because I’m from a Latino background, cheek kisses when saying hello/goodbye are also very common but much more with family and family friends – once in a while if the boys are having a deep personal chat there will be a long hug with a peck on the cheek, we also say “love you man” on occasion.
There is a terrible stigma in North America and men showing other men platonic affection, and I think we should work on getting rid of this.
yes. freehugsfor everyone, we know we need it
I’ll hug anybody.
Some friends only hug if it’s been a while, some only when drinking is involved, some we hug so much that the girls ask if we’re gay
Depends who it is and what the reason is for it.
Sometimes a simple mutual head-nod, handshake, or fist-bump will suffice. Though, if the moment is significant enough, and they’re a close-enough or an old-enough friend, then sure.
I don’t care if a dude needs a hug it doesn’t bother me. It’s not “gay” to be there for your friends.
Originally born in Ireland, living in Canada for the last few years and I’m entering my 30s next year.
Hugging guy friends, outside of funerals or weddings just it’s part of my culture. I don’t know any straight guys that are particularly cuddly with other guys, generation has nothing to do with it.